English Prewriting

Relationship Violence

I find it intriguing to get a lady who is just a freshman with a black eye or even depressed individuals isolating themselves due to the fear of disappointing the individuals they are dating. This is not funny. It is not only affecting the ladies but also the young men. We are living in a diverse world. It is very common nowadays to find various types of relationships in terms of sexual orientation. Anyway, the issue here is violence towards one’s spouse. I remember, my first experience as a freshman, all I wanted was acceptance and I think that’s what each freshman wants. This causes most of us to subject into relationships just to feel important and needed. This issue is mostly under the radar since the victims are silent and do not want to destroy their relationships because they ‘love’ them. Relationship violence has become an issue and I think that it’s important for the administration and the guidance and counseling department of universities to have a look at the issue.

The most common type of relationship violence in our college is physical abuse. This mostly happen to the ladies who hide the afflictions with lots and lots of make-up. A good example is a lady who is dating one of the popular guys in college. Because she wants to be accepted, identified and ‘noticed’ in college, she agrees to be in a relationship with this guy. When the guy becomes physically abuse to an extent of even raping her, the lady just remains quiet because of the pressures of wanting to belong somewhere; ‘having a title. Some are even expected to do their boyfriends’ school work with the fear of being hurt. This type of violence does not necessarily involve physical abuse. Some individuals are misused in terms of money whereby they are expected to accommodate the needs of their spouses in addition to their needs just because they are in a relationship. Helping out if one is in need is not wrong. The point is, we are all students and some of us work to maintain ourselves in school. Therefore, when a student like that is expected to maintain another student just because they are dating, then it becomes an issue that needs intervention.

Another form of relationship violence is emotional violence. Some students find it difficult to express their sexual orientation especially the homosexuals as a result of acceptance. A good example is, let us assume that the football team captain is a homosexual and hence, because of his status, he hides it by looking for a girlfriend to hide his identity. The lady, in this case, becomes subject to emotional torture since she is being used in a relationship that is not justified. Another type of emotional violence is being in a relationship with a ‘player’. Because of his or her popularity in school, a student finds it difficult getting out of their relationship since he or she does not want to break the ‘player’s feelings. Moreover, some people date just to revenge on others after being heart broken. The third wheel in this case is subject to emotional violence since their feelings are being toyed by being used as a weapon to get back at someone else. Some of us are still subject to racial discrimination. We are a diverse community and everyone is free to express his or her views depending on how they feel towards a particular issue. Some students are subject to racial bias among their peers and hence when they find themselves in a relationship that gives them some form of acceptance, they remain in it despite f it involving violence.

Most of the relationships violence are caused by exaggerated jealousy, self-esteem issues, drugs and substance abuse, extreme anger, being overly possessive, mood swings that are unpredictable, a bad relationship history, threats to commit suicide or subject oneself to harm when being left, finding the pleasure of humiliating an individual in front of others, verbal abuse, ignoring an individual’s feelings, the need to find acceptance, blaming one’s spouse for the occurrence of a particular behavior, family background, and also, negative attitude towards a particular race

Relationship violence has a lot of effects to the victims that include body harm when subjected to physical abuse, depression as a result of emotional torture, fear of interacting with others as result of fearing one’s partner, poor academic performance as a result of insecurities, low self-esteem as a result of verbal abuse, lack of a stable relationship with other peers especially when one’s spouse is possessive and also, future problems when it comes to developing relationships in future as a result of uncertainty.

Therefore, it is important that as students to be each other’s keeper and report any form of abuse that our peers might be subjected to. It affects us in a way and hence it is important to try our level best to assist our friends in ways that we can; even when it means reporting to the authorities.