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· Interpersonal Communication

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Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Mode Instrument

“Me about Me”

Instructions

Consider the situations in which you find your wishes differing from those of another person. How do you usually respond to such situations? On these two pages are several pairs of statements describing possible behavioral responses. For each pair, please circle the "A" or "B" statement which is most characteristic of your own behavior. In many cases, neither the “A” nor "B" statements may be typical of your behavior; but please select the response which you would be more likely to use.

1. A. There are times when I let the other person take responsibility for solving the

problem.

B. Rather than negotiate the things on which we disagree, I try to stress those

things upon which we both agree.

2. A, I try to find a compromise solution.

B. I attempt to deal with all of the other person’s and my concerns.

3. A. I am usually firm in pursuing my goals.

B. I might try to soothe the other person’s feelings and preserve our relationship.

4. A. I try to find a compromise solution.

B. I sometimes sacrifice my own wishes for the other person’s wishes.

5. A. I consistently seek the other person’s help in working out a solution.

B. I try to do what is necessary to avoid useless tensions.

6. A. I try to avoid creating unpleasantness for myself.

B. I try to win my position.

7. A. I try to postpone the issue until I have had some time to think it over.

B. I give up some points in exchange for others.

8. A. I am usually firm in pursing my goals.

B. I attempt to get all concerns and issues immediately out in the open.

9. A. I think that differences are not always worth worrying about.

B. I make some effort to get my way.

10. A. I am firm in pursuing my goals.

B. I try to find a compromise solution.

11. A. I attempt to get all concerns and issues immediately out in the open.

B. I might try to soothe the other person’s feelings and preserve our relationship.

12. A. I sometimes avoid taking positions which would create controversy.

B. I will let the other person have some of her/his positions if she/he lets me have

some of mine.

13. A. I propose a middle ground.

B. I press to get my points made.

14. A. I tell the other person my ideas and ask him/her for his/hers.

B. I try to show the other person the logic and benefits of my position.

Please go on to the other side of this page.

15. A. I might try to soothe the other person’s feelings and preserve our relationship.

B. I try to do what is necessary to avoid useless tensions.

16. A. I try not to hurt the other person’s feelings.

B. I try to convince the other person of the merits of my position.

17. A. I am usually firm in pursuing my goals.

B. I try to do what is necessary to avoid useless tensions.

18. A. If it makes the other person happy, I might let him/her maintain his/her views.

B. I will let the other person have some of his/her positions if he/she lets me have

some of mine.

19. A. I attempt to get ail concerns and issues immediately out in the open.

B. I try to postpone the issue until I have had some time to think it over.

20. A. I attempt to work through our differences immediately.

B. I try to find a fair combination of gains and losses for both of us.

21. A. In approaching negotiations, I try to be considerate of the other person’s wishes.

B. I always lean toward a direct discussion of the problem.

22. A. I try to find a position that is intermediate between the other person’s and mine.

B. I assert my wishes.

23. A. I am very often concerned with satisfying all our wishes.

B. There are times when I let the other person take responsibility for solving the

problem.

24. A. If the other’s position seemed very important to him/her, I would try to meet

his/her wishes.

B. I try to get the other person to settle for a compromise.

25. A. I try to show the other person the logic and benefits of my position.

B. In approaching negotiations, I try to be considerate of the other person’s wishes.

26. A. I propose a middle ground.

B. I am nearly always concerned with satisfying all our wishes.

27. A. I sometimes avoid taking positions that would create controversy.

B. If it makes the other person happy, I might let him/her maintain his/her views.

28. A. I am usually firm in pursuing my goals.

B. I usually seek the other person’s help in working out a solution.

29. A. I propose a middle ground.

B. I think that differences are not always worth worrying about.

30. A. I try not to hurt the other person’s feelings.

B. I always share the problem with the other person so that we can work it out.