speech assignment 2

As little as 7% of a message may be communicated by the words we use.

"Actions speak louder than words." I am sure you have heard this phrase many times. Perhaps someone said it to you when you had a misunderstanding over the meaning of a message. Perhaps you used this phrase yourself to question the intent of a friend, family member, or coworker. What does it suggest? How do our actions and other nonverbal communication add to or detract from our goal of a meeting of the minds?

In the introduction to this course, we said that communication is power--the power to inform, the power to influence others, the power to entertain, and the power to manage interpersonal exchanges. How much of that power is in the words we choose? How much of that power is harnessed in the nonverbal?

In fact, the most widely accepted research on this topic breaks it down like this:

Body language is made up of several things, including facial expression, gestures, eye contact, and posture. The charades game you played as a kid that required you to use body language alone to get your teammates to guess the name of a movie or a well-known phrase, the era of the silent movie, and the talent of a mime all teach us that body language is powerful.

I am sure you can recall a time when you conveyed a message to another using the power of your body language - a look you shot your daughters when they got chatty in church, an ear-to-ear smile and open arms for your spouse when he or she returned from a business trip, the soft touch on the arm of a friend who was mourning the loss of a loved one, a hug and a tender look for your son who skinned his knee. These are all powerful messages.

In addition, your voice, which can include volume, pitch, rate, variation, tone, and more, can say a lot. Anyone who grew up with a father who bellowed first, middle, and last names at the sight of an undone chore or who has a friend with a laugh that can light up a room knows the impact voice can have on communicating a message, with or without words.

Furthermore, how we manipulate our environment tells a story as well. Think for a minute about your workspace. Is your desk clean, or does it look lived in? Have you personalized your workspace, or is it rather stark? Does your workspace flaunt your outstanding organizational skills, or does it scream that you are a slob?

The way that we present ourselves, from how we wear our hair to the time we keep, sends a message. You may know teenagers who speak volumes with their wardrobe. Have you ever been late for an important meeting? That, too, sends a message. Employers tell us that they make a judgment about a candidate in the first 30 seconds of an interview based on appearance alone. If that does not convince you of the power of nonverbal communication, nothing will.

Consider this:

· How do you use body language and your voice to add meaning to the messages you send?

· What message do you send with how you present yourself? Does it match your intent?

· Does the way you manage your environment contribute positively to your communication goals?

· Does your nonverbal communication, in general, match your verbal communication?

While it's true that nonverbal communication is powerful, recognize that it can add to or detract from your messages as a result of its ambiguity. Factor in gender and cultural differences and the defined ambiguity is multiplied. In the global world we live in, miscommunication is even more commonplace. Taking the time to examine your nonverbal communication to determine its effectiveness is an important goal of this course. Remember, communication is power. Use it well.

We really do not spend much time at all talking about listening. Even in a college-level communications course, listening is just one TCO. Embrace the rare opportunity that you are presented with this week to learn about your listening habits and improve your listening skills.

As little as 7% of a message may be communicated by the words we use.

Let's get started by learning about your own listening skills. Taking the following quiz that evaluates your listening habits and see if you are an A, B, C, D, or F quality listener. Be as honest with yourself as possible when answering the following questions.

Listening exercise

You might identify with some of the following types of ineffective listening styles. Like any interpersonal shortcoming, these styles become a habit that we fall into over time. Take a look at this list and see if any of them look familiar.

· The pretender is the listener who seems to be listening but is really focused on something else. As a result, the speaker may have no idea that his or her message has not been received.

· The spotlighter is the listener who consistently manages the conversation so the focus is on him or her rather than the message being sent.

· The cherry picker is the listener who only responds to messages he or she is interested in and spits out all the others.

· The avoider is the listener who will not respond to topics that are uncomfortable.

· The defender is the listener who takes things personally and perceives many messages as attacks.

· The covert attacker is the listener who listens carefully but for the wrong reasons. He or she has an ulterior motive of collecting ammunition for use at another time during a surprise attack.

· The realist is the listener who perceives the message literally and has difficulty reading between the lines for the intended meaning.

We will talk about these in more detail in the threaded discussions as we explore the reasons for why we do not listen better.

We have referred to communication noise several times throughout this course and have established that noise on the part of the listener can have a great impact on communication goals. One of our threaded discussions this week says that we can listen at a rate that is at least three times faster than the rate that the speaker can speak. Hmm. Doesn't this mean that we are actually outstanding listeners? Great observation! Yes, it does.

We listen at a rate of approximately 500-600 words per minute. We speak at a rate of only 100-150 words per minute, so it sure seems that we should be able to come to a meeting of the minds easily, if that is true. In fact, we are such good listeners that the difference between these rates actually gives us more time than we need, right? Unfortunately, we don't always use that extra time well, and this is what contributes to the problem of ineffective listening. How do you use that time? This week in the threaded discussion, we will identify practical solutions that you can implement today to help you to become a better listener. Stay tuned!