PRACTICAL BOOK REVIEW 1
Practical Book Review: The Me I Want to Be
Student Name
School of Behavioral Sciences, Liberty University
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satisfactory “So What?!” and points out how a fellow-PACOneer pictured the development of the
“Me I Want to Become”. Though several mechanical writing errors precluded a perfect score,
this student earned a satisfactory grade. NOTE: this submission was not a patch work project
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Summary
The Me I Want to Be by John Ortberg (2010) is a compelling call to the Christian to return
to deep communion with God. Ortberg reminds, and perhaps in some cases teaches, that the call
of God is not for service but for relationship. He writes, “The most important task of your life is
not what you do, but who you become” (p. 13). The believer does not have to recreate
themselves and follow a list of steps to become “The Me I Want to Be” but instead they must
accept themselves as God’s unique creation created with gifts and talents that God can use. To be
that unique creation, a believer must let go of the image they hold of themselves and look to God
to find their true self. God wants his people to surrender to him and allow the flow of the Spirit
to operate in their lives. Ortberg (ch. 6) puts out the idea that Christians want a harder way led
by effort and rules and laws which is opposed to God’s plan for a softer way that allows the Sprit
to work and flow in believers.
Part of allowing the Spirit to flow is recognizing the personal temperament, gifts, talents
and desires a person holds and allowing God to direct through these. It is also important to
recognize that all of life is open before God and each activity and relationship is a place to serve
and honor God. When a person is living in this flow they can monitor their thoughts and
recognize when they are stepping into control. Dreaming big and looking for what excites and
brings a person to God is how they can live a softer way. It is necessary to surrender to God’s
will and design in our lives. Our thoughts can turn from negativity to excellence when we
surrender them to God.
Ortberg’s book gives some practical advice for living the softer way. Reading, loving and
memorizing Scripture will fill a believer’s mind with excellence. Tell Jesus about all worries and
anxious thoughts. Recognize God’s constant presence and his willingness to give peace in all
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circumstances. Monitoring soul satisfaction will help prevent temptation. Recognize and confess
sin quickly. Take time to be alone with God and relish in his presence. Create and care for
meaningful relationships with other people. As a “So-What?!” perhaps Ortberg’s greatest
advice is to dream big. “Living the adventure God planned, becoming the person God created
you to be, is not one pursuit among many. It is why you were born. It is worth wanting above all
else” (p. 252). In sum, this timely read noticeably reinforces the notion that growing in favor
with God and others is a life-changing adventure for the believer who aspires to be and become
more like Christ in every relational context!
Respond
Ortberg (2010) repeatedly used the phrase, “Try softer”. This phrase resounded very
loudly in my spirit. It is what God has been telling me for several years. In the “Me I See Now”
I recognize that I worry. Ortberg states it perfectly, “Toxic anxiety, however, causes our
negative, self-defeating, and persistent thoughts to keep cycling over the same ground. Instead
of prompting us to take action, they paralyze us” (p. 121). This is often how I live. I am doing
what I need to do throughout the day but my mind is running over problems and issues and
worries and those thoughts are toxic, draining and fear based. An example is over school work.
I finished my bachelor’s online through Lee University and started my masters at Liberty last
fall. Every single assignment has been done on time or early, all my grades have been A’s and
yet for every new class and assignment I worry. I fret over the details and the directions and my
writing and worry about if I can get everything done in time to get the kids and make dinner and
on and on it goes. My internal conversation does exactly what Ortberg states, it paralyzes me.
When I stop and look at the conversation it is obviously a lie. I know that I am capable and I
have proof through my grades and the knowledge I have gained. I know that I am doing what
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God called me to do and he will bring me through. So, the question that comes to mind is, “Is
why do I worry?” The answer is that it is a way of life for me and it is sinful. I worry about
everything. I focus on the negative. I know that those behaviors are detrimental to my spirit and
so I work hard to keep them inside and smile and say the right things. The effort can be
exhausting some days. All my attempts to force new thoughts are not going to make a difference
unless I am willing to do as Ortberg writes and surrender and allow God to lead me to try softer.
The “Me I See Now” needs to breathe!
Reflect
I absolutely have been moved by this book. My notes are covered with “Try softer”
beside most every note. I would like to share two snippets of Ortberg’s writing and what my
response was to them.
Ortberg – “ …but we cannot make ourselves desire God more by telling ourselves that we
should. God is so gracious and patient, wanting us to want him, that he is willing to work with
this kind of honesty” (p. 81).
Me – My desire for God is bound in what I think I should do instead of being with him and in his
presence. I can tell others how much God loves them as they are but I must set a different
standard in my own thinking about myself.
Ortberg – “What freed him from panic and fear was not trying hard to quit thinking fearful
thoughts. It was listening to another voice” (p. 97).
Me – The softer way! I can be honest about my thoughts and ask Holy Spirit what his response
is.
I know that I have the gift of faith. I can hear the Spirit and respond in the big things but
my struggle is in the day to day walking out the small steps that big vision requires. I answered
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the call to foster and adopt behavioral needs children. I answered the call to return to school
because I have a vision of the church helping traumatized children with the truth of God’s
healing. These are big visions that require faith. God did not call me to these and then leave me
to handle the details. He wants to celebrate each day with me and teach me to have that same
faith in the details that I have in the big picture. The “Me I Want to See SOON” is thinking what
she is saying and not expending effort to keep her real thoughts hidden. The “Me I Want to See
SOON” is connected to the Spirit and living in faith through each thought flowing through my
mind. Under the influence of my Guiding Purpose Statement, I will seeking to be an example of
Christ, I am committed to become a peace-filled woman in every relational context.
Act
I have all the resources I need to act. For me to become the “Me I Want to Be Soon” I
must surrender. I walked through many areas of repentance while reading Ortberg’s text. This
book was the “right time and right place” for me where I currently am in my spiritual journey. I
have had many ups and downs in my attempt to live out 1 Corinthians 10:5 (NIV) We demolish
arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and
weOtakeOcaptiveOeveryOthoughtOto make it obedient to Christ. Somewhere over these last few years
I just gave up trying and kept busy doing the work that I felt called too. My negative thinking
turned against me and old habits returned that allowed me to blame myself and believe that I was
incapable of correcting this flaw in my personality. This book was not new information, it was
old information that God has been speaking to me from the day accepted Jesus as my Savior.
Yet, somehow it clicked and brought together many of the separate messages I have heard from
God. Most of the practical advice that Ortberg gives I have tried in one form or another. The
phrase that has jumped out of this book and grabbed a hold of my Spirit is “Try softer”.
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The small measurable steps that I will take now to secure and support “Becoming the
Me I Want to Be Soon” include: 1. Stepping back from a task that I am feeling overwhelmed at.
2. Evaluate my current thinking. 3. Ask God for his thoughts about me and/or the task at hand. 4.
If I do not hear a response I will quote memorized Scripture to myself until I have calmed down
and can feel at peace. 5. Repeat as necessary. This strategy will help me to find the peace in his
presence that I need in order to be the woman that God has created me to be.
