COMS 560
JOURNAL ACTIVITIES TEMPLATE
Journal Activity 1
In the table below, the left-hand column contains sets of communication expressions that indicate conflict from
a particular metaphorical position. In the column on the right, follow the italics example in set 1 by filling in
the blanks underneath “Metaphor for Conflict.” Be sure to identify:
1) Where the scene of the conflict is.
2) Who the participants are.
3) Who must win the battle and by what method.
4) What is the outcome/purpose of the conflict?
Communication Expressions Metaphor for Conflict
Set 1:
Your actions are completely indefensible. He
attacked me where I was most vulnerable – my
kids. That criticism is right on target. Okay, shoot!
Accusations were hurled back and forth. I just
retreat. I fall back and regroup. Then I wait for an
opening. He slaughters me when I cry and get
confused. When I don’t want it to come to blow
(laughs), I launch a diversionary attack, like telling
him the kids are calling me.
WAR
The scene for conflict is battlefield. The
participants in discussion are warriors who must
win the battle. Nothing falls short of “killing” or
reducing the effectiveness of the opponent. The
purpose or outcome is inevitably a reduction of
players, harm, desire for vengeance and a
repetition of the battle.
Set 2:
He’s about to blow up. Any little thing will set him
off. Larry’s got a short fuse. The pressure’s
building up so fast that something’s gotta give
soon! I just need to let off steam. She is really
pushing my buttons.
EXPLOSION
Set 3:
He’s got the best case. The jury’s still out on that
one. You’re accusing me of what? She’s the guilty
party on this one.
TRIAL
Set 4:
I’m on a sinking ship with no lifeboat. I’m
traveling a rocky road. I’m working with a
checkbook that won’t balance.
STRUGGLE
Set 5:
I felt like being “a rowboat caught in a hurricane.
Tornado,
Avalanche
I was swept away,
Like a fire raging out of control.
ACT OF NATURE
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COMS 560
Journal Activity 2
Borisoff & Victor, p. 31: Suggested Activities C, Apology Letter
Dear Kathy,
I would like to start off by apologizing for not being there for you as a sister when you had your
miscarriage. Going through it myself I understand the hurt, pain, and feeling of loss you were going through. I
remember when I experienced my miscarriage. Although I wanted to be left alone to grieve you and the entire
family was there to console me, support me, and be there for me. There is no excuse for my behavior but all I
can say is I used poor judgment and did not show my love to you and your family. I know there is no way to
make this up but I hope that this can be the beginning of forgiveness and reconciliation. I truly love you, your
husband, and my nephew very much and I pray that we may move forward no longer separate but together.
Love,
Your Sister
Dear Sis,
I appreciate your letter and I see your honesty and sincerity through your words. I was not in a good
place when I lost the baby and I felt alone, lost, and confused that such a thing could happen to me. My
intentions for telling you what I was going through was not to hurt you or make you feel bad but to make you
recognize that I, your sister, was suffering and your support and compassion was needed. I pray that through
this experience both you and I learn from it and never let something like this happen again. Love goes way
farther than just mere words but through our actions.
Love,
Kathy
Journal Activity 3
Cahn & Abigail 2 Discuss it. #2 p. 52. Please write out answer. No discussion group.
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COMS 560
1. After this disagreement I believe that the son left upset and misunderstood and the father was left
upset and that he failed as a father. When the roles change, whereas a son now becomes a man and a
father now becomes an equal, it is very difficult to learn how to operate in a respectable manner
without lessening honor. The mother’s silence also indicates her unwillingness to stand up and
speak in order to calm the situation, like a mediator. This is definitely a routinized event as the son
continues to refer to the way the father treated him as a child. The mother, father, and son all went
into their scripted roles from the past instead of addressing the problem in the present with a new
eye. I consider this to be avoiding/accommodating conflict communication.
2. Addressing the man publicly should not have happened as this escalated the situation. He should
have pulled the man aside so that it would not cause a scene and embarrass him in front of the
students. I consider this to be competitive conflict communication.
Journal Activity 4
Cahn & Abigail 3 p. 74 Work With It. #1
Theoretical Tools How It Helps Analyze Conflicts
Psychodynamic Theory Helps us understand that aggressive impulses
result from internal conflict between the id and the
superego, which produces tension, stress,
insecurity, anxiety, hostility, sexual urges, or
depression that may lead to frustration.
Attribution Theory Helps explain retaliatory behavior-we respond the
way we do because we assume we understand why
people behave as they do.
Uncertainty Theory Helps explain false conflicts, which occur when at
least one person in an interdependent relationship
thinks that there is conflict but after talking to
others involved, finds there is no conflict.
Social Exchange Theory People choose their behaviors due to self-interest
and a desire to maximize rewards while
minimizing costs.
Systems Theory Helps get a better grasp of the picture.
Journal Activity 5
Cahn & Abigail 4 Apply it p. 102 #4
Needs Feelings
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COMS 560
A
B
C
D
E
F
G
H
I
Journal Activity 6
Cahn & Abigail 4 Apply it p. 102 #5
A
H
J
Journal Activity 7
Cahn & Abigail 4 -Apply It - p. 102 #6 Journal Activity 8
White Hat-The participants are I and my supervisor. It started last Friday in our office and it was
regarding my scheduling, time, and work performance.
Red Hat-I feel that our professional relationship was put on the back burner in order to build a personal
relationship on the part of my supervisor. I am not happy at the conflict directly but am glad that now it
will be strictly professional which is what I wanted to begin with but did not enforce since she was
having difficulties building relationships with coworkers.
Yellow Hat-I would rather the professional than the personal because I am a Christian and they are not.
There are many things I do not agree with but feel I have to tread easy because she is my direct
supervisor. Professional is the way to go.
Black Hat-Comments like the bible is fake and I don’t believe it. Comments that I’m not liberated
enough because I am not for gay marriage. Closing my eyes to personal agendas superseding
professional agenda. All these add up to an unhealthy and unprofessional environment.
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COMS 560
Green hat-I know she has had a difficult life and can be more understanding to her views and beliefs.
Wants to build relationships with women as she does not have many female friends and lacks support
and sisterhood.
Blue Hat-I condoned the behavior so I am part to blame. I should have spoken up but let fear cripple me
from doing what I needed to do. Maybe suggesting after hours activities if both parties want to pursue a
relationship outside of work.
Cahn & Abigail 5 Work with it #1 p. 130 #1-5 answer all questions after case study.
Journal Activity 9
Sande, chs. 4 and 5: Reflection paragraph
Reconcile Sande’s approach to “rights” and “I” statements on p. 92 and 102–109 with Cahn & Abigail’s
list of rights on p. 83. Are these two approaches compatible with each other? Write no more than a ½
page.
I believe they are compatible with one another. As it is stated regarding rights, “we all have basic
communication rights.” This means that if we feel someone is violating one of these rights we have the
right to then walk away so that you can regroup, calm down, and evaluate the situation so that things do
not escalate and you explode which will make matters worse. This is where, “you calm down and
compose an appropriate I-statement.” They go hand in hand when things begin to get out of control.
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