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Responses and Whys
Student
Institution
Course
Instructor
Date
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Responses and Whys
Responses for DAY 3
Part I
Message to Coworker
Hi Jane
You are just you still interested in helping with the initiative? We're having a meeting this Friday
at 10 AM and would love for you to join us. Let me know if you can make it!
Thanks,
[Your Name]
Message to Staff Member
Hi Mr James,
I'm following up to see if you're still on board with helping out with the initiative. Our meeting is
scheduled for this Friday at 10 AM, and your participation would be precious. Can you confirm
your attendance?
Thanks,
[Your Name]
Part II
In crafting these messages, I adjusted the tone to suit the relationship and roles between the
sender (myself) and the recipients. I maintained a collegial and informal tone for the message to
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my coworkers, reflecting our equal standing in the organization. The phrase "Just checking in"
conveys a casual approach appropriate for a peer-to-peer interaction. According to Guffey and
Loewy (2015), maintaining a professional yet approachable communication tone with colleagues
helps foster a collaborative environment. "would love for you to join us" is inviting without
being overly authoritative and suitable for someone who is not a direct report.
In contrast, the message to the staff member who reports to me is slightly more formal and
directive. Using "I wanted to follow up" introduces the message with a sense of continuity and
accountability, aligning with a supervisory role. The confirmation request ("Can you confirm
your attendance?") adds a layer of formality and expectation, which is appropriate when
communicating with someone who is expected to comply with directives. This aligns with the
principle of clarity in communication emphasized by Bovee and Thill (2018), ensuring that
expectations are communicated to subordinates.
By tailoring the tone and structure of each message, I aimed to respect the different dynamics
and expectations inherent in each professional relationship.
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Responses for DAY 5
Classmate 1
Original Message
Hey Mrs. George,
Are you available to give some time on Friday to discuss the initiative? Let me know!
Thanks,
James
Revised Message
Dear Mrs. George,
I hope this message reaches you in good health. Can you meet on Friday to discuss the initiative?
I would love to hear from you and any advice you wish to give me. Please let me know if this
slot is convenient for you.
Thank you,
James.
Rationale
The original message needs to reflect proper etiquette for a person like a supervisor who
appreciates order. The changes introduced in the new message include replacing the informal
greeting ("Hey") with the formal one – "Dear" and using the polite question "I hope this message
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finds you well"). The request is formally and politely phrased, and there is an acknowledgement
of the supervisor's expertise in the matter ("Any advice from you would be immensely helpful").
This is based on Bovee and Thill's (2018) professional communication, specifically regarding
upward communication, where the writers must adhere to formal communication and show
respect to the managers.
Classmate 2
Original Message
Hi Mrs. George
Can we discuss the initiative on Friday? Kindly tell me what time suits you best.
Thanks,
Joseph
Revised Message
Dear Mrs. Gearge
I am writing to request a Friday meeting to discuss the initiative. Is it possible for you to let me
know when it will be convenient for you? Your input will be valuable in showing our progress.
I appreciate your consideration of my request.
Joseph
Rationale
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While polite, the original message containing overly informal language could be more than
writing to the supervisor. The revised message includes a formal greeting and a less assertive
tone to the request ('May I kindly ask when it would be good for you?'). It makes a supervisor
feel useful, and this is a powerful way to remind everyone about a supervisor's value since they
are experts as well: "Your contribution will be highly valuable to furthering our work." This
adjustment is proper based on the advice provided by Guffey and Loewy (2015) on How to
Communicate Professionally in the Workplace, especially when writing to the higher up.
