DIVORCE: IMPACT ON CHILD 2
Abstract
Divorce has a significant impact on the field of human development as it introduces a massive
change into the life of an adolescent no matter the age. Witnessing the loss of love between
parents, having parents break their marriage commitment, adjusting to going back and forth
between two different households, and the daily absence of one parent while living with the
other, all create a new and challenging family circumstance. When discussing the cognitive,
social, emotional, relationship, and/or moral dimensions of development, researchers contend
that the impact that divorce has on children and adolescents have increased emotional and
behavioral problems, such as underachievement, antisocial behavior, and depression. Given that
divorce is sometimes the best or the only alternative to a troubled marriage and that not every
child of divorce suffers dire consequences, one should consider how to help prevent what is so
often a powerfully negative event in one’s life. Throughout this impact assignment, one will
explore the impact of divorce on children. One will further explore divorce and its
developmental impact, faith, and professional perspectives through a biblical worldview.
DIVORCE: IMPACT ON CHILD 3
Introduction
Divorce is defined as the dissolvement of a marriage. Although it may sound simple, a
divorce is never easy when husband and wife decide to end the holy matrimony. Divorce is even
more difficult to conceptualize when children are involved. Often, parents spend much of their
energy trying to solve marital issues before they conclude to legally part ways, but other times,
they are unsuccessful at fixing marital issues and divorce becomes the best solution. Indeed,
change is a natural part of life, but when it happens to a family and all are affected by it, it is
difficult to deal with. Moreover, divorce relates to the importance to the field of human
development as children and adolescents are affected through cognitive, social, emotional,
relationship, and/or moral dimensions of development. Throughout this impact assignment, one
will explore the impact of divorce on children. One will further explore divorce and its
developmental impact, faith, and professional perspectives through a biblical worldview.
Developmental Impact
According to an article written by author Carl Pickhard, “somewhat different responses to
this painful turn of events occur if the individual is still in childhood or has entered
adolescence. Basically, divorce tends to intensify the child’s dependence and it tends to
accelerate the adolescent’s independence; it often elicits a more regressive response in the
child and a more aggressive response in the adolescent. Moreover, for the young child,
divorce tampers with trust in dependency on parents who now behave in an extremely
undependable way. They surgically divide the family unit into two different households
between which the child must learn to transit back and forth, for a while creating
unfamiliarity, instability, and insecurity. Here, the child is never being able to be with one
parent without having to be apart from the other (Pickhardt, 2011).”
DIVORCE: IMPACT ON CHILD 4
Pickharts article further proposes to the reader that trying to get an adolescent to
understand the permanence of divorce can be hard when intense longing fantasizes that
somehow, mom and dad will be living back together again someday. The adolescent then relies
on wishful thinking to help alleviate the pain of loss, holding onto hope for a parental reunion
much longer than does the adolescent who is quicker to accept the finality of this unwelcomed
family change. Thus, parents who put in a joint presence at special family celebrations and
holiday events to recreate family closeness for the ch8ild only feed the child’s fantasy and delay
his or her adjustment (Pickhardt, 2011).
When assessing the dimensions that affects a child’s development with the worries of
divorce, in infancy, a child’s primary developmental task is to learn how to trust. Within this
stage, children need an abundance of nurture, attention, care, and admiration from both parents
[Hyu15]. As these needs are being met, children respond with eye contact, facial expressions,
gestures, and certain movements. Here, it is important that parents provide consistency within the
child’s environment to adhere to routines while also developing an emotional connection
[Hyu15]. From the time a child is born to six months, it is important that infants have
consistency in caregivers. If an infant’s environment is changed routinely and the people around
them, this should be done gradually to foster a positive rapport in the developmental stage
[Hyu15].
Within 18 months to three years, children in this age group continuously need
consistency in parenting, their environment, caregivers, and routines [Hyu15]. Throughout this
timeframe, they gradually become more independent and begin to test their limits. Here, it is
important to learn about self-control without losing self-esteem and still can learn to deal with
doubt and shame [Hyu15]. As adolescents learn these developmental tasks, they need
DIVORCE: IMPACT ON CHILD 5
reassurance of their parent’s love. At this age, children develop fears of abandonment and are
exacerbated by the turmoil and separation of their parents [Hyu15]. In addition, a parent’s
absence could signify to the child that the parent has disappeared, causing the adolescent to fear
even more. Finally, at this developmental stage, adolescents become concerned with security and
who will care for them. If divorce becomes prevalent within this stage, the dimensions of
bonding of relationships are then interrupted [Hyu15].
At three to five years of age, the developmental tasks for adolescents calls for developing
self-motivation and how to successfully overcome guilt [Hyu15]. Furthermore, adolescents are
tasked with building their own individualized identities. In doing so, adolescents develop
imaginations and fantasies, in which divorce affects these developments greatly as their fears and
fantasies translate into insecurity of their own lovability [Hyu15]. Here, a child may start to
blame the absence of a parent due to their wrongdoing or bad behavior because the child was not
good enough [Hyu15].
From ages six to eight, children are then tasked with achieving a sense of competence
throughout bonding with peers, competing with their peers, and by trusting that their parents will
be there for them [Hyu15]. Here, developmental dimensions involve building friendships,
learning interpersonal and academic skills, and developing morals [Hyu15]. When parents’
divorce when a child takes on the tasks of this developmental stage, they become eager to be
with the absent parent and inquire a strong interest in parental reconciliation. Loyalty conflicts
are then retained due to parents fighting, spousal abuse, and even parents disrespecting each
other [Hyu15].
In children from the ages nine to twelve, children are beginning to recognize the changes
within their identities when they face divorce head on. Their sense of identity is related to what
DIVORCE: IMPACT ON CHILD 6
they perceived as secure. When divorce strikes in this stage, they become confused by the
consequences of it and it then interferes with the things that they depend on the most causing
them to feel powerless and embarrassed [Hyu15].
Between the ages of nine and twelve, loyalty conflicts are not unusual for the adolescent.
In helping the child cope with the factors of divorce, parents may assist at this stage by listening
and not holding the child siding with one parent or the other [Hyu15]. Parent’s may also assist in
this stage by listening to the child’s fears, needs, concerns, and complaints without making
judgements. In addition, parent’s should strongly encourage the adolescent’s relationship with
the other parent [Hyu15].
Lastly, in the child’s teenage years (13-18), adolescents are now transitioning into
adulthood and planning to eventually leaving the nest. Within this stage, it is extremely important
that parents support the child as they accelerate their independence from the family or delay it
because of the divorce [Hyu15].
Faith and Professional Perspectives
From a professional perspective and experience, this learner contends that divorce can be
detrimental to a child and their development as the stress of divorce causes great turmoil. The
impact of divorce has the potential to damage a child’s future relationships, affecting their
cognitive, social, emotional, and moral dimensions in a negative way although divorce may be
the only option. Parent’s must be mindful of scripture text as it speaks against divorce, an oath
that was made before Chris. Luke 16:18 exemplifies this as it states, “Everyone who divorces his
wife and marries another commits adultery, and he who marries a woman divorced from her
DIVORCE: IMPACT ON CHILD 8
References
Broderick, P.C. and Blewitt, P. (2015). The Life Span: Huma Development for Helping
Professionals. Upper Saddle River, New Jersey: Pearson.
Emery, R. E. (2016). How Divorce Affects Children. Retrieved from Emery About Children and
Divorce: http://emeryondivorce.com/how_divorce_affects_children.php
Kim, H. S. (2015). Consequences of Parental Divorce on Development of Cognitive Skills and
Non-Cognitive Traits in Childhood. Retrieved from Princeton University:
paa2010.princeton.edu/papers/101509
Pickhardt, C. E. (2011). The Impact f Divorce on Young Children and Adolescents: Young
children and adolescents can respond differently to divorce. Retrieved from Psychology
Today: https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/surviving-your-childs-
adolescence/201112/the-impact-divorce-young-children-and-adolescents
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