5.1

https://openbooks.library.umass.edu/introwgss/chapter/the-family/

ch.13 attached

ch 14 attached

 

Family units are the most basic units of society. In the families in which we are raised, we learn the rules of society and our place in it. And in a patriarchal society, according to bell hooks and other feminists, if we're not diligent about challenging the messages about hierarchy and dominance that we absorb from the culture--families can be places where we perpetuate those hierarchies and dominant behaviors (and teach them to our children to perpetuate further!). In Chapter 13, hooks diligently points out that because women still perform the majority of child care work in heterosexual couples, women, more often than men, are those who perpetuate patriarchal dominance behaviors by teaching them to their children.

The reading by Kang et al points out that the nuclear family, or North America's version of this, the SNAF (Standard North American Family), is treated as the norm--perhaps even the ideal in our culture. In case you're unfamiliar with the term, "nuclear family" refers to a family unit that consists of mom, dad, and some kids. Notice how heteronormative it is; same-sex couples are excluded from this ideal. And what about single-parent families? Families with no children? Families with more than two adult family members and multiple generations living under one roof? Why does our culture consider this type of family the "norm" or perhaps even an ideal that many of us grow up to strive for?

Consider the history of marriage in the U.S.. Reach way back to first wave feminism. Remember when women were fighting just to gain basic citizenship rights--to be seen as people in the eyes of the law? Before the advancements made by first-wave feminists, women in the West were essentially the property of their fathers before becoming property of their husbands. To this day, it's still common for fathers to "give away" their daughters at their weddings. How can someone "give" something (/someone) unless he owns it? Consider, also, the tradition of brides wearing white at their weddings--a symbol of purity, of the promise that the woman's virginity is something whose ownership is passed from father to husband.

In the reading by Kang et al, the authors argue that this tradition of marriage was specific to white, middle class women. While this is largely true, they are simplifying this history, which is, of course, much more complex. For example, many cultures throughout the world favor a family structure in which women are primarily relegated to private sphere of the home, and many of these cultural practices are brought to the U.S. via immigration. It's important not to leave this out this factor in discussing the roots of gender expectations within families.

Optional: For a larger perspective and a look further back into history, watch the video below about the history of marriage:

https://youtu.be/ZZZ6QB5TSfk

 

So, the institution of marriage has a long history in which marriage hasn't always had women's best interests in mind.

Even now, in a heterosexual couple, the man and the woman are not experiencing the relationship in the same way as their partner. For one, even though circumstances of modern life require that both partners work outside the home in most couples, women still come home and do the vast majority of the childcare and housework. This is sometimes called the second shift, because it's like a second, unpaid job that most women perform when they come home from their paid job. The fact that women often do this unpaid labor comes from a history of white femininity as a standard for "womanhood," as you read in the chapter by Kang et al. This is called a gendered division of labor. This gender divide can contribute to perpetuating separate spheres, or the idea that men "should" inhabit the public sphere outside the home and women "should" inhabit the private sphere within the home.

Watch this video in which Arlie Hochschild, the woman who coined the term "second shift," explains this concept further:

https://youtu.be/mvzE6zYkEQY

 

Unless couples make a conscious choice to split housework and become equal partners, usually women default to doing most of this unpaid work.

This is mostly due to socialization, but it's also due to the fact that men tend to earn more--remember that gender pay gap you hear about so often? And because our culture tends to repeat hierarchical structures, even in same-sex couples, the person who earns less tends to do most of the unpaid work.

In their textbook, Gendered Voices, Feminist Visions, Shaw and Lee describe three marriage models that sum up the power structures within marriage models/marriage and partnership. They describe three models, the traditional "head-complement" (one breadwinner and one who stays at home and offers support--childcare, housework, and emotional support), the "junior partner-senior partner model" (both partners work, but the one who earns more tends to have more power, and their job is considered more important; if one person has to miss work or even quit work for family obligations, it is usually the junior partner, who is usually the woman in hetero couples; the junior partner usually does more housework, regardless of how many hours they work. This is the most common marriage model at present.), and the "equal partners" model (both partners agree to share housework equally and value both of their jobs equally, regardless of each partner's income). You can read more about this hereLinks to an external site.. Consider what would happen to these couples in the case of divorce. In the head-complement and junior partner-senior partner couples, the "complement" and "junior partner" usually struggle financially after divorce; they haven't been able to build their career in the same way as their partners. This can create a dynamic of dependence and control within the marriage/romantic partnership.

 

These readings cover a lot, so I'll give you a few options for how to respond. Please respond with at least 200 words. Choose one of the options below:

1. Consider the structure of your own family. Who does most of the unpaid work at home? Is there a gendered division of labor within your household? Is there a division based on income? What do you think about this? Connect your experience to one of the readings.
   • A note: Just because a person of one gender does certain chores and a person of another gender does other chores does not alone make this a gendered division of labor. A gendered division of labor refers to when individuals are required or expected to perform certain tasks because of their gender. For example, for a period of time in my past, I was living with a (male) partner who was working and I was not; I did most of the housework for that time, because I wasn't employed and I had time; if he'd been unemployed while I was working, he would have done most of the housework. This is not a gendered division of labor. When I was a child, I washed the dishes and my brother mowed the lawn because my parents thought that girls should do housework and boys should do yard work. This is an example of a gendered division of labor.
2. Comment on hooks's discussion of marriage and partnership in Chapter 14. Include a quote from hooks to make it clear what you're commenting on.
3. If you have children: Are you attempting to engage in feminist parenting, as discussed by hooks? (If the answer is no, choose a different question to answer for this assignment.) Explain what that looks like in your family, and connect your discussion with a quote from chapter 13 of Feminism is for Everybody. You may want to refer to other course materials as well.
4. If you plan to have children in the future: How will you engage in feminist parenting? (If you don't plan to do this, choose a different question to answer for this assignment.) Explain, and connect your discussion with a quote from chapter 13 of Feminism is for Everybody. You may want to refer to other course materials as well.
5. Choose a key idea from the chapter from Kang et al and comment on it. For example, the concepts chosen families, separate spheres, or the cult of domesticity. Include a quote from the reading in your discussion.