re-write 2

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WRTG 391

· annotated bibliography of 12 sources.

· each reference will be followed by a short analytical summary of 150-200 words.

· At the end of the short summary, you will include a sentence or two that critically analyzes the source and mentions distinctive features about the article and why it may or may not be useful for you in writing a literature review.

instructor said:

ROUGH DRAFT FEEDBACK:

Ronald, the sources you have gathered appear to be scholarly and credible. They also appear to be linked to your general topic for the literature review. While your summary of each source is mostly clear and on track (although much more editing is needed to correct phrasing and grammatical errors), your paper lacks a 1-2 sentence critical analysis for each source; in your critical analysis, you should be explaining why each source will or will not be useful for your literature review.assignment. It also looks as though your bibliographical entries for each source are missing a volume number and "doi" or "retrieved from" at the end of the citation. Please check for correct citation format. I would recommend submitting your draft to UMUC's Writing Center for free feedback in order to edit and proofread your paper for grammatical errors ("raised game concerning," "focuses on trend," "changed on children environment," etc.). Also, try reading each sentence out loud. Sometimes "a" and "the" are missing in your sentences. Good luck on your revision!

We discussed correcting his references. Then we read through most of his draft.

ACTION STEPS

1. Left align your paper.

2. Your citations are NOT APA compliant. Use this link to see what they should be: http://sites.umuc.edu/library/libhow/apa_examples.cfm

3. Read your essay out loud to hear errors.

4. Eliminate contractions.

5. Learn about possessive nouns.

6. Mention the author(s) in your summaries.

7. Keep one idea to one paragraph.

8. Stay with past tense.

POSSESSIVE NOUNS

From http://www.beth.k12.pa.us/schools/wwwclass/kgrammes/kgrammesgrammar.htm#Possessive

A possessive noun indicates ownership.

Rules:

1. Add an 's to make a singular noun possessive

Example: Chris's coat, the puppy's ears, Mark Twain's stories

 

2. Add only an ' to make a plural noun possessive

Example: doctors' offices, the Evanses' trip, soldiers' uniforms

 

3. Add an 's to a plural noun that does not end in s

Example: mice's hole, children's toys, women's dresses

 

4. Add an 's or only an ' to the end of a compound noun

Example: salesperson's smile, father-in-law's tool, police officers' badges

This handout on possessive nouns will help clarify this issue.

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Anderson, P. M. (2006). Childhood obesity: trends and potential causes. The Future of Children, 16, 19-45. Need DOI or URL

The rapid increase in childhood obesity in the past decades together with other associated health problems has risen grave concerning among health care professional, children advocates, policy experts, and parents. The research paper focuses on trend and more so examining the possible causes of the childhood obesity epidemic. The paper commences by looking at the energy intake, energy balance and energy expenditure with a note that children who take a lot of calories and they don’t participate in physical activity are more expected to be obese compared to others. The researchers are also interested in checking what has changed on children environment in the past decades to upset energy balance equation. The researcher realizes that among the changes that affect kids energy intake are increasing abundant presence of energy dense, high calorie foods and links available in schools. Moreover, children today seem less concern to walk to school, and they travel more in cars which limit chances of using calories in the body through physical activity.

The research article mainly focuses on the possible causes of childhood obesity, and therefore the article will be used later in the literature review synthesis and while going through the possible causes of childhood obesity.

Clark, H. R. (2007). How do parents' child-feeding behaviors influence child weight? Implications for childhood obesity policy. Journal of Public Health, 29 (2), 132-141. DOI: 10.1093

Parents have got a crucial role to play when it comes to children dietary habits, and therefore parents should focus on public health intervention that is designed to improve children diets so as to reduce childhood obesity. The researcher used review of the recent literature as far as child-feeding behavior and the weight is concerned. The data gathered shows that parents report using a range of child-feeding behavior that includes monitoring, restriction, and pressure to eat. The restriction of eating has frequently been associated with child weight gain. Additionally, substantial evidence for a causal relationship between childhood obesity and parents restrictions.

The researcher concludes that parents promote excess weight gain in children through inappropriate child feeding behavior. The researcher also recommends that intervention development so as to increase awareness of possible consequence of inappropriate habits of child-feeding.

The research article also falls into the category of possible causes of the childhood obesity in the society especially focusing more on parents’ behavior in parenting, and it will be useful when writing the literature review .

Delgado-Noguera, M. e. (2009). Quality assessment of clinical practice guidelines for the prevention and treatment of childhood overweight and obesity. European Journal of Pediatrics, 168(7): 789-799. DOI: 10.1007/s00431-008-0836-5 .

Latner, J. D. (2007). Childhood obesity stigma: association with television, videogame, and magazine exposure. Body Image, 4(2), 147-155. DOI or URL

Obesity stigmatization is very prevalent today, and its beginning and the relationship to mass media exposure are largely unidentified. The researcher, in this case, used ninety boys and 171 girls in gathering data. The participants were at the age of ten to thirteen years old whereby they were requested to rank twelve figured peers depicted both with or without various disability or obese . The participants were to rate their attitude towards obese toddlers.

The paper also assessed the weekly time spent on watching video games, television and reading magazines on weekdays. The media usage, magazine, and video games used were significantly correlated with more negative reaction to obese children. Regression analyses revealed that high dislike of children who are about their non-overweight peers was uniquely predicted by magazine reading time and therefore media exposure was linked with stigmatization attitude towards obese victims.

The article mainly focuses on the environmental factors that increase the risk of childhood obesity and hence the literature review will utilize information from this research article while focusing on the causes of the problem.

Moore , B. F. (2016). Interactions between diet and exposure to secondhand smoke on the prevalence of childhood obesity: results from NHANES, 2007–2010. Environmental health perspectives, 124(8), 13-16. DOI: 10.1289/ehp.1510138.

Childhood obesity is a very critical health problem in the United States. The main focus of the study is reporting the incident of obesity according to data in the US. Since obesity processes commence in early life, the data used focuses on obesity before adolescence period.

The incident of childhood obesity is very rampant today and is affecting the children who are not eating healthy and more so that are not achieved in physical activities. The article also shows that the children join kindergarten when they are already overweight, and therefore it means the parents are not paying attention to what their children take and what they so.

Though the obesity increases as children grow up, the highest percent of obese children was realized when they are still very young, and it reduces as they grow up. The kids in kindergarten were four times likely to be obese than those were fourteen years old and above.

Obesity in children of age between five and fourteen years was likely to occur more especially to children who joined kindergarten while overweight.

The research work mainly emphasis on the agents that are potential to cause obesity in young children and cigarette smoking is one of them. The literature review will not focus so much on this research article .

O'dea, J. A. (2005). Prevention of child obesity: ‘First, do no harm’. Health education research, 259-265. Retrieved from UMUC Library on 6/4/2017

Childhood obesity has increased steadily in western and developing countries for the last two decades. The major government today has taken the agenda of child obesity very serious today. The main focus of the research article is to employ the important principle of modern medicine and prevention science and that is ‘First, do no harm.'

Health education problem prevention requires consideration approaches. The first approach to be considered is to be very clear on what one is trying to achieve and have a clear definition of what one is preventing. Moreover, the professionals and health sectors should understand clearly the difference between prevention and treatment of obesity.

Moreover, they should understand and be aware of the fact that their approach in child obesity prevention have a potential of doing harm than good and therefore they should be very careful on the techniques they are using to educate people on child obesity prevention. The approach of education program should not make the victim feel unworthy or intimidate them.

Childhood obesity prevention is a very crucial health education topic. The current health education approaches should be looked at and more so investigate the prevention intentions that may be more hazardous than the benefits.

The research work mainly handles on the way to prevent childhood obesity and it will be one of the journals that will be used in literature review.

Pearce, M. J. (2002). Adolescent obesity, overt and relational peer victimization, and romantic relationships. Obesity, 10(5), 386-393. Retrieved from UMUC Library on 6/4/2017

Much has been said concerning obesity and poor relationships in adolescents, and therefore the main objectives of the research paper are to specifically test the hypothesis that states that obese adolescents are a more frequent victim of poor aggressive and they are less likely to develop romantic relationships. The research methods used in gathering data were questionnaires that were completed as part of screen curriculum in the school district, and the main participants were a group of 416 adolescents where 215 girls and 201 boys in grade 9 participated in the research .

The findings show that obese boys reported more overt victimization and the obese girls reported more rational victimization when compared with average weight peers. The obese girls have minimal chances of dating than their peers, and therefore Obesity affects the lifestyle of children not only when they are young but also in their future especially when it come to the relationship when looking for a couple.

The research work mainly focuses on the impact of the childhood obesity especially in learning and in a relationship, and therefore the research will be essential in the literature review while looking at the impact of the childhood obesity.

Schwartz, M. B. (2003). Childhood obesity: a societal problem to solve. Obesity reviews, 4(1), 57-71. Retrieved from UMUC Library on 6/4/2017

Children and parents have been considered for the responsibility of treating and preventing childhood obesity in America. Therefore, pressure exists in the context of the societal stigmatization of overweight children and the powerful environmental inducement aimed directly at kids to eat nutritionally poor foods. Parents are also concerned about the difficult situation of the social and health consequences of their child's obesity.

The research paper brings together several pieces of literature so as to provide a comprehensive examination of the major challenges facing children who are obese and their relatives. The researcher also extends the study by looking at the extent of stigmatization towards overweight kids and reviews evidence of the conflicting advice that is given to the parents concerning how to assist children in developing healthful eating in the face of biological and learned food preference. The researcher concludes with a call for a shift in thinking concerning the responsibility of the society in treatment, etiology , and prevention of childhood obesity.

Childhood obesity is a serious problem that needs to be addressed seriously, and hence the literature review will include this research work while looking at the possible ways of eradicating childhood obesity in the society .

Sleddens, E. F. et al. (2011). General parenting, childhood overweight and obesity‐inducing behaviors: A review. International journal of pediatric obesity, 6(2), 12-27. DOI: 10.3109/17477166.2011.566339

The research article presented by Sleddens E.F, Esther F.C, and other scholars cover general parenting, obesity-inducing behaviors, and childhood overweight. The paper covers the relationship between parenting and weight related issues as the guide because the general role of parenting lacks despite the efforts in investigating the influence of parents on their children weight status, activity behavior and related dietary

The results of the research indicate that children brought in authoritarian homes are healthier and they were physically active, and have low Body Mass Index (BMI). On the other hand, children brought up with other styles such as uninvolved and indulgent ate unhealthy food such as junk food all the time thus making them obese and gain a lot of weight. Moreover, the paper findings also indicate that general parenting has a differential bearing on children weight, depending on the child and parental traits. The article emphasizes the importance of interaction between children and general parenting practices that shape the future of the children.

The research article mainly deals with behaviors that lead to childhood obesity in the society, and therefore it falls under possible causes of childhood obesity, and it will be one of the research works that will be used in the literature review .

Strauss, R. S. (2000). Childhood obesity and self-esteem. Pediatrics, 105(1), e15-e15. Retrieved from UMUC Library on 6/4/2017

Childhood obesity has negative consequences for childhood self-esteem through the magnitude of the self-esteem in children aged nine and ten years who are obese. The study was conducted whereby 1520 children participated in the research. The researcher used self-perception for body mass index that exceeds ninety-five percent of age and gender. The research used the questionnaire as the instrument of gathering data. Childhood obesity decreases the self-esteem of young children which affects the education, and they feel hated by others.

The decrease in the level of self-esteem in obese children was associated with an increase in loneliness, nervousness, and sadness. Additionally, it was observed that children who are obese and are four years and above are likely to take alcohol and smoke compared to those children with high self-esteem. Moreover, Hispanic females and white females who are obese showed decreased level of self-esteem when compared to non-obese Hispanic females and non-obese white females. The research concludes that white females and obese Hispanic demonstrate significantly lower the levels of self-esteem by early adolescent. The children who have low self-esteem demonstrate significantly high rates of loneliness, sadness, nervousness and are likely to engage in high-risk behavior such as drinking alcohol and smoking.

The research work tackles the impacts of the childhood obesity and thus will be very applicable while discussing the impacts of childhood obesity.

Wang, F. &. (2008). Self‐esteem and cognitive development in the era of the childhood obesity epidemic. Obesity reviews, 9(6), 615-623. DOI: 10.1111/j.1467-789X.2008.00507.x.

The results of obesity for mental health and the cognitive development aren't established to the similar degree as those for chronic diseases such as cancer and respiratory problems. The research study mainly focuses on the interrelationship between body weight, school performance, and self-esteem in childhood. The data was collected by weight and height measurements, self-report of self-esteem, physical activity and diet quality of 4945 grade 5 students linked with standardized literacy test results. Structural equation models were used to confirm the hypothesized relationship between self-esteem, body weight, and school performance.

Self-esteem is one of the most prominent elements of mental health, and personality development and self-esteem may hamper social and cognitive development, and in future , it may lead to poor health outcomes. Childhood obesity has negative effects on cognitive development, self -esteem and one should experience mental health problems and less education achievement. The research used survey technique in collecting the data where elements such as school performance, self-esteem and height and weight are considered.

The research work focuses on the relationship between the childhood obesity, cognitive development, and self-esteem and therefore the journal article will be used in literature review while looking at the effects of childhood obesity.

Wardle, J. &. (2005). The impact of obesity on psychological well-being. Best Practice & Research Clinical Endocrinology & Metabolism, 19(3), 421-440. Retrieved from UMUC Library on 6/4/2017

Children and adolescents affected by obesity face stigmatization and discrimination in many areas of their life and therefore it has been assured that their psychological well-being will be compromised. The paper examines the most recent empirical evidence due to the relationship between childhood obesity and body dissatisfaction, depression and self-esteem. The clinical sample studies report poor psychological wellbeing in treatment seeks when compared to basic population obesity and normal weight control.

Research sample in the community has proposed that despite a moderate level of body dissatisfaction, few obese kids have low self-esteem and depression. Obesity impacts affect the psychological well-being of the children especially those that are very young. Some important mediators and moderators have emerged with causation, female and adolescents been particular at risk. The research paper has proposed various ways of tackling the problems so that it reduces in the future and the best method is to make sure the children participate in physical activities regularly.

The research article will be used in the literature review while dealing with the impacts of childhood obesity .

References

Anderson, P. M. (2006). Childhood obesity: trends and potential causes. . The Future of children, 19-45.

Clark, H. R. (2007). How do parents' child-feeding behaviors influence child weight? Implications for childhood obesity policy. . Journal of Public Health, 132-141.

Karnik, S. &. (2015). Childhood obesity: a global public health crisis. Int J Prev Med, 1-7

Krebs, N. F. (2007). Assessment of child and adolescent overweight and obesity. Pediatrics, S193-S228.

Latner, J. D. (2007). Childhood obesity stigma: association with television, videogame, and magazine exposure. . Body image, 147-155.

O'dea, J. A. (2005). Prevention of child obesity: ‘First, do no harm’. Health education research, 259-265.

Pearce, M. J. (2002). Adolescent obesity, overt and relational peer victimization, and romantic relationships. Obesity, 386-393.

Schwartz, M. B. (2003). Childhood obesity: a societal problem to solve. Obesity reviews, 57-71.

Sleddens, E. F. et al. (2011). General parenting, childhood overweight and obesity‐inducing behaviors: A review. International journal of pediatric obesity, 12-27.

Strauss, R. S. (2000). Childhood obesity and self-esteem. Pediatrics, e15-e15.

Wang, F. &. (2008). Self‐esteem and cognitive development in the era of the childhood obesity epidemic. Obesity reviews, 615-623.

Wardle, J. &. (2005). The impact of obesity on psychological well-being. Best Practice & Research Clinical Endocrinology & Metabolism, 421-440.

Best,

Writing Advisor:

Mo Bishop

The Effective Writing Center

www.umuc.edu/writingcenter

University of Maryland University College

3501 University Boulevard East, Adelphi, Maryland 20783

Description of Assignment and/or Question

Focus of Session

�APA title page?

�In all your ABs, mention the authors a few time in your summations so the reader knows these are their assertions.

�Left align this text

�non essential phrase. Surround with commas.

�Read out loud

�plural

�please read your essay and make sure you watch out for plural nouns.

�in

�cut

�to children of normal weight

�the author is

�the

�same para

�possessive

kids’

�the

�?? cut and links

�simplify

�Why a new para?

�Fix spacing

�Re think this sentence

�cut

�italicize

�possessive

�a

�cut

�possessive

�fragment

The author shows

�same para

�plural

look for more nouns that should be plural

�good

�finish this!

�comma

�cut

�cut

�and some obese and others at normal weight

�comma

�fix it

�focused

use past tense

�double space-hanging indent. Incorrect format in all your references

�the

�who do not excel in

�same para

�cut

�obesity reduced

�grew

�same para

�behaviors

�This was not mentioned in your summary

�If it is not helpful-say so.

�Adverb-seriously

�Double quotation marks

�unclear

�has

�more

�this

�past tense

�wordy

Why is this different than the other articles? You need to offer an analysis.

�This article

�?

�good

�same para

�what is this?

�Responsible for

�This is a verbatim quote Where are the quotation marks and the citation?

�define

�cut

�better

�weight problems

�lacks what?

�It indicates

�up

�decide on verb tense and stick to it. use past tense

�these are not styles

�comma

�same thing

�why is it different?

�Is this a quote?

�old

�drink

�adolescence

�cut

�the

�the

�and

�???

�cut

�read

�plural?

�Really?

This is different. Yes?

�What?

�What?

�Where is analysis. Why will you use it?

�You do not need a reference page.

�Not needed