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Unit 4—Commemorative (FA2015) Page 1

Unit Five: Commemorative Speaking

Total points for this unit: 125 Readings: 18 and review 12

Commemorative speaking, also known as special occasion speaking, gives speakers experience in one of our most

commonly used speech. A manuscript is used instead of an outline because the intention is not to be “informative” or

“factual”, but to use stylistic delivery skills that affect the audience more thoughtfully and emotionally. Manuscripts are

used for speakers who give speeches at weddings, funerals, graduations, anniversaries, and breaking-ground ceremonies,

to name a few.

Time: 4-5 minutes

Prepare and present a 4-5 minute speech that pays tribute to a person, concept, organization or institution.

Harsher penalties will be applied, up to a full letter grade, for going over/under time.

Student Critique Sheet: None

Self-evaluation: No self-evaluation with this unit.

Visual Aids: No visual aid requirement for this speech, but you may use them if you choose to.

Manuscript:

You will bring two manuscripts: one you will use during your speech, (marked up with delivery notes), and the

other I will use to follow you as you speak. Avoid spelling, typographical or grammatical errors. Failure to

proof your written work will result in a reduction of your grade. Not including a final draft of your

manuscript for grading will be a 20 point deduction.

PREPARE FOR SPEECH DAY IN TWO STEPS: STEP ONE (D2L): Before you come to class… You will attach a copy of your completed, typed outline, including your works cited, in the D2L drop box. If you have not attached your outline by the time I get home

and grade your speech you will lose points on your speech.

 Save your file in this way using your own name: White_Shaun_Commemorative_FA2012  Be sure to save your work as a .doc or .docx file—if I cannot open it then it does not count.  Print off one copy of the Commemorative Student Critique Sheet

STEP TWO (Folder): Before you come to class…On the day you are scheduled to speak you will provide a

folder with the following documents:

 Your typed manuscript speech (Commemorative)  The professor critique sheet

PENALTIES FOR NOT PROVIDING THE CORRECT INFORMATION:

*I will never accept late outlines or other materials.  Not including the professor critique sheet in the folder: speech cannot be graded--ZERO!  Not including a copy for the instructor to follow during the speech: 20 point deduction  Not submitting a copy in D2L: 5 point deduction

Unit 4—Commemorative (FA2015) Page 2

Your speech should accomplish the following:

 Identify and illustrate the virtues possessed by your subject

 Careful consideration for word choice and examples that “paint the picture” of your subject.

 Employ colorful, concrete and evocative language.

 Strong use of clear stylistic devices: you must employ at least three stylistic devices in your speech.

 Have a carefully polished delivery that employs dramatic pauses, vocal variations, and artistic phrasing. .

Suggestions

 In selecting a topic for this assignment, spend some time deliberating on a subject that is truly praiseworthy.

In order for a human action to be considered praiseworthy, it must be intentional and your audience must

perceive it as virtuous.

 As a general rule, it is easier to speak about a person with whom you have a personal relationship. Parents,

grandparents, siblings, spouses, significant others, children, aunts and uncles, are natural choices. You may also

think about a favorite coach, neighbor, teacher, etc. While it is more difficult, you can also choose objects or

places such as Rocky Mountain National Park, the Poudre River, Mile High Stadium, etc.

 Abstract concepts are definitely the most challenging, but it is theoretically possible to praise ideas such as

democracy, nature, freedom, art, music, etc. However, the more abstract the topic, the more difficult it will be to

invent and amplify virtues.

 Once you have chosen your subject and written out some great memories, spend some time on word choice

and artistic phrasing. It doesn’t have to sound “flowery”, if that’s not your style, but it should sound honest and

sincere.

Delivery

Unlike the other speeches of the semester, this assignment will be read from manuscript. That means you will

deliver the speech exactly as it is written. Since this is a manuscript speech, there is no excuse for falling

outside of the time limits. Therefore, when you have finished polishing and editing your speech, you will need

to time it exactly. Cut or expand the speech to fit precisely between 4-5 minutes. Then, produce a clean

manuscript to hand in to me. This should be double-spaced and be free of typographical, spelling, grammatical,

and punctuation errors. A substantial part of your grade will be based on the quality of the manuscript you

submit.

Your reading copy: Prepare a reading copy of your manuscript – the one you will use to deliver the speech.

The reading copy should be marked up with underlining and instructions on pauses, intonations, volume and so

forth. The reading copy may be typed triple-spaced or printed in oversized type. That is up to you. Many

students find it helpful to glue their sheets of paper to stiff cardboard, or print on card stock, for ease of

handling. You will not be allowed to use the podium so you want your manuscript to be formatted and

constructed in a way that will allow maximum ease and freedom when delivering the speech.

Practice: To be successful, you should rehearse the speech until it is nearly memorized (or actually

memorized). Above all, on the day of the speech, you must avoid the impression that you are reading from your

manuscript for the first time. You should also be so familiar with your manuscript, that once you begin a

sentence or a line of text, you can finish it without looking back down. As you are delivering your speech, try

Unit 4—Commemorative (FA2015) Page 3

to maintain good eye contact with the audience. You want to sound spontaneous and sincere, even though

every word has been carefully planned and rehearsed.

Performance: You should use dramatic pauses; vary the tone of your voice; vary the volume and rate; and use

gestures and facial expressions to underscore the meaning of the words.

The best way to approach this assignment is to give a sincere speech from your heart. A speech that is well-

practiced and smooth in delivery will come across as a very eloquent speech.

Sometimes students feel that they don’t know anyone famous or heroic or successful enough to praise publicly

in a speech. They are embarrassed that their subject is not wealthy or powerful. But as we all know, seemingly

ordinary individuals often lead extraordinary lives, but they do it quietly and privately. Hard work, dignity,

integrity, or love of life, are all wonderful virtues that are exhibited every day by people who may not be

“successful” by materialistic standards.

Manuscipt: Instead of an outline, you will write a manuscript, which will look similar to an essay. The construction of

the manuscript will require that you include the following:

 An introduction that sets the tone of the speech, reveal the topic, and clearly identify the virtues.

 A body that addresses each previewed virtue and develop them with examples and stylistic language.

 A conclusion that brings the speech to a nice closing and readdresses the virtues.

 The preview and summary of virtues should be identified and bolded in the manuscript.

 All stylistic devices used in the speech need to be identified and bolded in the manuscript.

Stylistic devices: Descriptions of the stylistic devices can be found in your textbook, chapter twelve. Good public

speakers use imagery and rhythm devices to make their speeches more interesting and help to “paint the picture” of the

person, place, or thing they are speaking about. You are required to employ a minimum of three different devices from

the following:

 Imagery devices: simile, metaphor

 Rhythmic devices: parallelism, repetition, alliteration, antithesis

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Professor Critique Sheet: Commemorative Speech—125 points

Speaker Name:_______________________ Time ______ Points ______ Grade_____

Time: 4-5 minutes—your final grade is adjusted if you are over/under time.

Not including a manuscript in the folder is a 20 point deduction.

INTRODUCTION: 13 pts.

Captured attention and interest (4)_____

Established proper mood (4)_____

Clear preview (virtues are clear, labeled, and in bold) (5)_____

BODY: 36 pts.

Main points are unified and cohesive (3)_____

Virtues clear (6) _____

Virtues well illustrated (6)_____

Pathos/emotional appeal (5)_____

Correct word usage and grammar (5)_____

Concrete language/vivid description (5)_____

Employed at least three different imagery devices: (6)____

Use of visual aids (not required):

CONCLUSION: 12 pts.

Reinforced appropriate mood (4)_____

Virtues restated (labeled and in bold) (4)_____

Meaningful last line/impact (4)_____

DELIVERY: 49 pts.

Eye contact (10)_____

Vocal variety (5)_____

Volume (5)_____

Rate (5) ____

Smoothness of delivery (5)_____

Tone and tension (3)_____

Use of pauses (4)_____

Facial expressions and gestures (4)_____

Avoided distracting mannerisms (4)_____

Did the delivery appear extemporaneous (4)_____

MANUSCRIPT: 9 pts.

Grammatically correct (3)_____

Labeled and bolded the imagery devices (3)____

Corresponds to oral presentation (3)_____

SPEAKER MANUSCRIPT: 6 pts.

Cues for speaker are present on manuscript (3)_____

Cues for speaker effectively helped delivery (3 )_____

Did the speaker submit a copy in the D2L drop box? Yes______ No (-5 pts.)______

Unit 4—Commemorative (FA2015) Page 5

Arela Fannin

The Most Unlikely

The most unlikely to be the high school quarter back. The most unlikely to tutor a student. The most

unlikely to succeed. (Rhythm: repetition) And that is why Sean Rehm, a best friend from my past, is the most

unlikely to ever be recognized as an inspiration to anyone. He’s a degenerate street skate-boarding, graffiti punk

after all. Possessing strength, love and wisdom beyond his years, I observed and admired his will to forever

stay true to himself. (Preview virtues) Through many tumultuous years we remained magnetically connected.

This charismatic soul became, the most unlikely to inspire, the most unlikely to change my life!

Wise beyond his own comprehension, the words he spoke to me I could not yet understand. It wasn’t

until almost twenty years later after many philosophical readings and ancient scriptures were digested that I saw

and read these universal secrets in which a lost boy of the world once shared with me, while we lie awake

through some nights discussing the mysteries of life as young teens will do. I was fourteen, and he, four years

older than I. We were inseparable as soon as our first encounter. I opened my mind when he proposed that no

matter where you go there you are, to retaliate to my complaints about wanting to run away! He taught me to

fight, to hold my fist just right as I wailed into his six pack while he laughed. The big brother I never had,

rescued me from being a weak standing white lily in the ghetto, to a strong rooted tall sunflower able to take on

what life may rain upon me (Imagery: metaphor). Through observation of his unconventional drifter happy

lifestyle, I related to his ideas and admired his free spirit. Instilled within my core were his values against the

government’s injustices against humanity, as he spoke of beliefs of what the future held for the American

This is an excellent example of a commemorative speech. Throughout the speech, she is sincere, honest,

and expresses gratitude for her friend. Her use metaphors, similes, and parallelism (imagery and

rhythmic devices) give the speech a rich tone of expression and rhythm. As you are writing your speech,

refer to chapter 12 to help you choose stylistic devices that give your speech a rich “flavor” of expression.

You are required to use at least three different stylistic devices.

Be sure to bold your virtues in the introduction and conclusion of your speech.

Unit 4—Commemorative (FA2015) Page 6

population. Genetic modifications, oil-sucking earth polluters, and satellite controlled video surveillance to

name a few. I was appalled, and fascinated at times, as he explained his perspectives while lighting twenty

dollar bills on fire in front of me saying, “money is nothing but paper, it’s so easy to make and so easy to burn.

Amidst the rolling hills of North County San Diego where the Hells Angels manufactured some of the

purest crystal meth in the 90’s, I witnessed lifestyles vividly unimaginable. Sean was a part of this double life

where I somehow ruled my household at the time, and so by loving me, he shielded me from over-using a sick

substance in which he sold as well as habitually used. I watched as he lost his contract with Transworld, a

skateboarding magazine. And, well-renowned pros, whom once admired his risk-taking ollies over the huge

blue city street mailboxes, shied away. He began to repel friends, once his addiction took over. No longer did

we see his amazing unique graffiti art covering random city street walls, as he slipped away to the dark inside

dwelling where one staples blankets to cover home windows. No longer did his skin shine golden in the

California sun as it did once before, when he ripped up the waves for hours, arriving to crisp waters before all

awoke. He wanted to experience his real love in life in one of its purest forms. No longer did his blue eyes

sparkle like the shimmering waves (Imagery: simile), and with the thirst to change the world’s view, as he

rapidly descended, deteriorating into drug disillusionment (Rhythm: metaphor).

Because of love I was able to escape. Love led me away from the horrors like death. Unconditional love

for myself as well as strength to persevere through shit, followed by the inner wisdom to flee from the grips of

demonic grasps saved my soul. The love for the child whose mother we found stiff stuck with death needle in

her arm told me to leave. The love for my mother’s safety as she withered away with leathered biker crews, a

first time user at age 40 losing her job, kids and home, told me to leave. And Sean’s blaring honesty towards me

about all which was truly happening around, told me to leave. No more raids, no more fights, no more death.

(Rhythm: repetition) To face indescribable scenes, watch all loves fade to dust and rise up from the ashes a

warrior of love, I knew through watching my best friend’s journey, that I would never live a life of despair

which encompassed the meth world. I loved Sean so much that I left. I left all whom I once knew, I left my

family’s home, and I left behind a life which would never be lived again (Rhythm: repetition) I became an

Unit 4—Commemorative (FA2015) Page 7

advocate for high school students speaking publicly about the unknown dangers of crystal use. I became a

nanny for Sean’s nieces and went into early childhood education where I held a career for many enjoyable

years. I never saw Sean again as he remained true to his lifestyle, and I often wonder what ever became of the

one whom inspired me to live a life of love by staying true to myself and beliefs!

He was the most unlikely to ever inspire, yet inspiration to forever leave the dark depths encompassing

meth which lead to death, is what this unlikely best friend passed on to me. The strength, love and wisdom

(reinstate virtues) in which he wholly possessed as his virtues were the very tools I chose to take with me, as I

built a new foundation confidently, lovingly and with purpose. I will never forget his words to me, “No matter

where you go, there you are!”