4 MAT BOOK REVIEW: FAMILY TO FAMILY
Jim Orbe
EVAN 525: Contemporary Evangelism
October 9, 2022
Contents
Abstract………………………………………………………………………………………..1
Concrete Response..…………………………………………………………………………...2
Reflection……..…………………...…………………………………………………………..3
Action……………..………………………………………………………………….………..4
Bibliography………………………………………………….………………………………..7
ii
1
Abstract
In their book Family to Family, authors Pipes and Lee go through six short but sweet
chapters that focus on spiritually-centered themes surrounding the household and how simple
changes to how the family and its members relate to each other can bring meaningful
relationships horizontally and vertically. The volume cleverly skips the traditional
psychoanalysis trap with the conventional limitation of “how-tos” that most books dealing with
marital and parental relationships gravitate to; instead, the authors approach the perennial issues
with a focus on biblical guidelines coupled with practical strategies that are highly applicable to
day-to-day living.
The book begins by introducing what it is all about and what it is for—dedicated to the
“hurried parents who deeply desire meaningful family time, true significance, and long to pass
the baton of their faith in Christ on to their children.”1 While it establishes that aim, it also carves
out what it does not intend to do and offers timely advice to its readers; it “is not a quick fix—
however, discovering and experiencing God’s best and passing your faith in Christ on to your
children is worth the sacrifice.”2
Through the following six chapters, the book breaks down the essence of leaving a
lasting legacy by defining (1)Healthy Families and how it look like in real life; it also
recommends (2)Developing a Mission Statement that will serve as the family’s centerline when
life goes foggy. It then proceeds to the crux of the matter by detailing the dynamics of (3)Passing
the Baton of faith in Christ on to the next generation. Chapters 4 and 5 take the topic outside the
immediate scope of the family and into the World and the Church as evangelism in various forms
and shapes, and ministries. Finally, chapter (6)Sharing the Message brings home the point of
1 Jerry Pipes and Victor Lee, Family to Family: Families Making a Difference (Wordsearch, 2018), 1.
2 Ibid., 4.
2
effectively communicating the gospel to every person and household that a healthy family will
come in contact with. This final segment deals with the significant role that prayer and the Holy
Spirit play in evangelism. It drives home the entire purpose of the book with these words, “The
bottom line is sharing the way of salvation through Jesus Christ. That is what this book is all
about: Raising your family to follow Christ.”3
Concrete Response
Of the six chapters in the book, the practical approach to mentoring and discipling my
own children discussed in chapter 3 appeals to my senses the most. Being the father of three
growing boys, I feel the impact of the message of this section of the book. I am reminded of the
great responsibility God has given to parents. Nowadays, I find myself so busy going about life’s
routine. In my pursuit of sharing the Good News with the sphere of my influence at work, in
church, and in the community, I have overlooked the immediate space I am supposed to take care
of in the first place. Unknowingly, I have taken this responsibility for granted and relied on the
children’s division of the church and its able teachers, even relatives or next of kin to “take care
of my kids’ spirituality and discipline. Right off the bat in this third chapter, in the first
paragraph, a stinging reminder hit me, “It is not the church’s sole responsibility—or anyone
else’s—to win your children to Christ and mentor them spiritually; it is yours.”4
I have preoccupied myself with Bible studies, servant evangelism and church ministries,
thinking I am doing my part in sharing the gospel. And although I have not completely neglected
my kids in their physical and spiritual needs, I was enlightened by this book to look more closely
at how I am mentoring my boys toward knowing the God I serve and love. The real-world
method embedded in the principles of “Sharing Jesus with Teens” and “Key Elements of
3 Pipes and Lee, Family to Family, 114.
4 Ibid., 43.
3
Mentoring” offer valuable and timely insights that I can readily add to my knowledge base as I
seek to influence my children in their own personal walk with Jesus.
As I prepare to be the Lord’s instrument in ministry, I ponder upon the impact of these
learnings on who I am now, not only as a providing parent to my boys but more importantly as
their friend and model. Being there for them is critical if they were to find a legacy worthy of
continuing in their generation and beyond. Affirming them, praying with and for them, being
transparent, empowering them, and most of all making the Bible central to what I do are lasting
principles that should find their place every day for the rest of our lives together.
Reflection
The books deals quite thoroughly on the subject of family relations, ministry and
evangelism. There is not much to add to it in terms of practicality and application. Although the
book briefly mentioned here and there the reality of single parenthood, the authors should have
allotted more space and discussion on this specific subject matter. Our postmodern society
reveals more and more prevalence of this situation in American households that it warrants the
proper treatment of the issues confronting this particular demographic and how they too,
incapacitated in certain ways, can still be effective parents and thus leaders of the family, albeit
less-than-ideal and incomplete.
For instance, in a single-parent family, the lack of resources, income, and time poses a
challenge to the practical methodology offered in each of the six chapters of the book. The
potential bearing on the principles presented in various sections of the volume may or may not be
significant but the authors could have asked relevant questions pertaining to the solutions that
may help alleviate the concerns of those who are living in those situations. The sometimes
unspeakable fear, shame, and guilt usually associated with circumstances preceding and/or
4
following such settings would have been a ripe topic for the scope of the book. Questions such
as, “How can single parents overcome the additional challenges of loneliness and struggles
native to their situation while achieving and maintaining a healthy family?”
Moreover, in the same breath and discussion, the authors could have tied in this particular
topic to the ministries mentioned in chapters 4 and 5 and integrate principles by which traditional
families can help and minister to the needs of single-parent households. Obviously, no book is
perfectly complete in scope and material covered, but the prevailing trend in our society today
demands a closer look at how God can still turn around a less-than-optimal family situation and
use it for His glory.
Action
The book’s format of encapsulating each chapter’s key points and suggesting steps to
making it yours easily allowed me to identify three action plans I intend to carry out as I prepare
for the ministry in the long term. In the short term, these action plans can also be implemented as
I strive, by God’s grace to practice the principles of heaven in the here and now.
First, realizing the attack of the adversary against the family is existent now more than
ever, I will immediately adjust my routine for the purpose of spending quantity and quality time
with my three boys. This will involve a conscious effort on my part to not just maintain our once-
a-week playtime at the court, pool, or ballpark but the quality of bonding these times afford. To
keep this goal measurable, I will note that every week from hereon will be progressively
monitored for changes in routine with varying frequencies and length of time spent with each
child. My goal is not just to be there for them but to incorporate tidbits of the gospel in our
conversations so as to inculcate in their minds the discipline of a life in Christ.
5
Second, real, interesting, and lively family worship needs to be brought back into the
fold. This important aspect of our spiritual lives as a family has been taken for granted and
neglected over the years. The distractions of life have contributed to a hurried state in our
household that eventually pushed out this practice and discipline. Starting next week, we will
begin a simple yet interesting family worship routine. The kids will take turns leading out in
prayer, singing, reading, and sharing.
I am done neglecting the family altar and as the authors wrote, “Family worship can be a
great blessing or a great downer, depending on how it is handled. But it must be handled. Born-
again parents cannot have an on-mission family without regular time together reviewing the
Word and relating its principles to everyday life.”5 To make this plan sustainable, I will ask each
child to keep track of our schedule and make sure we allot at least thrice a week for this and
reward them accordingly if they stay true to their responsibility.
Third, I will suggest to my couples’ Bible study group to use this material in our weekly
meetings starting this coming winter. I will propose that we cover at least one chapter a week
over the next six weeks, assigning a different couple each time to lead out in the discussion of
each chapter. This is a great resource not only for family relationships, and character building,
but more importantly, evangelism as a family which is something that I feel is lacking in our
group. Like my other groups, the emphasis over the last twelve months has been Bible study and
prayer. Not that there is anything wrong with that, but without the thrust in evangelism and
discipleship, our efforts are limited to personal and individual needs rather than the Great
Commission and spreading and making disciples everywhere.
As I prepare for this plan, I will research on the additional resources mentioned in the
book through the end of each chapter. I will also be preselecting key questions and suggested
5 Pipes and Lee, Family to Family, 59.
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family applications, trimming them down to one or two to keep the discussions succinct yet
interesting. This way, I will be aiding each leading couple every week to streamline their
program to cater to livelier discussions and meaningful interactions. My prayer and goal is that
each family represented in that group will, as the authors expressed, “Respond to the call. Join
God in His redemptive purposes. Ask God to reveal His dream for your family. Take your family
back from the world and pass the baton of your living faith in Jesus Christ to future generations.
Be an on-mission family that lives the great commandments and fulfills the Great Commission.”6
6 Pipes and Lee, Family to Family, 121.
