Couple Analysis for the Michelle and Donald.
Background Information for the Couple
The background information for the couple will be examined in this analysis. The
analysis will cover many topics such as the couple’s age, educational background,
employment, birth order, how long they have known each other, and how the family feels
about their marriage. Having a basic understanding of this information is important when
analyzing a couple. This couple is similar in age. Michelle is 26 years old, and Donald is 29
years old. Because they are similar in age, they have a similar level of maturity. Economically,
they are a part of the upper middle class, with both individuals working full-time jobs. Donald
is an Officer in the Navy, and Michelle is a Registered Nurse. Academically, they are both
holders of bachelor's and master's degrees. They believe that education is the key to success in
their career fields. Donald was born in New Jersey in a two-parent household, and Michelle is
from North Carolina under a single-parent household. Michelle primarily lived with her
mother and her father during the summer. Their family loves that they are finally taking the
next step by getting married. Their families have gotten to know each other very well, so
getting married will make their union official.
Couple Type
After the assessment, the couple has a conventional type of relationship. Both believe
that man should lead their family with the guidance of Christ. Their family dynamic has a
blend of what you may notice in couples of this generation. Both individuals have a strong
faith in Christ. This belief allows the couple to have a shared understanding of what they hold
valuable. The couple has minor differences on a certain topic, but having the shared belief
prevents them from committing any acts of sin toward one another. When they disagree, they
can resolve their issues through collaborative thinking until they are both satisfied with the
result. They have been in a relationship since college, so they have developed the longevity to
encounter and overcome many obstacles. They are fully aware that they will continue to
encounter challenges together throughout their lifetime, but as long as they stay true to Jesus
Christ, everything will work out. Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is
not arrogant or rude. 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 states, “It does not insist on its own way; it is not
irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears
all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.” Patience is a virtue they
hold dearly in their relationship.
Possible Strengths and Growths Areas
Like many couples, they all possess strengths and areas where they can develop.
Working professionals have moments when they feel that they have to shift priorities from one
another to their careers. The shift in priorities produces conflict at times when one feels
neglected. When one thinks they are being neglected, they have learned to vocalize how that
emotionally affects them. Since they shared the same faith in Christ, it has been easier to seek
scripture guidance. Scripture reminds them how they should treat one another as husband and
wife. Having a moderate level of maturity and longevity gave them the ability to reflect on how
they may have acted during disagreements, which has enhanced their ability to communicate
with one another in the future. The understanding is that growing as individuals is important
because it impacts how they grow together in their relationship. They both have to type A
personalities and know they can sometimes become difficult. They both agreed that they had to
take many breaks early in their relationship because they had consistent tense conflicts. Due to
their love for one another, it became more accessible and easier for them to accept when they
misbehaved toward one another after tense conflicts. An issue that may arise in the future may
occur once they are parents. Having children can impact how you treat each other in times of
stress. It is important to develop ways to properly communicate to prevent the possibility of
verbal abuse from occurring in the future.
Circumplex Model/Family Map
This family map shows the degree of connectedness and flexibility of the couple’s
family of origin. As previously mentioned, Michelle and Donald are from two different places
and grew up under different family dynamics. Before having their children, they want to work
on strengthening their relationship with each other's family members. They both understand
the importance of having a healthy family dynamic before introducing a child into this world.
Being raised in a two-parent household, Donald knows it is vital for both parents to raise a
child. Being raised in a single-parent household, Michelle admitted that she had a lot of
learning regarding their relationship dynamics. Michelle has an independent mindset, so it
took some time for her to become open to Donald. Donald’s parents are similar in age and are
willing to retire and spend their days at an elderly retirement resort, while Michelle’s mother
does not want to live away from family in her old age. Michelle wants her mom to live with
them once she becomes too ill to care for herself. Donald agrees that her mother should have
lived with them when her mother once her mother is unable to live by herself safely. Donald
wants certain financial stability before caring for their family members.
Scope Personality Scale
There are various reasons why some relationships do not work out in the end. Having
the couples complete an assessment can help them recognize areas in their relationship that
may benefit from additional effort. The Scope Personality Scale makes it apparent what areas
are compatible. Any incompatibilities will be discussed by offering supportive feedback.1 The
scale discussed on the SCOPE personality scale is Emotional Steady/Stability. Having an
emotionally stable relationship enhances the couple’s attraction to each other.2 Based on the
report, Donald is perceived to be more emotionally stable than Michelle. The report does not
suggest that Michelle is not emotionally stable, but when compared to Donald, more
development is needed. Donald may be more emotionally stable than Michelle due to their
community upbringing. This may present a problem later in the future, but as long as they are
aware of their mishappens, working on developing the couples’ emotional stability can only
improve the relationship.
Conclusion
Couple’s analysis will make the couples aware of areas in their life they already knew they
were doing well, but also helps them develop in areas they are weak. The couples that have
successful marriages tend to make an effort in areas that need development. Progress is only
obtained through constant effort. The differences between the couples can hinder their growth and
enhance their relationship's satisfaction. 2 Corinthians 6:14 states, “Do not be unequally yoked
with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has
light with darkness?” The couple in this analysis had a few differences, but one of the most
important aspects of their relationship that they had in common was their faith in the Lord and
Savior, Jesus Christ. With Christ as your Savior, they will live righteously and treat each other
respectfully as scripture requested in the Bible. With God on their side, there’s nothing they can
not other come in their relationship as they prepare for their union to become one. Based on the
1 Charles Kollar, Solution-focused pastoral counseling: An effective short-term approach for getting people back on
track, (Grand Rapids, Mich Zondervan, 2011): 157
2 Jeffrey A. Simpson, “The Dissolution of Romantic Relationships: Factors Involved in Relationship Stability and
Emotional Distress,”KJournal of personality and social psychologyK53, no. 4 (1987): 684.
Kollar, Charles. Solution-focused pastoral counseling: An effective short-term approach for
getting people back on track. Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan, 2011.
Simpson, Jeffry A. “The Dissolution of Romantic Relationships: Factors Involved in Relationship
Stability and Emotional Distress.”KJournal of personality and social psychology.K53, no. 4
(1987): 683–692.
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