3 exercises

Topic sentence (or sub-point): Despite the fact that some political analysts believe

that prominent women like Hillary Clinton, Sarah Palin, and even Condoleezza

Rice rose in politics for reasons other than talent and intelligence, women still have

a solid chance of obtaining powerful political positions because of the connections

between the business world and the realm of politics.

Quotation from ACTUAL ARTICLE: Cathy Alten explains that “Women have

also benefited from the lack of an old boy's network. Relatively weakened political

parties and open primaries make it easier for newcomers to break in. Washington's

tech-driven, entrepreneurial economy has also generated a high number of women

business owners” (13).

PARAPHRASING:

FLIP-FLOP: Washington's tech-driven, entrepreneurial economy has also

generated a high number of women business owners. Relatively weakened political

parties and open primaries make it easier for newcomers to break in. Women have

also benefited from the lack of an old boy's network.

REWRITE: Many women now own businesses because Washington has focused

on technology and emerging upstart companies. A fragile party system where

anyone can initially run gives new entrants a chance. Declining male favoritism

and fewer longstanding alliances have helped females.

TWEAK: Many women now own businesses because Washington has focused on

technology and emerging upstart companies. Combine this with a fragile party

system where anyone can initially run giving new entrants a chance and with

declining male favoritism and fewer longstanding alliances, and females have a

greater opportunity.

Integration (sandwiching):

Despite the fact that some political analysts believe that Hillary Clinton,

Sarah Palin, and even Condoleezza Rice rose in politics for reasons other than

talent and intelligence, women still have a solid chance of obtaining powerful

political positions because of the connections between the business world and the

realm of politics. There is a bridge where there used to be a chasm. Cathy Alten

explains that many women now own businesses because Washington has focused

on technology and emerging upstart companies. Combine this with a fragile party

system where anyone can initially run (giving new entrants a chance) and with

declining male favoritism and fewer longstanding alliances, and females have a

greater opportunity (7). It is not necessarily that Washington is fairer and less male

oriented; rather, it is more a case of the business sector being fairer toward women.

Women fill many high-ranking CEO positions across the country. There are female

presidents and vice-presidents in many national corporations. Females are the

owners of a growing number of small businesses. Because business is such a big

part of politics now, this emphasis on business in Washington opens more doors to

women—only the men haven’t opened them, corporate America and the support of

entrepreneurship have.