When Dawn was 3 years old, Terry gave birth to the couple’s second child, a son named Darren. Soon after the baby’s birth, the family learned that Darren had a congenital heart problem that would require ongoing medical treatment and a specific regimen of care at home. Darren was an irritable baby. He fussed for long periods and was very difficult for Terry to soothe. Because of Darren’s need for medical care and the limitations of Bill’s medical insurance, the couple soon found themselves time to read to Dawn, to take her for walks, and to help her master tasks that proved frustrating, Terry now had to shift her attention to the care of her medically fragile infant. Because Dawn looked so grown-up compared to the vulnerable newborn, Terry began to perceive her daughter as able to do many things for herself.
When Dawn demonstrated her neediness by clinging or whining, Terry became abrupt and demanded that Dawn stop. Many battles revolved around Terry’s new rule that Dawn have a nap or “quiet time” each afternoon so that mother and baby could get some rest. One day, Dawn’s preschool teacher, Mrs. Adams, asked to speak with Terry. Mrs. Adams noted that Dawn’s behavior was becoming a problem in the morning preschool sessions. Dawn had begun throwing toys when she became upset and often refused to cooperate in group activities. Terry was greatly embarrassed to hear about her daughter’s misbehavior. Dawn was the only Black child in the small class, and her mother wondered if in financial difficulty. Bill began to take on overtime work at the company to subsidize some of the bills and was away from the home several nights a week and part of each weekend. Terry found the care of two demanding young children and the worries about money to be increasingly more stressful. She was always tired and seemed to have less patience with her family. whereas she once had the leisure time to read to Dawn, to take her for walks, and to help her master tasks that proved frustrating, Terry now had to shift her attention to the care of her medically fragile infant. Because Dawn looked so grown-up compared to the vulnerable newborn, Terry began to perceive her daughter as able to do many things for herself. When Dawn demonstrated her neediness by clinging or whining, Terry became abrupt and demanded that Dawn stop. Many battles revolved around Terry’s new rule that Dawn have a nap or “quiet time” each afternoon so that mother and baby could get some rest.
One day, Dawn’s preschool teacher, Mrs. Adams, asked to speak with Terry. Mrs. Adams noted that Dawn’s behavior was becoming a problem in the morning preschool sessions. Dawn had begun throwing toys when she became upset and often refused to cooperate in group activities. Terry was greatly embarrassed to hear about her daughter’s this was part of the problem. When Terry got home, she put her tearful, clinging daughter in her room for time-out for being bad at school. She loved Dawn, but she could not tolerate this kind of behavior, especially when Darren needed so much of her time. She began to wonder if she and Bill had spoiled their daughter. Terry feared that Dawn would have problems when it came time
for her to enter kindergarten if they didn’t take a strong stand with her now.
this was part of the problem. When Terry got home, she put her tearful, clinging daughter in her room for time-out for being bad at school. She loved Dawn, but she could not tolerate this kind of behavior, especially when Darren needed so much of her time. She began to wonder if she and Bill had spoiled their daughter. Terry feared that Dawn would have problems when it came time for her to enter kindergarten if they didn’t take a strong stand with her now.
Discussion Questions
1. explain Dawn’s behavior from an attachment point of view. How would you describe Dawn’s attachment history?
2. Describe Terry’s parenting style. Has the style changed? What suggestions would you make to Terry and Bill about handling this problem?
3. What are some of the contextual influences on Dawn’s behavior?