Movie Review: Couples Retreat
Lesly Vaca Contreras
School of Behavioral Sciences, Liberty University
Author Note
Lesly Vaca Contreras
I have no known conflict of interest to disclose.
Correspondence concerning this article should be addressed to Lesly Vaca Contreras.
Email: Lvacacontreras@liberty.edu
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Movie Review: Couples Retreat
The Review
The film Couples Retreat tells the story of four married couples who travel to an island
paradise called the Eden Resort. Out of the four couples, there is one couple who is thinking
about divorcing. Interestingly, this couple has given much thought to what would happen due to
their divorce. Therefore, they decide to give each other one week at this resort devoted to healing
relationships. However, to afford this trip, Jason and Cynthia need their other friends to go with
them so they can split the cost. Their friends refuse to go because they believe they are
reasonably happy and do not need therapy. Jason and Cynthia convince them and end up at the
Eden Resort.
Each couple, except Jason and Cynthia, believed their marriages were thriving. It was
until they began their therapy sessions that they realized some unresolved issues. Jason and
Cynthia are at the point of divorce because they are in anguish about being unable to have a
child. The other couples are Dave and Ronnie, who let their parenting duties distract them from
romance, and Joey, and Lucy, who got married very young and have lost their passion for one
another. Lastly, Shane and Trudy, who have divorced. Each couple is resistant to believing they
have issues in their marriage. As a result, there’s tension and fights; however, in the end, couples
realize their mistakes and reconcile.
The impactful scenes in this film are when each couple faces their counselor for the first
time, and all believe their marriage is okay. It is until the counselor asks questions that they start
noticing they are probably not okay. There is this denial that there could be any issues. For
someone watching this film for the first time, they should look for those scenes that portray the
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results of untreated marital problems. For example, the outlets that these non-Christian couples
take. Jason and Cynthia choose the outlet of divorce if they cannot work things out. Joy and
Lucy choose the outlet where they are okay satisfying their emotional and sexual needs through
other men, women, and masturbation. This film demonstrates how many marriages deny their
issues and instead choose outlets such as these. I believe this is an area that warrants further
reflection. How do we get marriages to counseling when they resist discussing these issues?
Therapeutic Application
In the context of the film, three of the four couples are resistant to counseling. As Ripley
and Worthington (2014), “A resistance is an inner psychological barrier to change,” and it
happens because couples might be afraid of changing their relationship or them. Couples may
fear something is wrong with them and that “counseling will confirm their insecurities.” When
Dave and Ronnie meet with their counselor, they face questions that make them realize their
marriage needs work. They are resistant to believe this. It seems it is taking an emotional toll on
them because they thought “making it through” their marriage was good enough. Especially
when their lifetime systems and routines with the kids are threatened. As Ripley and Worthington
(2014) explain, clients are flooded with vulnerability, fear, sadness, anger, and frustration. In the
film, it seems their counselor made overcoming resistance a therapy goal. In the end, because
they became aware of these unseen issues, they can work them out and have more united
marriage. This scene has a cognitive and emotional connection where they unite their unique
minds to shift to a shared vision and mission in their marriage. This is what Moitinho and
Moitinho (2020) explain as “intellectual intimacy” (p. 164).
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Likewise, when Joy and Lucy meet with their counselor, they are asked questions
challenging their “good and stable” marriage. This scene demonstrates the goals of the “intake
session” to gain information that will help conceptualize the couple's treatment. After listening to
Joy and Lucy, the counselor concludes that they are both desperately waiting for their only
daughter to leave the house so they can go their own way. The counselor senses no emotional or
physical intimacy in their answers. Later scenes show how the counselor finally gets them to open
up and discuss their feelings. This scene has an emotional connection where the couple engages
in authenticity and vulnerability.
My rationale for choosing these scenes relies on the effective approaches that each
counselor takes with their couple. Each couple is facing different struggles. However, one
common factor is how counselors perceive resistance. When the counselors face this resistance,
they do not give up. Instead, they begin intervening. It is as if the counselors perform what Ripley
and Worthington (2014) explain as a “dyadic semistructured oral interview.” They ask questions
that help them meditate and reflect on areas of their lives and their emotions. These are
therapeutic implications that are applicable when counseling couples. When I encounter married
couples struggling with opening up, denial, and resistance, I can have an intake session where I
listen and build rapport. Lastly, building rapport can include different questions for each couple,
according to each individual’s struggles.
Personal/Professional Implications
In his book 10 Lessons to Transform Your Marriage, Gottman et al. (2007) talk about
how the “focus on the kids can disguise the real trouble” (p. 224). In the film, Dave and Ronnie
are proud of their " teamwork " in caring for their children. However, they are so busy that there
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has been no room for themselves as a couple. I like what Gottman et al. (2007) say, “meeting
your kids’ needs and meeting your spouse’s needs are not mutually exclusive goals” (p. 224).
Children are a blessing from God (Psalms 127:3), but they may also become a source of stress in
the couple’s lives. Moitinho and Moitinho (2020) discuss how “many couples neglect their
marital relationship while raising their children because they make their children the center of
their affection” (p. 204). I have three children, and seeing this film, confirmed a few things I was
aware of. This one is one of them. Many marriages are so focused on their children that they do
not invest in their marriages. Second, when marriages are challenged with hard questions,
resistance usually occurs because they fear change.
The film offered insight into how to overcome couples that believe everything is “fine.”
These tools will be beneficial when facing married couples struggling to be honest with
themselves. In counseling a non-Christian couple, there is also a need to recognize the outlets
this world offers. Scriptures say in John 10:10 that the enemy has come only to “steal, kill, and
destroy.” Therefore, as portrayed in the film, counselors cannot disregard the possibilities of
emotional and physical infidelity. All in all, everything must be considered when making rapport.
Lastly, I want to note how the counselors in the film brought awareness to the marriages; I agree
that getting the married couple to realize their struggles is already a win. The film formulates
great strategies for counseling non-Christian married couples.
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References
Gottman, J., PhD, Gottman, J. S., & DeClaire, J. (2007). Ten Lessons to Transform Your
Marriage: America’s Love Lab Experts Share Their Strategies for Strengthening Your =
Relationship. National Geographic Books.
Moitinho, E., & Moitinho, D. (2020). The Dream Home: How to Create an Intimate Christian
Marriage.
NIV Bible - New International Version | The NIV Bible Translation. (2021, June 4). NIV
Ripley, J. S., & Worthington, E. L., Jr. (2014). Couple Therapy: A New Hope-Focused
Approach. InterVarsity Press.
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