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Elements for Successful Parent-Professional Collaboration: The Fundamental Things Apply
As Time Goes By
Patricia H. Sheehey
Patrick E. Sheehey
A Case Story Published in
TEACHING Exceptional Children Plus
Volume 4, Issue 2, November 2007
Copyright © 2007 by the author. This work is licensed to the public under the Creative Commons Attri-
bution License
Elements for Successful Parent-Professional
Collaboration: The Fundamental Things Apply
As Time Goes By
Patricia H. Sheehey Patrick E. Shehey
Abstract
Abstract The Individuals with Disabilities Education Act (IDEA) mandates parent-professional
collaboration. But difficulties between parent and professional collaboration seem to persist.
These difficulties do not seem to be related to a lack of mutual respect or lack of good intentions.
Perhaps difficulties exist because of a lack of common ground. Professionals’ thinking is
grounded in theory from personnel preparation and on-the-job experiences. Parents’ thinking is
grounded in personal experiences and information from professionals, other parents, technology,
and media. This article describes a mother’s and father’s experiences over the past 25 years in a
variety of settings as the parents of a child with severe disabilities and as special education pro-
fessionals. They present their experiences in special education as parents and provide suggestions
for parents and professionals to develop an effective collaborative relationship.
Keywords Collaboration, parent involvement, family involvement, parent-professional collaboration
SUGGESTED CITATION:
Sheehey, P. H., & Sheehey, P. E. (2007). Elements for successful parent-professional collabora- tion: The fundamental things apply as time goes by. TEACHING Exceptional Children Plus, 4(2)
Article 3. Retrieved [date] from http://escholarship.bc.edu/education/tecplus/vol4/iss2/art3
Acknowledgments:
We would like to thank our son, Tom. If it weren't for him we would not have
had the array of experiences to share with other families and professionals. We would
also like to thank Dr. Linda McCormick for her help in preparing the manuscript and
Dr. Garnett Smith for his creative title..
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2!
The Individuals with Disabilities Edu-
cation Act (IDEA) mandates parent-
professional collaboration. Collaboration, de-
fined as working or acting together is a rela-
tively straightforward concept. Why is it so
difficult to accomplish where parents and pro-
fessionals are concerned?
The difficulties surrounding collabora-
tion in the educational arena do not seem to
be related to lack of mutual respect or lack of
good intentions. Our experiences over the
past 25 years in a variety of settings as the
parents of a child with severe disabilities and
as special education professionals lead us to
believe that parents and professionals sin-
cerely respect one another and that they genu-
inely want an effective collaborative relation-
ship.
The problem would seem
to be lack of common ground.
Parents and professionals have
difficulty establishing a level of
collaboration that will benefit the
child because they are coming
from very different places. Pro-
fessionals’ thinking is grounded
in theory acquired from years of
personnel preparation and accu-
mulated experiences. The thinking
of parents is grounded in personal experi-
ences with their child and whatever informa-
tion they have been able to glean from profes-
sionals, other parents, the internet, and the
media.
We feel that our experiences as par-
ents of a child with severe disabilities are
fairly typical. Our son, Tom, was born in
1976. He began receiving special education
services in 1977 in an infant program. Special
education services ended in 1996 when he
became 20 years old. We have also been pro-
fessionals (teachers) in the field of special
education for over ten years. We have experi-
enced collaboration as parents and as profes-
sionals. Some of our efforts at collaboration
have been positive and some have been
abysmal failures. The purpose of this article is
to share our successes and our failures and
provide suggestions. We hope that our sug-
gestions can facilitate successful collabora-
tion between parents and professionals (see
Table 1).
Throughout the years we attended
countless meetings with professionals regard-
ing Tom’s health and educational needs. The
picture of exasperated professionals review-
ing Tom’s large files is one of our most vivid
memories. For nearly 20 years our family was
eligible for free lunches, low-income housing,
and state funded medical plans. Tom received
Social Security Supplemental Income (SSI)
because of our family’s low in-
come. We remember waiting for
hours at various departments of
social services and the “looks”
from others when using state
medical cards or food stamps.
Without Tom’s teacher we
wouldn’t have known about SSI.
She shared information regarding
SSI to assist us economically and
to ensure that he had medical cover-
age. She also informed us of our legal rights
and helped us advocate for transportation and
other resources.
Play It Again, Sam
Parents want information (Turnbull,
Turnbull, Erwin, & Soodak, 2006) and they
need it to be repeated over and over because
they sometimes stop listening when a piece of
information is especially painful or difficult
to comprehend. It is important for parents to
keep asking! Request that information be
provided in language you can understand and
continue asking until you have the informa-
!
3!
Parents and
professionals
have difficulty
establishing a
level of
collaboration.
tion you need. When it is difficult to directly
ask for what you need, find a family member,
friend, or agency who will intercede for you.
Professionals should not wait to be
asked. They should provide assistance with
advocacy, locating resources, and whatever
other information the family requests regard-
ing special education and the law (Turnbull,
et al., 2006). This information must be pro-
vided in language family members can under-
stand. Check to ensure that family members
understand and can follow through. Be pre-
pared to lend a sympathetic ear to parents, to
listen to their stories and to respond to them
with gentleness. Your primary responsibility
is to discover how you will be able to assist
not only the children with disabilities in your
class, but their parents as well. Parents need
to know that you are in their corner, that you
will stand up for their child and seek what is
best for the family.
As Tom’s mother, I attended every IEP
except one (a ride was late and a member of
the IEP team called to say not to come as they
were holding the meeting without me). The
feelings of guilt and shame still
haunt me. I attended every re-
evaluation of eligibility. IEP
meetings lasted a long time with
many professionals whose names
and titles I did not know. I could
not concentrate as my other chil-
dren were playing nearby and I had to be
mindful of them while the professionals were
talking. I remember wondering why the
teacher had to write everything after the meet-
ing while I waited to sign the papers.
As Tom’s father, I recall attending a
mere handful of his IEP meetings. Those
meetings were generally held immediately
after school. I was teaching school and simply
could not leave my job and drive to an IEP
meeting at a school that many times was
miles away from our home. Those meetings
that I did attend were often held in clinical
settings with lots of equipment but no other
children in sight. At one meeting, a doctor I
did not even know suggested that Tom dis-
continue the use of the prone stander since it
was obvious he was not ever going to walk.
At that point, my wife asked him if it were his
son and not Tom, would he be making that
suggestion.
Getting To Know You
Many times parents don’t have child
care (Salisbury & Dunst, 2000) and some-
times they need to bring their other children
to meetings. Parents should inform profes-
sionals about their family and whatever re-
strictions they have. Introduce yourself to
other team members and invite them to share
how they know your child. During the meet-
ing share stories that provide examples of
your child’s strengths. Create a picture of
your child as you see him/her.
Professionals should ensure that par-
ents are introduced to everyone who is pre-
sent at the meeting. Introductions
should be done informally to fa-
cilitate a welcoming environment
where parents feel equal to each
professional who is present. Ex-
plain each aspect of the meeting
using language that is easily un-
derstood (Friend & Cook, 2003). Invite par-
ents to share stories and provide suggestions
about their child. Provide an opportunity for
discussing the suggestions and allow parents
to clarify. Say to yourself, “What would I
want if this were my child.”
We opened our home to mental health
professionals, speech pathologists, physical
therapists, occupational therapists, social
workers, teachers, and educational assistants
for home visits. We were grateful they would
!
4!
Professionals
should not wait
to be asked.
come see Tom in his home environment and
meet other family members. We were able to
talk more openly to professionals who came
to our home. We could show them Tom’s
room and share what he did at home and what
we did for him. This was the best environ-
ment to share his strengths and needs and our
dreams and fears.
Table 1. Suggestions for Parents and Professionals
Parents Professionals
Play It Again, Sam Keep asking for information that is understandable to you
Provide information that is un- derstandable and assist with ad- vocacy
Getting To Know
You
Share with professionals about your family’s/child’s needs and strengths
Ensure all members know each other and their relationship to the family/child
Welcome To My
World
Invite professionals to your home or suggest a familiar place for a meeting such as a commu- nity center
Ask if you could visit the family & child in the home.
Tea for two Volunteer to help in your child’s classroom and suggest activities, crafts, etc. you could manage
Open your classroom, welcome parents to visit and/or help
Nobody Knows
The Trouble I’ve
Seen
Share your feelings about as- suming the role of teacher or therapist
Be responsive of parents fears assuming other roles
The Times They
Are A-Changin
Be actively involved in the tran- sition process. Visit the new placement with your child, meet the new teacher, and bring an artifact from her previous placement
Spend time with parents visiting the new placement with their child
If You Don’t Know
Me By Now
Showcase your child by sharing stories about your child’s strengths and what you want him/her to learn
Focus on the child’s strengths while acknowledging needs that are important to the parents
Call Me, Don’t Be
Afraid, You Can
Call Me
Be available while engaging in stress relieving activities
Recognize the importance of res- pite and communicate with par- ents using communication form suggested by the parents
Ac-cen-tchu-ate
The Positive
Ask about skills for your child and be open to suggestions while providing your suggestions
Explain the importance of a skill and provide informal opportuni- ties for parents to share
They Can’t Take
That Away From
Me
Keep your child as the focus while you share your expecta- tions and express support
Acknowledge level of involve- ment chosen by parents, provide informal opportunities to share information, and reflect on own values and beliefs
!
5!
Welcome To My World
Parents might consider inviting their
child’s teachers and other professionals to see
their child at home. If you are not comfortable
opening your home recommend another place
you would feel comfortable such as a com-
munity center or park. Discuss what your
child does at home and what would help you
and your child. For example, Tom would bite
his shirt when he was agitated or bored. Dur-
ing a home visit I mentioned this to his
teacher and emphasized how expensive it was
to keep buying him new shirts. I
hated to send him to school in a
shirt with holes from his biting.
Tom’s teacher and I requested a
behavioral expert. The behav-
ioral expert came to our home
and together we developed an
intervention that would be used
at school and at home. Having
Tom’s teacher and the behavioral
expert come to our home was convenient for
me. I felt very comfortable in my own home.
Professionals should take advantage
of opportunities to visit their students at home
(Salisbury & Dunst, 2000; Turnbull et al.,
2006). Not all parents may feel comfortable
having professionals in their homes but many
would welcome the opportunity. Ask parents
if you could visit the family in their home or
another place of their choice. If home is not
convenient recommend a place that is com-
fortable perhaps a community center or local
park. Remember to be nonjudgmental regard-
ing parents that may not want to open their
homes to professionals. And remain non-
judgmental regarding what you see and hear
in a student’s home. Be culturally sensitive to
the family when you visit. It is a privilege to
be invited into a family’s home. Leave your
biases at the doorstep and show respect by
adhering to cultural customs. For example, in
Hawaii we remove our shoes before entering
a home.
As his mother I visited Tom’s class-
room frequently. I attended special assemblies
and events. But I never felt comfortable in his
classroom. I felt like an outsider. His class-
room was busy with adults assisting children
who required extensive support. I felt inade-
quate. I did not know how to engage or inter-
act with Tom’s peers. When Tom was at
school it seemed he was in a different culture.
His life was different at school. He “prac-
ticed” doing things we never did at
home. The furniture and equip-
ment seemed cold and mechani-
cal. The professionals were very
nice and welcoming. They were
familiar with the equipment and
with each child in their class-
room. I thought about the class-
rooms of Tom’s siblings and how
the students and teachers wel-
comed me when I visited. I was comfortable
assisting in those classrooms. But in Tom’s
classroom I stood, watched, and tried to
smile. Not all parents feel inadequate working
with their child or in their child’s classroom
but some may.
Tea For Two
Parents might want to volunteer to
help in their child’s class (Darch, Miao, &
Shippen, 2004; Salisbury & Dunst, 2000).
Parents should be able to provide suggestions
regarding activities, crafts, equipment, etc.
you feel you could manage and you know
your child would enjoy. Get to know the other
children in your child’s class. Remember you
are there to assist and to discover more about
the world in which your child spends his day.
Professionals should help parents feel
comfortable when they visit your classroom.
Develop ways of including and assisting par-
!
6!
We were able to
talk more openly
to professionals
who came to
our home.
ents who want to be involved in their child’s
school. Find ways to make your classrooms
inviting to parents so they feel included and
part of the school and classroom community.
Introduce them to the students and staff. Have
a small group activity a parent could lead
such as reading a story or playing an audio
taped story. Allow parents to help plan activi-
ties that interest them. Tom loved music and
loud noises. Playing an adaptation of musical
chairs with his peers in wheelchairs and
standers would have been fun for me as well
as Tom. And when he was an adolescent Me-
tallica would have been his music of choice.
We worked with our son at home on
stretching and strengthening as the physical
therapist and occupational therapist recom-
mended but we never felt comfortable giving
him therapy. We felt inadequate and doubtful
of our technique especially when it seemed
the therapy was hurting him. We wanted to be
the parents not the teachers or
therapists.
We wrote goals and ob-
jectives for Tom while we went
camping during the summer.
These goals and objectives were
given to his extended school year
teacher to document that his IEP
was being addressed when he was
not physically at school. We felt more com-
fortable implementing those goals and objec-
tives as they included skills relevant to family
activities such as sitting upright in a beach
chair for 10 minutes around the campfire or at
the beach.
Nobody Knows The Trouble I’ve Seen
Parents should share with teachers and
therapists feelings of reluctance towards as-
suming therapy responsibilities at home. Let
your child’s teachers and therapists know of
activities your family enjoys at home and in
the community. Brainstorm ways to include
physical and/or skill development in activities
familiar to your family.
Professionals should be patient and
understanding of those parents who aren’t
ready to accept the responsibility of being
their child’s therapist at home (Atheide &
Livermore, 1987; Brazyk, 1989; Turnbull et
al., 2006). If parents are willing to perform
therapy at home ensure they are using proper
techniques. Warn them about any possible
discomfort their child might feel. Demon-
strate the use of therapy during family activi-
ties. If parents or siblings engage in a particu-
lar recreational activity such as jogging or
weight training demonstrate ways to include
their child.
We do not remember the first time
Tom was assessed for special education. He
had been referred by his neurologist to an in-
fant program. The infant program was very
family centered. And although we
only took Tom to his infant pro-
gram twice a week we felt very
comfortable there. We watched
and soothed him as the therapists
worked with him. We spoke to
other parents and we shared sto-
ries about our children. We were
invited to join parent groups and
participate in picnics and group gatherings
where we celebrated our children’s achieve-
ments. We knew the professionals who
worked with him very well. They were inter-
ested in Tom and in his family. We did not
want our son to leave the infant program
when he turned three. At the time we did not
understand his need for “academic” education
with a special education teacher. We wanted
him to continue with physical, occupational,
and speech therapy. We did everything we
could to prolong his placement in early inter-
vention. And although Tom turned 3 years old
!
7!
Each transition
was difficult. We
clung to the
familiar.
in April he was allowed to stay in the early
intervention program through the summer un-
til school started in September. Tom eventu-
ally did transition to a special education pre-
school on a public school campus. It was not
our neighborhood school. He traveled nearly
30 minutes to school by bus. It was not as
easy for us to get to his school to see his
classroom and teacher. But we did manage to
visit several times each year. Tom remained at
the same school with the same teacher
throughout preschool and elementary school.
When Tom transitioned to the junior high
school we were very anxious. Each transition
was difficult. We clung to the familiar. We
knew the school personnel, policies, and envi-
ronment. Change was challenging. It took
Tom longer than us to adjust to
new people and places. But in-
evitably the change provided
different opportunities for learn-
ing that benefited Tom. We both
needed to be challenged to ac-
cept new people, new environ-
ments, and new goals.
The Times They Are A- Changin
Parents need to be involved in the
transition process (Noonan & McCormick,
2006; Turnbull, et al., 2006). Parents should
become familiar with the new campus and
individuals who will be working with their
child. Bring your child along to meet the
teacher and staff prior to the transition. Share
with your child’s prospective teacher ideas
that might ease your child’s transition such as
favorite toys/objects, methods for calming
(e.g. music, rocking chair), and activities.
Bring something from your child’s previous
classroom (e.g. pictures, favorite object) so
there is something familiar to your child.
Professionals should realize that
change can be difficult for parents and their
child. Include parents when planning each
transition. Encourage the parents and child to
visit the projected placement to meet profes-
sionals and other staff. Suggest they visit the
class when other students are there as this
might also ease the transition. Provide an op-
portunity for the parents, child, current pro-
fessionals and prospective professionals to
meet informally to share concerns and expec-
tations. Assist in developing rapport with pro-
spective professionals.
Initially we were impressed during
Tom’s re-evaluation meetings with the reports
read by professionals. The assessment reports
were very detailed and included much techni-
cal information regarding his IQ and adaptive
behavior skills. Even though we did not al-
ways agree with the results of the
various assessments we were
amazed at the amount of time
and expertise professionals dem-
onstrated in conducting and ana-
lyzing the results of the assess-
ments. Some of the information
did not seem pertinent. What did
it matter if his IQ was 20 and the
age equivalency of performing certain skills
was 18 months? We knew he could do things
an 18 month old could not do. He was able to
unlock any door or cupboard he wanted. He
could tune any radio to a station playing his
favorite songs. Yes, he mouthed things but
somehow he knew not to put certain things in
his mouth. And as he became older it seemed
his eligibility for special education continued
to be based on these same assessments. It be-
came painful to hear a report read and ex-
plained that although Tom was now 14 years
old his IQ remained at 20. And in spite of his
goals and objectives and numerous interven-
tions he continued to perform (according to
the assessments) at the developmental age of
an 18 month old. We did not need to hear that
!
8!
Professionals
should focus on the
strengths of the
child and the goals
the child has met.
again. And we certainly did not need to be
reminded that he could not tell stories to his
friends, write a thank-you note, answer the
telephone and take a message, take care of his
personal needs, or help with household
chores.
If You Don’t Know Me By Now
Parents should realize that a review of
assessment results is mandated by IDEA. You
may have a voice as to which assessments
should be administered for your child to con-
tinue eligibility for special education. Share
stories about your child that highlight your
child’s strengths and accomplishments. Bring
photos of your child showcasing achieve-
ments regardless of the amount of progress.
Display work your child has
accomplished at home. And
include ideas of what you
would like your child to learn.
Professionals should
focus on the strengths of the
child and goals that the child
has met or is approaching
rather than comparing the
child with a typical child
through norm-referenced as-
sessments (Noonan & McCormick, 2006).
Ensure that goals and objectives include those
that will enable the child to function ade-
quately at school and with the family at home
and in the community (Salisbury & Dunst,
2000).
We are grateful for all the profession-
als who worked with Tom. We did not have
the time or knowledge to obtain and coordi-
nate services and resources. We were thankful
there was a place for him to go during the day
where he was safe. He was learning many
skills he would not have learned at home. And
although we anxiously anticipated his return
home from school, we were also grateful for
the respite school provided.
Call Me, Don’t Be Afraid, You Can Call
Me
Parents, if possible, take some time
while your child is in school to engage in an
activity that relieves your physical and emo-
tional stress. This might include exercising,
yoga, meditating, reading, listening to music,
etc. But be available in case of an emergency.
If you feel you are not able to be the care co-
ordinator provide the care coordinator with
information regarding your need for services
and resources. Appreciate those who work to
support your child to reach his/her potential.
Professionals should recognize that
for some families school provides an oppor-
tunity for respite. And that res-
pite is a necessity in order for
family members to maintain
their physical and emotional
well-being and healthy relation-
ships (Collins & Collins, 2001;
Singer, Irvin, Irvine, Hawkins,
& Cooley, 1989; Westling &
Fox, 2006). Communicate with
parents regarding potential
services and supports. Provide
daily feedback regarding their child’s pro-
gress and incidentals that occur at school
(Friend & Cook, 2003). Parents may not have
the time to respond to written communica-
tions but most will appreciate hearing how
their child is doing. Be mindful of parents
who are linguistically and culturally diverse.
You may need to communicate verbally using
an interpreter (Friend & Cook, 2003; Turnbull
et al., 2006).
We are appreciative of those dedicated
professionals who worked so diligently with
Tom during his many years in special educa-
tion. He has many skills today that he would
!
9!
Although we
anxiously anticipated
his return home from
school, we were also
grateful for the
respite
school provided.
not have had if they had not worked hard to
teach him. There were times when his profes-
sional team members suggested we include
teaching a specific skill that we doubted he
would be capable of learning. We were unfa-
miliar with strategies such as applied behav-
ior analysis, systematic instruction, functional
assessments, and positive behavioral sup-
ports. We did know that our son loved music,
knobs, buttons, and sounds. We wanted him
to learn to use technology. We do
not remember one skill that the
professionals attempted to teach
him that he did not learn. He may
not have been able to perform the
skill independently but he was
able to partially perform the skill.
He was introduced to technology
and was somewhat successful in using it. His
pocket talker allowed him to choose an item
from the lunch menu. It also allowed him to
say, “Hi” to his general education peers.
We’re grateful for those skills despite the fact
that we may not have initially understood
their importance. Many of those skills are im-
portant for functioning in our family because
our culture, for the most part, coincides with
the Western culture that prevails in special
education.
Ac-cent-chu-ate The Positive
Parents should ask professionals to
explain the importance of a particular skill.
It’s OK to provide your point of view. Be re-
ceptive and patient with the suggestions. You
may be pleasantly surprised with the results.
Professionals should explain the im-
portance and positive impact a skill will have
for the student and for the family. Listen at-
tentively and respond to parents’ questions,
concerns, and suggestions. Provide informal
opportunities for parents to discuss what is
important and functional for their child not
just at school but at home and in the family’s
community (Salisbury & Dunst, 2000).
A family’s ethnic culture and language
may influence the parents’ attitude and rela-
tionship with professionals who work with
their child (Kalyanpur & Harry, 1999). Not all
families want to be involved. They may value
the teacher as a professional and leave educa-
tional goals and instructional methods to the
teachers. Some families may have extended
family to assist them. Their child
may socialize with “cousins” on a
regular basis. School attendance
and educational programming
may not be important for a family
whose post-school goals for their
child with severe disabilities in-
clude working interdependently
with family members and living with family.
We knew that Tom would always live with his
family at home. We thought about what
would happen if we died or became unable to
care for him but we hoped a sibling would
step forward. We didn’t want to think about it.
Our goal for Tom was not living and working
independently. It was living.
They Can’t Take That Away From Me
Parents, try to be supportive of the
professionals who work with your child.
Share your expectations for your child. Rec-
ognize feelings of discouragement and anger.
Keep your child as the focus of your interac-
tions with professionals and staff. If your
child cannot be present bring a picture or
some memento to remind everyone.
Professionals should understand that
parents choose their level of involvement
(Salisbury & Dunst, 2000). That choice may
be a reflection of cultural values. Reflect on
your own culture, values, and beliefs regard-
ing special education and disabilities (Chan,
1990). Become knowledgeable of the cultural
!
10!
Tom’s transition
to adult life
seemed easier
for him than us.
values and beliefs of your students’ families
(Chan, 1990). Take time to “talk story” get-
ting to know your students’ families by con-
versing informally with them. Be mindful that
for some families having a child with a dis-
ability is extremely stressful and emotional
(Turnbull et al., 2006). Feelings of grief, de-
nial, anger, and acceptance can shift daily,
even momentarily. Be understanding.
Our involvement in special education
ended a few years ago. Tom’s transition to
adult life seemed easier for him than us. He
seemed to appreciate not having to wake up
early to catch the bus to get to school. He
loved being home listening to his music. But
for us the inadequate adult services we first
received made us long for the days of special
education. Eventually Tom was accepted into
a “waiver” program that enabled us to hire
someone as his personal assistant. We devel-
oped a schedule of activities at home and in
the community that Tom and his assistant en-
gaged in regularly. Tom’s assistant was about
his age. Together they “worked out,” ate,
went out, and listened to music. He became
Tom’s best friend. Tom graduated to adult life
and that life was good!
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About the Authors:
Patricia Sheehey is an Assistant Professor in the Department of Special
Education at the University of Hawaii at Manoa.
Patrick Sheehey is an Instructor in the Department of Education at the
University of Hawaii at Manoa.
