The free model is very extensive in covers a lot of ground regarding couples and how to
intervene in a moment of unforgiveness. After looking through the materials and rereading
certain sections it's a healthy amount of information to process and going through it all is at
moments confusing but very beneficial. The free model covers methods and steps to deal with
irrational feelings and thoughts within the relationship not necessarily negative thoughts but
thoughts that can hinder the growth and development; Such as unforgiveness, rumination in
general and lack of expression when there is an emotion present for one partner and maybe not
the other. Being able to go through these feelings the free model encourages the couples to go
through steps and methods in order to express themselves without causing severe catastrophic or
collateral damage to the relationship. Often in the book the author mentioned repeating certain
steps and acknowledging that with the free model each couple will vary in their response and not
everyone in the relationship will be able to move forward so freely some may need to suspend
themselves in a certain step before they can move forward and create progress. The overall
general concept of the free model is forgiveness, reaching a place where the relationship can
finally move forward and there is a positive conversation related to grievances. One of the
models that stood out when I was reading through the material was the concept of seeing the act
of forgiveness as a part of one's individual faith and spirituality. Tying in the ability to seek
forgiveness and offer forgiveness is embedded within the culture of Christianity, this was very
important but also I found that in some cultures they don't practice this same level of forgiveness
in their faith so in that it may have its boundaries regarding other denominations. However, one
model that I did find was versatile was the reach forgiveness steps. These steps appeared to
provide levels for the relationship to experience in order to reach a place where there is an
emotional forgiveness. Personally, I cannot at this point be assured that this is material I would
use in totality in couples therapy. However based on some of the techniques and methods I do
see that there are benefits to following the individual for giving his model in couples counseling
for new relationships those seeking to get married and those who have just experienced an
intrusion in the security and sanctity of their marriage. In a article by “McCullough, Bellah,
Kilpatrick & Johnson, J. L. (2001)”, the process of transitioning from offense to reconciliation is
a process that works with motivational factors. Motivating the couple with the REACH model,
which is recall the event, empathize with the offender, altruistic gift, commit to forgive, hold on
to forgiveness. This step has very powerful potential, it addresses many needs presented in a
conflict, and it starts with acknowledgment and ends with action. This step could be used in
situations extending beyond marital conflict but in general it could be used in longstanding
friendships where there is a reason to believe that there is a betrayal of trust.
McCullough, M. E., Bellah, C. G., Kilpatrick, S. D., & Johnson, J. L. (2001). Vengefulness:
Relationships with Forgiveness, Rumination, Well-Being, and the Big Five. Personality
and Social Psychology Bulletin, 27(5), 601–610.
https://doi.org/10.1177/0146167201275008
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