Liberty University
PACO 604
DOMESTIC ABUSE INTERVENTIONS
Allison Gaddy
Introduction
Domestic abuse is an epidemic in society. The National Coalition Against Domestic
Violence describes it as “willful intimidation, physical assault, battery, sexual assault, as well as
other abusive behavior as part of a systematic pattern of power and control perpetrated by one
intimate partner against another. It includes physical violence, sexual violence, threats,
economic, emotional and psychological abuse.”1 One of every three women will experience
domestic abuse at the hands of an intimate partner in their lifetime.2 In the United States, more
than ten million adults experience domestic violence every year. This equals to someone being
abused every three seconds.3 This paper will address women as victims of domestic violence, as
the statistics show that women bear the worst impacts of abuse. While men may be victims of
abuse as well, the prevalence of female victims cannot be dismissed. Furthermore, due to
patriarchal beliefs and male privilege, men tend to be perpetrators of abuse more than women.4
Within the Church, domestic abuse numbers are parallel with secular society. Yet many pastors
are not equipped or prepared to counsel those being abused. Therefore, church interventions, if
any, are insufficient and mismanaged, at times making matters worse.5 Despite this, the Church
has an important role in domestic violence interventiomn, and must take that role seriously in the
pursuit of protecting the people entrusted to her care.
This paper will explore the impacts of domestic abuse, and research based interventions that
can alleviate the resulting trauma, from both a secular and religious standpoint.
1 Coalition Website
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3 Coalition website
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Dynamics of Domestic Abuse
Domestic abuse is a pattern of rage and contempt used to establish and maintain power and
control over another.6 It typically follows a discernible pattern of behavior in which tension
exists in the relationship until something occurs and the abuser lashes out at the victim. Once the
abusive incident has occurred, there is a false sense of peace and remorse, until tension starts to
build again. The cycle of abuse continues unabated until someone or something changes the
dynamic in the relationship.
Domestic violence is a leading cause of injury and death to women and children worldwide.7
Women who have been abused typically struggle with chronic pain, gastrointestinal disorders,
heart disease, high blood pressure, and a host of other issues that can limit daily functioning. This
is especially true when emotional abuse is present or predominant. Abused women struggle with
severe mental health injuries, antisocial behavior, emotional dysregulation, dissociation, and
suicidal behaviors.8
There are only a few things that can change the dynamics of an abusive relationship.9 If the
victim gains clarity on the situation, pursues strength and healing for herself, and establishes
boundaries and consequences for how she must be treated, the abuse may stop.10 However, this
may prove dangerous to the survivor, and accountability must be available for the abuser.
Redemption is possible, but the abuser must be brought to a place of genuine repentance, which
may be difficult to discern from the toxic remorse of the abuse cycle.11 The other option is for the
victim to leave the situation entirely. However, this is not always possible, nor safe. Many
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10 Vernick
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women who have been murdered by their partners were in the process of leaving an abusive
relationship.12 Interventions must take into consideration the safety of the survivor and children
should they choose to leave.
Domestic Abuse Interventions
Abuse intervention requires acknowledging the abuse and speaking up about it.13 This is
difficult for many survivors. When one is abused, one starts to question their own perceptions
and reality, as abuse is normalized in culture and entertainment,14 and many adult abuse victims
and perpetrators were abused children.15 Therefore, many victims are not able to articulate that
they are being abused. Being abused feels normal and being safe feels threatening. Further,
victims may fear being judged by others due to internalizing the lies of the abuser.
Also, many churches shun and blame victims for abuse rather than stepping in to help and
protect.16 Research has shown that the incidence of domestic abuse within the church correlates
with the prevalence of such violence in secular society.17 The main difference is the added
vulnerability of Christian women due to the teachings of headship, submission, unconditional
honor and respect of husbands, and the power of forgiveness and prayer to change the abuser. It
is the religious language itself that perpetrates and tolerates domestic violence within the walls of
the Church.18
Domestic violence is the leading cause of homelessness for women and children across the
globe.19 There are not enough shelters and community organizations to meet the ever growing
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13 Vernick
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demand for shelter and safety.20 Therefore, it is imperative that the church develop intervention
strategies to meet the needs of abused people in their midst. While community agencies are an
important part of the intervention process, the overwhelmed systems cannot handle the demand.
However, very few, if any, Pastors are adequately prepared to counsel survivors of
domestic violence.21 Many times, churches ignore the signs of abuse and attribute them to normal
marital discord, thereby placing blame on the victim rather than relieving the oppression of
abuse. Counsel given tends to be geared towards saving the marriage at all costs, even if the cost
is the woman’s soul.
Some pastors do not believe abuse is a problem in their church, being under the assumption
that if it was a problem, they would know about it. Some believe that abuse in homes is a private
matter, and thus not the business of the church. Others do not understand abuse because they
would never mistreat their wives, so they cannot fathom a man that would do such a thing. Some
are also abusers, and believe women get what they deserve when they are abused.22
Therefore, women in churches frequently stay silent about the abuse, or reach out and are
further traumatized by the religious barriers to seeking help and support. When one is
disbelieved and retraumatized by the Church, it can seem as though God Himself does not care
about the trauma occurring in one’s life.
Ideal Church Intervention
The work of trauma response is a work of the Gospel.23 The Gospel is meant to change
lives, not just secure heaven. Thus, the Gospel not only frees people from the spiritual
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bondage to sin, bringing them alive in Christ, but it also compels true Christians to free
others from bondage to trauma and abuse in their homes, churches and communities.24
Abuse intervention also involves helping and healing the abuser. Most abusers have been
abused and are deeply hurting individuals. They need the hope of the Gospel if they are to
change their ways. This is accomplished through strict accountability, consequences, and
consistent calls to repentance.25
The church represents God to those struggling with abuse and trauma; therefore it is
imperative that the response mirrors His character and redemption. There are several steps a
Pastoral Counselor ought to take when domestic violence is disclosed within the church.
First, the Pastoral Counselor must help establish and provide for safety.26 The victim ought
to be empowered to separate from the abuser, and the physical, emotional and spiritual safety
of her and any children must be always the priority. This can be accomplished by helping her
develop a safety plan for herself and her children, and getting her connected with community
resources that she can reach out to should the abuse happen again.27 Throughout the
intervention, the Pastoral Counselor ought to reassess for safety concerns.
Next, the Pastoral counselor ought to develop a crisis response team dedicated to abuse
intervention within the church.28 A crisis response team may consist of the senior pastor,
pastoral counselor, ministry leaders, small group leader and friends of the abused individual.
Resources outside of the church may consist of social workers, counselors, advocates and
law enforcement. Ideally, a crisis response team will already be in existence before a victim
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comes forward and stands ready to intervene. A clumsy response by the church may place a
victim in further danger, and she may not reach out again.
Crisis Response Team
Abuse intervention is not the work of one person. Therefore, there must be a
comprehensive team of individuals that work together to provide the best care that represents
Christ well to the oppressed. Each member of a church crisis response team serves a specific
purpose and role.
Senior Pastor
The senior pastor is responsible for the entire congregation, being tasked with protecting
and guiding an entire group of individuals.29 It is unrealistic for the lead pastor to be involved
in all aspects of abuse recovery. He ought to be aware of the situation and provide pastoral
care to the victim by checking in occasionally, speaking against domestic abuse from the
pulpit, increasing awareness of domestic abuse, and offering training and materials to the
congregation regarding recognizing and responding to abuse.
Pastoral Counselor
Most senior or lead pastors provide counsel to their congregation. However, most are not
trained counselors, nor can they provide individualized crisis or trauma care to everyone
within the church. Therefore, there is a need for an individual in the church that can provide
individualized pastoral spiritual care to those experiencing the crisis of domestic abuse. The
Pastoral Counselor is responsible for assessing the needs of the victim, organizing
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community resources, providing trauma informed counseling, and coordinating with the rest
if the crisis response team to alleviate the symptoms of trauma in the abuse victim and
family.
Ministry Leaders
The role of ministry leaders is to come alongside the family and provide stability and care in
all areas of the church. Children’s Ministry leaders ought to care for the children, Youth Ministry
leaders ought to care for teenagers, and Men’s and Women’s Ministry leaders ought to disciple
and care for the victim. The abuser also needs care, but it must be done in a way that assures the
victim’s safety. If the abuser attends the same church, all precautions must be taken to provide
safety in the care given.
Friends
Friends are a vitally important component of a crisis response team. Abuse survivors may
struggle with feelings of being unlovable, unworthy, and too broken for God. A friend that sees
them in this brokenness and loves them through it demonstrates the grace and love of Christ to a
soul in desperate need of His healing.
Interventions for the Survivor
Safety
Church leaders and counselors must believe survivors when they come forward. To reach out
for help and not be believed is a secondary form of trauma added to the trauma of abuse. They
must be given space to narrate their stories and recount their trauma in safety.30 The first
intervention, then, is to listen to and believe survivors, and help them peace together their stories
through the art of careful storytelling and the honor of silence in the face of severe trauma.31
Risks are taken when a survivor reaches out for help. Not only must she be believed, but she
must also be assured of her safety and that of any children in the home.32 Church leaders and
counselors ought to be aware of community resources that she can be connected to that will
provide safe housing, transportation, legal services, food and clothing, and job security. If she is
leaving her abuser, they must have protocols in place to assure that she will be safe while on
church property. All individuals involved in her care ought to be aware of any court orders that
pertain to her safety. Her safety should be reevaluated frequently, and adjustments made as
necessary. Trauma recovery is impossible if one continues to feel unsafe.33
Empowerment
Abuse survivors have had their power, agency, and human dignity stripped from them.34
Therefore, the church should come alongside the survivor and help her make her own decisions,
not take over and order her life. It is important that the goals and objectives in counseling an
abuse survivor be made by the survivor in conjunction with the counselor. If the counselor makes
decisions for her, or even appears to be taking control of her life, the survivor may feel
victimized again and powerless in the face of the church.35 She must take back her power and
agency, and learn who she is in Christ, not who her abuser or even her church, tells her to be.
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Referral
Best practices indicate that Pastoral Counseling ought to be short term crisis intervention and
psychological first aid, meant to get people back on track and capable of coping as soon as
possible.36 Domestic abuse will exhaust the resources of the local church if they attempt to
handle it in house. Therefore, counselors ought to be well versed in community resources, and
refer cases to counseling, social workers, case management, and other community organizations
that can assist the survivors long term.
Follow Up
Pastoral care does not end with referral. Pastoral Counselors ought to follow up with survivors
and be aware of how they are progressing. Spiritual care ought to be offered frequently, with the
entire church coming alongside those affected by domestic abuse.
Conclusion
In conclusion, domestic violence is an epidemic in the United States and worldwide. The
Church has a vital and important role in coming alongside secular resources to intervene in cases
of abuse within their congregations. It is possible to intervene in domestic violence cases, and it
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is possible to bring redemption to even the worst cases, through a work of the gospel within the
church community.
Pastoral counselors need to be well equipped for working with the trauma of domestic abuse
and addressing the underlying issues that contribute to it, while providing safety to the survivors.
Churches can become safe places for abuse survivors when they truly love with empathy,
understanding, and stand up for the oppressed within the congregation.
References
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Gezinski, Lindsay B. "Praying Does Not Stop His Fist From Hitting My Face; Religion and and Intimate
Partner Violence." Journal of Family Issues, 2019.
Hambrick, Brad. Becoming a Church that Cares Well for the Abused. Nashville: B&H Publishing Company,
2019.
Kroeger, Catherine Clark. No Place for Abuse; Biblical and Practical Resources to Counteract Domestic
Violence. Downers Grove: Intervarsity Press, 2010.
Langberg, Diane. Suffering and the Heart of God. Greensboro: New Growth Press, 2015.
Martin, Grant. Please Don't Hurt Me. Wheaton: Victor Books, 1987.
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Wright, H. Norman. The Complete Guide to Crisis and Trauma Counseling. Bloomington: Bethany House
Publishers, 2011.
Zust, Barbara L. "Evangelical Christian Pastors' Lived Experience of Counseling Victims/Survivors of
Domestic Violence." 2017.
