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Attempts Attempt1 score is4Attempt 2 was not attempted.-Attempt 3 was not attempted.-
Keep the Highest 4 out of 4
2 . Revision - Exercise 2
You have a paper due on Friday. Your paper topic is on jet lag. Before you turn in your final draft, you
ask your friend to help you revise some of the paragraphs in your paper. Read your friend's
suggestions and then revise your sentences.
Directions: Combine sentences 3 and 4 to add sentence variety.
(1) If you are flying from one time zone to another and are suffering from fatigue, insomnia, and
irritability, you might be experiencing jet lag. (2) But you may not have to suffer! (3) Experts have
devised many treatments. (4) Experts have divided these treatments into two main types.
Which of the following is the best revision based on your friend's suggestion?
Divide them into two types.
Experts have devised many treatments that can be divided into two main types.
Experts have devised many treatments, and these treatments devised by experts can be divided into
two main types.
Points:
1 / 1
Close Explanation
Explanation:
The best revision is "Experts have devised many treatments that can be divided into two main types"
because it is the most concise and it does not eliminate needed information.
Divide them into two types eliminates necessary information about experts, and Experts have devised
many treatments, and these treatments devised by experts can be divided into two main types is
wordy because it repeats treatments and experts.
Directions: Use parallel structure in sentence 6.
(5) One well-established type of jet-lag treatment is diet, though even the experts don't agree on
which foods are most effective. (6) Some hold that a heavy intake of carbohydrates prior to departure
will help stave off jet lag, while others advocate a low-carb regimen. (7) The best-known diet, which
has been around for decades, prescribes a combination of protein-rich meals and those filled with
carbohydrates. (8) With so many different recommendations floating around, you'd probably need to
do some experimenting to figure out which (if any) of these work for you.
Which of the following is the best revision based on your friend's suggestion?
The best-known diet, which has been around for decades, prescribes a combination of full of protein
and carbohydrate-rich meals.
The best-known diet, which has been around for decades, prescribes a combination of protein-rich and
full of carbohydrate meals.
The best-known diet, which has been around for decades, prescribes a combination of protein-rich
and carbohydrate-rich meals.
Points:
1 / 1
Close Explanation
Explanation:
The best revision is "The best-known diet, which has been around for decades, prescribes a
combination of protein-rich and carbohydrate-rich meals." The phrases protein-rich and carbohydrate-
rich are parallel adjective phrases.
Directions: Add more details in sentence 10.
(9) Another increasingly common type of jet-lag treatment is light therapy. (10) Travelers can now buy
miniature fluorescent lights that imitate sunlight, or on the opposite end of the spectrum, eye pillows
and eye shades that block out light. (11) Many hotel rooms use light therapy. (12) If you are planning
on traveling in the near future, keep these jet-lag treatments in mind. (13) Whether you prefer a diet-
related or a light-related remedy, you should be able to find one that works for you!
Which of the following is the best revision based on your friend's suggestion?
Many hotel rooms feature both curtains and lights.
Hotel rooms using light therapy really help travelers a lot.
Many hotel rooms feature both heavy, light-blocking curtains and lights that imitate sunlight.
Points:
1 / 1
Close Explanation
Explanation:
The best revision is "Many hotel rooms feature both heavy, light-blocking curtains and lights that
imitate sunlight." This sentence contains the most precise language because it tells us exactly how
hotel rooms use light therapy. The other choices are vague and do not provide enough concrete
information.
Source: Wong, Kathy. "5 Jet Lag Remedies. Natural Remedies to Avoid Jet Lag." 19 July 2006. 27 April
2010.
