essay question
abdull110
week_2_bullies.pptBullies
Hatred deforms the hater more than the hated. As if any enemy could be more hurtful than the hatred with which he has incensed against him; or could wound more deeply him whom he persecutes, than he wounds his own soul by his enmity.
-St. Augustine
(Fifth-Century Bishop)
Bullying:
Is It Human Nature?
- Primates: Often attack a weaker member of the group to reinforce social standing and relieve aggression.
- Toddlers: Will regularly grab toys from other children, refuse to take turns, and bite or push other children when angry.
Is bullying innate?
Anger, Aggression, and Bullying
- Anger: Is an emotion – an emotion we all feel.
- Aggression: Is an impulse – an impulse we can channel a variety of ways (hitting, crying, exercising etc.).
- Bullying: Is a behavior – a behavior used to channel aggression, but an unacceptable one because of the harm it causes others.
Dominate Emotions of a Bully
~ Board Mind Map ~
Suspicious, Frustrated, Disgusted, Confident, Sad, Cautious, Smug, Depressed, Lonely, Jealous, Provoked, Insecure, Dominate, Fearful, Distressed, Superior
_____
_______
_________
Dominate Emotions of a Bully
~ Board Mind Map ~
Suspicious, Frustrated, Disgusted, Confident, Sad, Cautious, Smug, Depressed, Lonely, Jealous, Provoked, Insecure, Dominate, Fearful, Distressed, Superior
ANGER # 3
POWER # 2
CONTEMPT # 1
Three Common Dispositions
Sense of Entitlement:
Right or privilege to control, subjugate, and dominate another person.
Intolerance for Differences:
Different means inferior, and subsequently not worthy of respect.
Liberty to Exclude:
Those not worthy of respect should be isolated, segregated, or ostracized.
Frequently Seen in Bullies
Dominates others.
Uses others to get what they want.
Unwilling to negotiate.
Has difficulty seeing a situation from another persons standpoint.
Concerned only with their own wants and pleasure.
Unwilling to accept other peoples ideas.
Usually will hurt others when adults are not around.
Targets only those who are weaker in some way.
Does not accept responsibility for their actions.
Lacks the foresight to consider the consequences of their actions.
Blame, criticism and false allegations are used to project their own inadequacies onto their target.
When a Bully is Caught…
~ Huston and Billy ~
- Denies.
- Trivializes (his role in the event).
- Counters-attacks the other party.
- Claims to be the victim.
- Plays role reversal.
- Counts on support of bystanders and friends.
~ Verbal Bullying ~
Teasing Vs. Taunting
Flirting Vs. Sexual Bullying
How can we teach kids not to taunt or sexually bully when teasing and flirting is such a normal part of our relationships and interactions with others?
Teasing Vs. Taunting
Teasing
1. Role reversal occurs naturally.
2. Not intended to hurt
3. Lighthearted, clever, benign
4. Humor for both parties to enjoy.
5. Just one part of many mutually enjoyed activities or connections.
6. Discontinued if objections to teasing
7. Innocent in motive
Taunting
1. One sided – power imbalance
2. Intended to harm
3. Humiliating, cruel, demeaning, bigoted
4. Humor at target, not with target.
5. Fear of further taunting, or prelude to physical bullying.
6. Increases with objections or distress
7. Sinister in motive
Flirting Vs. Sexual Bullying
Flirting
Invites role reversal
Not hurtful – expression of desire
Intended to be flattering and complimentary
Invites sexual attention
Intended to make other feel wanted, attractive, and in control.
Discontinued if the other person becomes upset, objects or is not interested.
Sexual Bullying
Based on power imbalance – one sided.
Intended to harm, exploit degrade, demean.
Invasive – intended to assert status of bully.
Intended to violate boundaries of victim.
Intended to make other feel rejected, ugly, powerless, and uncomfortable.
Increases when other person becomes distressed or objects.
Conclusions
Bullies often choose to exploit other individuals by using the unacceptable behaviors of taunting and sexual bullying.
As social and relationship skills develop children learn to hone these acceptable and unacceptable behaviors.
As age and sophistication increase, children become more proficient in the use of these communication styles; for the benefit or detriment of themselves and the recipients of their attention.
