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Breaking the Cycle

directed by Roger Graef, 1936-; produced by Roger Graef, 1936- (New York, NY:Filmakers Library, 1997), 56 mins

fL FILMAKERS LIBRARY, INC. NEW YORK , N.Y. PRESENTSLondon

00:30[sil.]

00:35Roger Graef We spend billions locking up the system defenders who had behavior problems when they were small. If they and their parents had help early enough, the cycle of exclusion, isolation and trouble could be broken spearing endless pain and expense later on.

00:55BREAKING THE CYCLE Written and narrated by ROGER GRAEF

01:00Roger Graef Children out of control are every parent and teacher's nightmare. Hard-pressed schools can no longer contain them. As exclusion soar restless children are left at home or at risk on the streets. Exclusions now start at five or even younger. This labels children as troublemakers and blights their childhood and later life.

01:25ANGELA PIDDOCK Head Teacher Wilberforce Primary School There are times when you need to move children, but we need to look at what way we are removing them to. I think we then have to ask ourselves what’s going to happen to those children once they are excluded? And I think and I thought about this quite a lot. I think for society means you are going to have a significant number of very unhappy, violent people.

01:50[sil.]

01:55SWINDON , WILTSHIRE

02:00[sil.]

02:05Roger Graef We’ve all seen children like Dean causing trouble, embarrassing his family. Aged four, what is Dean’s future, starting school and after? We have the luxury to shake our heads, blame the parents and turn away, but it’s not just other people’s problem.

02:25SAM SMITH Group Therapist I honestly believed (inaudible ) this was baby that she wouldn’t do anything naughty or difficult. She was gonna stay placid and had very unrealistic expectations. So when she lay on her back in the middle of mother care, such as screaming and shouting, “I want to be good, I want to be good”, and failing sort of miserably and I realized I was one of those mums that I have thought, “Ah, it will never happen to me”, you know. You want to believe it's out there, you don’t want to believe it's here. And the reality is, it can be anywhere.

02:55Roger Graef At home on the outskirts of Swindon , Rachelfaces the daily ordeal of getting her three children ready to go out. Her two sons, six-year-old Duane and four-year-old Deanare far more awkward than her one-year-old daughter Becky .

03:05Rachel Stop wiping your nose out, go and get some tissue.

03:10Dean No!

Rachel Now, you can imagine what this is like in the morning, just trying to get them all ready, so I can get out of the house.Sit with Dean . It’s not you’d see obviously, he is not struggling, he’s probably (inaudible ), and his constant moment about everything. See, Duane (inaudible ) anything on him, because he would fright me.

03:35Dean Mama, change clothes.

Rachel No, let's wash your face, get this washed.

03:40[sil.]

03:45Rachel Well, stop making this (inaudible ).

03:46Dean Mummy!

03:50Rachel Get in the car. You got to stay. Okay, you’ll fell out the door.

04:00Dean Where am I going?

Rachel We’re going out. Well, I should get my purse now.

04:05Roger Graef Mums like Rachel , with several strong real children like Dean and his elder brother Duane , have an extra dilemma. Every occasion can be a source of trouble. Even if one child behaves well the other can start things going.

04:20Rachel Leave him alone. Oh my god, here they go! Duane ! Duane !

04:30Dean No, leave me.

Rachel They think they’re getting away with it, but they won’t.

04:35Duane I’ll break your mouth.

04:40Roger Graef Over time the relentless effort to keep the peace drives even patient mothers like Rachel to drastic actions that may make matters worse.

04:45Dean Mum, he kicked me.

04:50Rachel I’m trying to drive the car. Now sit up.

04:55[sil.]

05:00Rachel A space within and you both started it.

05:05Duane You started it.

Dean Yeah.

Rachel Shut up or you'll get another one. It’s not fair on Becky , because she is a good girl. She is really sort of contented in herself with. She’s taking that all in all the time. You can see her watching and, you know, observing what they’re doing. This is just gonna… If something don’t change, this is gonna be the (inaudible ). I don't think I'll be able to manage every one. This would drive me mad.

05:35Roger Graef Many children are restless, hyperactive, aggressive or have other learning or behavioral problems likely to cause trouble at school. Few have help nearby. But Wiltshireparents with infants at risk of exclusion can refer them for treatment on the ten-week course at Marlborough House inSwindon . Part of the NHS, it offers a structured program, one day a week, for both parents and children that shamefully appears unique in England and Wales . Each child has very different problems. Joseph is there because he has trouble in groups. His mother fears he won’t cope with large classes at school.

06:05DIANA Joe’s mum I was very tired and when you're very tired it’s difficult to be positive and, you know, things escalate and so I just needed to talk to somebody who wasn’t a relative, wasn’t somebody in the village or… and then it sort of snowballed and we thought, well, we got ourselves into. And we were very concerned that… that we were labeling Joe . And you feel like you failed, don’t you? Especially if you are an infant teacher, you feel like you’ve failed.

06:40Roger Graef Charlotte lives in 50 miles away on an army base. She’s already been excluded from playgroup for aggression towards other children.

06:50SASHA Charlotte’s mum Because the kids telling me (inaudible) shut out, you know, if every time she doesn’t feel (inaudible ). You know, I've never tired that. I’ve tried to ignore whenever she’s in my face, all the time she’s there, when she’s shouting like that. I’ve tried every single thing, like bribing her, sending her to bed, leaving her in a room all day, taking her toys away, throwing them in the bed, everything, but nothing works.

07:05Roger Graef Twins David and Leanne , aged six, have language and behavior problems. They go to school, unconditionally attend the unit one day a week.

07:15CLAIRE the twins’ mum They don’t understand a great deal of what you said. You can ask them something and they just don’t understand it. It’s vocabulary language like thing. They were labeled as naughty for quite a while and it wasn’t that they started going to school that they realized it, went naughty, naughty and just they didn’t quite understandable what was going on. But at home, they’re fine. In home they know the (inaudible ), they know what’s expected of them. When you take them out, things change and I just don’t watch what they do, that they can't cope. They were expelled from a playgroup, because they were said that they were too naughty.

07:40Sasha You know she’s four year… four years old, she’s been expelled from the playgroup, this is gonna be the part of her life, you know, that she can even be expelled from every school she goes to you know.

07:50Sam Smith So, I’m going to tell you a little bit about what happens here in the group today.

08:00DAY ONE

Roger Graef The work is based on positive principles designed to teach children what to do rather than what not to do. Good behavior gets positive rewards like praise and tokens, bad behavior is ignored or contained by what they call physical prompts.

08:15Parents Group

SAM SMITH Senior Group Worker Marlborough House Day Unit Coming here is going to be about you're thinking toyourself how did I respond in a certain situation and what message am I giving my child? So it will be as much about analyzing your behavior as your child’s behavior. Most of all we want to shift the label “Naughty” that has got itself very attached to your children. We don’t want them to go through their life with that label naughty. We don't want you to go for your life with the label the bad mother. It’s not a pleasant situation for each one here. And… And (inaudible ) something come with instructions, do they? I mean, most things do. You get a… You get a washing machine, it’s got a booklet, doesn’t it? It says, you know, what is what you do and this is what you do if something goes wrong with baby (inaudible ). Oh, wasn't that a big love, thank you. He’s got them to put on the side.

09:00Roger Graef The long day is tightly structured to build confidence and develop skills needed in real schools. Physical coordination, mental concentration, the ability to follow instructions, complete tasks and work with other children.

09:10Sam Smith I just think you just let to put (inaudible ). You can stand up and choose your pot now. Oh, did he put it in that one? Oh, Joe has picked up.

09:25Sam Put here.

Sam Smith Interesting. You're label are.

Sam Thank you.

Sam Smith Well, you also remember to say thank you too. Well done Sam .

09:30Roger Graef Within a tight structure children are encouraged to make choices like jam or marmite.

09:35Sam Smith Everybody needs to be watching.

Thank you.

09:40Well done David .

Sam Smith It’s very important that we think about what we do with jam and marmite. So everybody needs to look at Karen .

09:45Roger Graef By midday, ten children deemed too awkward or difficult to contain in playgroup or school sit quietly together with their hands in their laps, some for the first time in their lives. They only met two hours ago.

10:00Sam Smith Most important think that we do is praise the children. We praise the children constantly whenever they do anything good. Each time if there anything we asked them to do, we give them a token. Well done Robert .

10:15[sil.]

10:20Would you like juice or what?

10:25Joseph (ph) Juice. Thanks.

Well done, Joseph , good thinking, good boy!

10:30[sil.]

10:35Thank you.

10:40Joseph I’m going to get the token.

Thank you.

Okay.

It's a shame (inaudible ) Joseph is ready to say thank you. I’m just going to get some more juice. I’ll be back in a second.

10:50Sam Smith If a child does something that we want them to do, we lavish, praise and attention on that child, which is where the tokens are coming up. So what the child learns is either they're behaving appropriately, they will get lots of our attention. On the other hand, if a child isn’t behaving appropriately, we'll try and handle the situation it has been among the fuss as possible.

11:10Adam I’m just clear when I found, you know, she going with thistraining fixed.

11:15Sam Smith Right.

Adam I mean, we don’t see that many volume.

Sam Smith No, no.

If you did (inaudible ) teach him out to be truthful?

11:20Sam Smith Basically, we… we will contain them within the group. We use a time out chart, where we would take the child the good child lashes out to another child. We will take them to time out. We will help them to sit on time out.

11:30When you sit on a table, you sit with your hands in your lap and you keep your feet still.

11:35Joseph (ph) I can't have that.

11:40[sil.]

11:45Sam Smith We wouldn’t hold the child where they're supposed to be. So if a child needs to be playing on the mat, we will sit with them keeping them on the mat. The way that we use physical prompts, the way that we restrain the children is to beas gentle as possible with them.

11:55Well done Joseph , you are sitting… sitting quiet now, you can go back to the table.

12:00Sam Smith It’s that we’re only holding them with the force that it needs to contain them. If a child is really struggling, obviously we need to grip on time to them, but the minute they begin to relax, the minute we begin to relax, and very quickly they realize that that’s where they are going to be staying, so you might as well play with the toys rather than sit back pressing about it.

12:15Adam You will not allow to take your child out?

Sam Smith No.

12:20[sil.]

12:30Sam Smith We fall into trackless parents. Children’s naughty behavior is very easy to notice. We can’t have notice it. What tends to happen is we give children attention when they’re being naughty. We… We don’t mean to do that, but it’s very difficult to do other than that. So quite often when children being good we’ll rush away and be busy and yet when they're being naughty we'll reappear. But for a child any attention is better than no attention at all. So in some ways they actually learn to be naughty in order to get our attention. And there is no one single parent out there who is thinking, “I think I'll teach my child to be naughty today.”

13:10Sasha Yeah.

Sam Smith Lots of us are actually falling into that trap without realizing it.

13:15Roger Graef Each group activity look simple but works on many levels.

13:20Want to help out.

13:25Roger Graef Throwing to a child he names, helps David’s social and physical skills. The group activities are punctuated by quiet times and this children must settle down and learn the vital lesson how to respect each others space. By the end of the day the parents group gather behind a one-way mirror as the children here accounts of their progress and their tokens are counted. Some parents find it hard to believe their problem child could behave so well.

13:55Sam Smith I’m preparing to count the tokens now. Now obviously, the whole routine is very new to the children and it’s been a long hard day. So I just sitting still and watching tokens being counted is gonna be quite difficult to stop working quite hard that basically from the children to face in this direction. It’s always children that are sitting still and quietly that are chosen. They shouldn’t (inaudible ) to sit still are being helped at the moment. (Inaudible ), because isn't able to sit still at the moment. You will see the change of each week. They will get more used to this.

14:25Let's get Dean a big hand. Well done.

14:35Sam Smith Sometimes children find it very difficult to accept praise. It’s not always easy for child to accept praise, particularly if they're stuck with the label the naughty one or the difficult one. If they have ever heard that things said about them, sometimes they don’t really believe that you mean it when you praise them. So you might have quite a lot to overcome.Well done! So we’re talking about all the good things that you've been doing.

14:55Dean Mom, I love my (inaudible ).

15:00Alright darling.

15:05[sil.]

15:10Sam Smith Bye-bye Dean , bye-bye Kelly .

Bye-bye.

Sam Smith Bye see you next week.

15:15[sil.]

15:20I want to stay here.

We can't, we have to go home now. We're gonna go on a bus.

15:30He’s been a bit fussy and he’s fussing a little bit, so he’s had a good day.

15:40I'll help you in a minute and I'm just waiting for you to say thank you.

15:45Joseph Thank you.

That's well done, isn't it? Here we go, I'm really pleased. Josephis (inaudible ) for me. You might just take that.

15:55Roger Graef Right to the end of the day group rules are enforced step by step for as long it takes. Before leavingJoseph must do up his coat.

16:05Sam Smith When we got a child who is making a fuss, rather than focus on the fuss we'll take about the things that they're doing well. So probably we'll be saying to things him like, "Gosh well done!” Because when he done that and she will be taking to him about the fuss, we’re taking to him about the things that he is managing…

16:15Hmm…hmm…

Sam Smith …they should be taking to him about the fact that you're waiting and it was really time to go home, just we will be assuring him. Oh dear!

16:25Diana I'm… I'm…

16:30Sam Smith That was the reason, we get focusing on the behavior. Let me (inaudible ), "Oh gosh why could you say why would you stop fussing it's getting… that we can actually focus on the fuss.

16:40Oh yeah.

16:45Diana Hello, hello, nice to see you. You'll just… You say bye-bye. You come and help me and show me the way to go Joe .Come and show me… this way.

17:05[sil.]

17:10Diana I think what distressed me is that you can't pinpoint whyJoe like he is. If there was some great upsets, some great upheaval, some of the people got great traumas going on in their lives and you can see why their children are upset. Joehasn’t got any of those excuses.

17:30[sil.]

17:35One week later

Rachel No. If you let me do nicely…

Dean I want to…

17:40Rachel He does not like to having his face washed.

Roger Graef At home, preparing for the next section, Racheltries to follow the group instruction to ignore Dean's bad behavior, but he doesn’t make it easy.

17:50Rachel What you’re on.

17:55Dean My face.

Rachel You’re in your face on.

Dean No.

18:00Rachel Well, your face is on in it.

Dean And?

Rachel You mean you want your dirty face on?

Dean Yeah.

18:05Rachel No you’re not, because you're… it’s all dirt.

18:10Dean It wouldn't be ma.

Rachel Dean , shut up now, because you're getting on me nerves. Shut up. We just… I don’t know what you on about, hold on, let's hold back he is doing at videos.

18:25[sil.]

18:30DAY TWO

Diana Hello!

Hello!

18:35Diana Come let's go and find what you (inaudible ). Can you see into that put your lunchbox away. Well, Joe is able to go from the start hold on. But then he was born with a tumor in his mouth, so he had a very difficult start. So he had a surgery when he was five weeks old and it was benign tumor (inaudible), but anyhow to further surgery, here we go. So, if you're looking for something to blame, well, I really think that Joeprobably would have been a bit of a difficult character anyway.

19:05Sam Smith Boy, well done!

19:10Roger Graef Each week a parent observes behind the one-way mirror to see their child’s behavior more objectively. Joe's dadAdam , a busy executive, has come to learn what the unit hopes to achieve with his son.

19:20Pauline Mayes Because an instruction has been given and… and the way it was given takes away any option to not do it.

19:25Adam Hmm…

Pauline Mayes The children will be happy. It's not see if only Joseph she can wants to do any movement today and (crosstalk)(inaudible) will be helped (crosstalk)(inaudible) happy and happy with that…

19:35Adam Hmm…

Pauline Mayes Even when we say something…

Adam Hmm…

Pauline Mayes …you're not talking about please say…

Adam Hmm…hmm…

19:40Pauline Mayes …you'll be try to explain when doing at all, we will change, because obviously the bottom line is Joseph is your child.

19:45Adam Alright.

Pauline Mayes …and he remain in control.

19:50Adam Hmm…

Pauline Mayes And this is all about group work. It's… And some children only quite hard to actually work in a group closely with others. So it’s… it’s a really good thing to skill to learn. And I think Joseph , I think his dislike of… of joining groups will be quite valuable.

20:05Adam Hmm…

Pauline Mayes The first session I think Joe doesn’t need to here. He hasn’t, you know, hearing other mums saying some of the problem that they’d had and I think Joe hasn’t done any of those things, he hasn’t got any problems. When I saw him in the group, I was very distressed, because he finds it very difficult and I’ve not seen him like that before. We obviously just find it very difficult in groups and he finds it hard to join in. That was a surprise and at a whole kind of worms(ph) really. So I'd rather found that before students. So what’s happening is nobody is actually taking any notice of Joseph not taking part.

20:40Adam Hmm…hmm… Hmm…hmm…

Pauline Mayes And he’s looking for somebody to…

20:45Adam Yes.

Pauline Mayes …to tell him that you've to take part. He is desperately seeking to make contact, isn't he?

20:50Adam Hmm…hmm…

Pauline Mayes There is a difference in… in what we're seeing now, which is almost like want to…

20:55Adam Hmm…hmm…

Pauline Mayes …but I can't…

Adam Yeah.

Pauline Mayes …than at the beginning, which is like I don’t want to do, I’m not.

21:00Adam Hmm…

21:05Pauline Mayes How do you feel about this?

Adam Definitely sound, isn't it? Oh, you know, I'm sort of be beneficial. I can see the… the tactics you're using. Yeah. It seems quite sensible.

21:15Pauline Mayes Yeah!

21:20Diana Adam was concerned that putting Joe in that situation which is not in usually. I mean, playgroup’s more relaxed. He’s only four-and-a-half. You know, how do we precipitated the behavior to some extent, you just try and avoid situation. They deliberately build in to the day at the group so that the children learns strategies to cope with it. But he… he’s always been very frightened of parties and new things. He… He literally used to like he is in shock. His face goes green and he trembles and so I have avoided taking him to parties. I mean we’ll go for the first five minutes and then come home. And I guess we've gotta start putting him in situations and I can’t keep avoiding them.

22:00Sam Smith Joseph , who is going to be your partner?

Joseph Umm?

Diana He is gotta get used to these things. Not that he's got to grow up suddenly, you know, and he is entitled to not like going to parties, even the only person in the world didn’t like it. But he's gotta be able to cope with… with it.

22:15Sam Smith Excuse me Adam , Joseph would really like you to be his partner. Would you like to be Joseph's partner?

22:20Adam Yeah.

Sam Smith There! Sit down then, that's your back and well done.

Adam Alright.

22:25Pauline Mayes Yeah.

Adam That’s it, we’ve made at last.

Pauline Mayes But that's okay, isn't it?

Adam Hmm…hmm…

Pauline Mayes I mean, what hopefully Joseph will learn eventually, children don’t learn at the outside. You may have to do things time and time and time again.

22:35Adam Hmm…hmm…

Pauline Mayes But message to get her…

Adam Hmm…hmm…

Pauline Mayes …it’s much better to join in and to have some fun. And it is fun, this is very non-threatening.

22:40Adam Hmm…hmm…

22:45Sam Smith We shall have about a penny a day, because he can't go (inaudible ).

22:55Rachel Come on Dean share the ball with Duane .

Dean No, I'm not sharing.

23:00Rachel Rebecca wants you to go down.

Duane Rebecca push him down.

Rachel You don't gonna play with the ball.

Dean No.

23:05Rachel Let share it.

Dean No.

Roger Graef Has often happens, Dean's progress in learning to share in the group is slow to show itself at home.

23:15Dean I'll keep it.

Duane No.

Rachel We… We’ll change, right now… right now it’s Duane . I know it’s wrong like this anything just to showing that.

23:20DAY THREE

Sam Smith Sometimes well it seems enough to have taught the child a very, very important message, because the next timewhat they can think is may be I’m not making quite enough fuss. Last time I made some fuss and that managed to get the sweets. This time, I’m making some fuss, I’m not getting the sweets, what shall I do? I'll just make more fuss. So we caninadvertently teach our children to do things that we don’t want to. And that’s happening everywhere, all over the whole ofSwindon and all over the whole of England . And nobody ever wants to teach their child how to be naughty, but most of us manage it in one situation or another.

24:00Roger Graef In the week between sessions Rachel tries topractice what she has learned about not giving in. She has asked Dean to put his bowl on the sink.

24:10Rachel You simply sloppy no.

Dean No ma, I don't.

24:15Rachel Well, I'm not doing it.

Dean Oh no ma.

24:20Rachel Come on just put it in the sink and not be…

Dean No.

Rachel Normally for a quiet life, I would put in myself. I'll do ask him to do it.

24:25Dean No.

Rachel But by now, I would have putting that just to shut him up. So told me to just shut up.

24:30Dean Please mummy.

Rachel No, it won’t hurt you to do it.

24:35Dean You do it.

Duane Mum.

24:40Rachel You see, you'll be naughty.

Duane Mum.

Rachel Yes. You naughty. Alright. Come on then, if you can’t do, I’ll do it for you. Up.

24:55Dean Ma, ma.

25:00Rachel Alright done.

Dean Ma, open.

Rachel No, you don't pull it out.

25:05Dean No.

Rachel No, keep carrying that (inaudible ) out of the way me. You leave it in there. That’s all right. It’s got to be washed anyway. Well, now you've done. Now, we you can go and watch (inaudible ).

25:21Dean No.

25:25DAY FOUR

25:30[sil.]

25:45Excuse me Dean , now when you’ve done this, what they have(crosstalk)(inaudible).

25:55[sil.]

26:00Alright, well Charlotte let's go back to (crosstalk)(inaudible).

Wow!

26:05Well done Dean ! Dean , I'm gonna put a token in your pot.

26:15[sil.]

26:20It’s time for you to get out of the bath now.

26:25Roger Graef In the role play of points of difficulty, parents are taught to avoid bribes if their child are bathed. Treat shouldcome when they comply.

26:35Diana When you've gotten into your bedroom then we will have our two stories.

26:40Sam Smith Hmm…

Diana Oh, good, you’re getting out, that’s well done! There’s a token in box, brilliant. I'll get the towel.

26:50Roger Graef For children with behavioral problems constant praise means outburst are surprisingly rare. David has left the circle to get his jumper. Failure to grasp the rules has already earned him a bad reputation at school.

27:05Claire There are people out there that will say things to your children that will make you feel bad about themselves.

27:10Yeah.

Claire David has caused stupid by some of the girls in his class at school.

Hmm…hmm…

27:15CLAIRE David’s Mum And I didn't understand quite a while what was going on that he suddenly did not want to go to school anymore.

Hmm…hmm…

27:20Claire And he got quite upset, crying, I always actually drag him into the paths, and then it took me while because he can’t talk well, but he did say…

27:25Hmm…hmm…

Claire You know that they so… so and so and so… they’vecalling me stupid.

27:30Hmm…hmm…

27:35Rachel People speak this children as stupid.

Hmm…

Rachel But they are not stupid. They are lot clever than and that's the way they react.

27:40Yeah.

27:45Rachel It's true, they weren't?

They were (inaudible ) ruling this way they would.

27:46Rachel Yeah.

Hmm…Hmm…

Rachel You think… You think…

27:50That's the main point. Yeah.

Rachel And they couldn't twist (inaudible ) I think as could they.

27:52Well done Sam …

27:55Few more moments.

DAY FIVE

Well done!

Roger Graef Along with pre-school tasks like reading stories, making music and art, the training also focuses on ordinary tasks, which can set the whole relationship between the child and his parents or teachers.

28:10Charlotte I will play out.

Sam Smith That's what Charlotte . Let's all, let's go and play outand do the…

28:15Right.

Sam Smith …because you won't do until Joseph has finished.

Pauline Mayes And this is what happened in school you see, will be given instruction and will be left.

28:20Adam Alright.

Pauline Mayes So Sam's gonna test on that is always gonna help him. To me I like the way she is watching him and see what's going on, but she is aware.

28:30Adam Yes. I'm aware of that too.

28:35Pauline Mayes And you're aware of that boy (inaudible ) yes.

28:37It won't be the first.

28:40PAULINE MAYES Manager Marlborough House Day Unit It won’t be the first time…

Adam Hmm…

Yeah.

Pauline Mayes …it actually happened.

Adam Yeah…ah…

Pauline Mayes What would happen though is Joseph would have to clear out.

28:45Adam Hmm…alright.

Pauline Mayes Some, he’s not enjoying into his negotiating…

28:50Adam Hmm…right.

Pauline Mayes …Come on Joseph …

Adam Hmm…hmm…

Pauline Mayes …this is what you should be doing. No one know, yes and yes you are.

Adam Yeah.

28:55Pauline Mayes Which I think happens at home sometimes, isn’t it?

Adam Definitely, yeah.

Pauline Mayes Yeah.

Adam Far too much negotiations…

29:00Pauline Mayes Hmm…hmm…

Sam Smith When Joseph has finished his washing up, he'll be able to go out and play.

29:05Pauline Mayes But if you look at the difficulties arising with these children here now…

Adam Hmm…hmm…

29:10Pauline Mayes …you're trying to imagine what they would be like in the process (inaudible ).

29:12Adam Yeah.

Pauline Mayes Is anyone teacher and plus one assistant.

29:15Adam Hmm…hmm…

Pauline Mayes At the moment you got with four staff in there and two moms.

Adam Hmm…hmm…

29:20Pauline Mayes You know, it's actually apart from the ratio.

Adam Hmm…hmm…

Pauline Mayes (Inaudible ) question how to reach their targetand got time to chase your children in the classroom, and so other children’s were being withdrawn from there, the classroom situation.

29:30Adam Hmm…hmm…

Pauline Mayes What we are trying to do is to help Joseph to think this through that you know, what is I should be doing.

29:35Adam Hmm…hmm…

Pauline Mayes Once you get into the negotiation to get lots from that.

29:40Adam And she’s not giving the eye contact….

Pauline Mayes And she’s not giving the eye contact…

Adam Yeah.

Pauline Mayes …which is really important.

29:45Well done.

Pauline Mayes …(crosstalk)(inaudible) sound actually kick some.

Adam Alright.

Pauline Mayes Yeah.

29:50Ten minutes later

Pauline Mayes And this is something that Joseph does find very difficult. He’s got a long list of tactics that he draws on…

29:55Adam Hmm…hmm…

Pauline Mayes …to get out and doing things and right now, you know he is blowing his nose and he's weeping that all over the surround…

30:00Adam Hmm…hmm…

Pauline Mayes …it's something that you know, we don’t… we don't like…

Adam Hmm…hmm…

Well done.

Pauline Mayes …like the crying (crosstalk)

30:05Adam Hmm…hmm…

Pauline Mayes I want to go to toilet. I’m gonna wet myself. I’m gonna be sick, all those certain things he comes out with, but he is not gonna get out of it by doing them.

30:10Well done, I’m going to give you another token, you're working really hard there.

30:15Adam I’ve seen some of these tactics and about Joe's(inaudible ).

30:21Pauline Mayes Okay. Yeah. And ignoring this coming down.

Adam Hmm…hmm… Yes

Pauline Mayes To gain at home you would get to join.

30:25Adam Yeah, he tent to pick up.

Pauline Mayes Yes. Yeah.

30:30Ten more minutes later

Put on this side.

30:35Well done Joseph , I'm gonna give another token. Just two more cups.

30:40Pauline Mayes What do you think if he done at home. He was going to do some of that he didn’t want to…

30:45Adam Hmm…hmm… Yes

Pauline Mayes …and he wanted to go out. What would you do?

Adam We do it with him. That's better, if someone just got him to do it entirely about some and anytime that going from something else and we'd end up finishing and that actually happen. Hmm…hmm…

30:55Pauline Mayes So what was the message that you actually given Joseph , that if you perhaps if he kicks up long enough then you will do it for him or…

31:00Adam I guess so, yeah.

31:05Pauline Mayes Hmm…hmm…

Adam Hmm…hmm…

Another ten minutes later

31:10Pauline Mayes You looked at the other children though down(ph) she taken their clues from, from the adults and then…

Adam Hmm…hmm…

31:15Pauline Mayes …because the adults are not making a fuss…

Adam Hmm…hmm…

Pauline Mayes …umm…about Joseph and if that’s been for you to remember at home with you other one.

31:20Adam Hmm…hmm…

Pauline Mayes If…if you're not making it fuss and the… the younger one while she take that clues from you.

31:25Adam Alright.

Pauline Mayes What we want to try and do is to teach him to actually keep focused on what we are doing.

31:30Adam Hmm…hmm…

Pauline Mayes And if we consider all children here got very short attention spans.

31:35Adam Hmm…hmm…

Pauline Mayes umm… that she is doing very, very well.

Adam Yeah, yeah.

31:40[sil.]

31:45Pauline Mayes What you feel like doing at the moment. Do you want to get in there and stop it or what?

31:50Adam I think yes, really.

31:55[sil.]

32:15Sam Smith Just try to do these. That's it. Well done, good Well done Joseph . I’m gonna give you one token. Well done. Put it on the side. Now, you've finished. Good boy. Well done Joseph.

32:35Pauline Mayes Well done, he is finished. Did you hear that.

Adam Yeah.

32:40[sil.]

32:55Pauline Mayes Getting(ph) consequence of actions, spilled the water mop it up.

Sam Smith That's the best that came out of the floor Josephgot…

33:00Pauline Mayes He has got a bit of water, isn't it?

33:05Adam Hmm…hmm…

33:10Sam Smith Oh, I could have handled it, oh will he stop fussing out for goodness sake, please… please do this, but at that time he’s getting lots and lots of place when he did manage to do it up he was slam down on the table.

33:20Adam Yeah. It’s just obviously distressing watching him.

Sam Smith Yeah.

Adam He just ah…

At the end…

Adam (crosstalk)(inaudible) you know he cried there.

33:25Sam Smith Yeah. But I really wanted him to have a go finishing that all by himself. And I think that if I ever got repeat it, he would start on his on a lot quicker.

33:35Two hours later

33:40Pauline Mayes He’s gone from getting lots and lots of physical prompts, verbal prompts to those being decreased managing to do all by himself.

33:50Adam Yeah.

Pauline Mayes But he is not… he is not a confident little boyand that she stops him from doing at all these tasks being bright doesn't necessarily mean to say he's gonna be confident.Anxiety can get in the way, your own expectation can get in the way. The fear of not being able to complete the task or knowing exactly what was expected of him. He’s actually doing very well then now and carrying in fact he's backed off slightly you know, he got, he had lots of praise to stop at least you know, even looking for it now and despite of being a really boring job. He’s actually doing it and doing it well.

34:25Roger Graef When enforcing the rules, staff avoid looking directly at the children to make clear that instructions must be followed without discussion. But they seem making eye contact is a vital positive tool in holding the children’s attention.

34:40Good boy Joe !

Sam Smith It really is essential that you make a real effort to engage with your child, so it's actually about maybe crutching down to their level because sometimes when they are talking from up there, we’re not meeting their eyes. When we… once we crashed eyes it’s much easier to make some eye contact with them, to look at them and say "Gosh you worked really hard at that. So your moving close and you are making the eye contact immediately.

35:05[sil.]

35:10Now, Joseph just had a bit of a difficult day, but this.

35:15Sam Smith I’m really pleased with the children when they work really hard, the jobs they doing so. And it was a very, to the very long time Joseph but you didn’t give up you managed it. Well done.

35:25Pauline Mayes He is listening to you know.

35:30Let's, let's see what your mother and dad has said.

35:35Pauline Mayes He’s acting like…

Adam Hmm…hmm…

Pauline Mayes …(crosstalk)(inaudible) Joseph pleased it. (crosstalk)(inaudible).

35:45[sil.]

35:50Roger Graef The end of each session is a turning point. Volatile children like Dean have behaved well for more than five tiring hours. But can he sustain his progress outside? With Rachel ,or with his friends on the streets, on his brother Duane , who may undermine his attempts at self-discipline.

36:15Duane I will.

Rachel I've said you could go out to your bed after you get(ph) your tea…

36:20DUANE Dean's older brother Oh good that will be going out… you do… you do…

36:25Rachel Duane just doesn't keep on…

36:30Duane No I don't like go…

Rachel Can you see what he was trying to say.

36:35Dean Mummy.

Rachel Just sit on the table.

Dean Mummy.

Rachel What?

Dean I'm not going through(ph) all.

36:40Rachel You see what he was trying to say like going up. You just copying Duane , if Duane was to make no sense, you stay enough pass thing what you’ll say.

36:50Dean Mom.

Rachel Yeah.

Duane (inaudible )

36:52Rachel You're playing (inaudible ) job yeah.

36:53Duane No way.

36:55Rachel I'll just do our duty normally if you doesn’t do it… just go upstairs.

37:00Duane No yeah.

Sam Smith I guess what you can do is make it clear in the beginning what you're gonna giving tokens for and that’s perfectly okay to do that what she said. Mummy is gonna start and dad is gonna start using tokens at home. We are going to be using tokens for and one of the things you could say is notmaking a fuss. So in that situation if you so kick under the table before the other one has a chance to kick back, you could say well done Dean you didn’t make a fuss.

37:20Rachel Tell you what Dean .

37:25Dean Oh.

Rachel (inaudible ) do you know why? Do you know why? As you are ignoring Duane not taking any nuisance that's he's making. It’s alright.

37:40Dean Yes.

Duane Mom.

DAY SIX Parents Group

37:45Sam Smith I was thinking Rachel , I thought you're more positive a few weeks ago.

Rachel Hmm…hmm… I think this is how (inaudible ) this morning.

37:51Sam Smith Yeah, you've doing, you’re looking much more stressed, you know… you know what happens now here, are you?

37:55Rachel No. I… I…sometimes I think it's with Dean I stressed with (inaudible ) situation again and I can’t say here.

38:05Sam Smith Yeah.

Rachel (crosstalk)(inaudible) I can cry very loud…

Sam Smith You do, you actually have been very upset.

38:10Rachel Hmm…hmm…

Sam Smith Do you want that time out the group?

38:15[sil.]

38:20Rachel Just he's driving(ph)around me, driving me mad.

38:30Slowly, slowly, very slowly, slowly, very slowly (inaudible ).

38:55[sil.]

39:00Dean Come on, good bike.

39:05Rachel Trying for the hope(ph) back on the (inaudible ).

39:06Dean Oh no.

Rachel No, I've asked you to do. You put that off. You look cool with the glasses on, and then, yeah can you see where are you going? Oops.

39:20DAY SEVEN

39:25Let's, let me do you can cut that in part now.

39:30Roger Graef After lunch during quiet time, the children spent time alone on their mats. It shows the progress that they have made adapting to the unit structured approach. After seven weeks, Joseph is relaxed into it. He finds it easier to be with other children like David . Both boys can now be corrected without a drama. Crucially for school, they're learning how to sit quietly and how to wait their turn. For those children considered hyperactive or behaviorally disturbed, this is a major achievement. Without these help, they could go out to special schools or even be given drugs to manage them. Yet in two decades, this unit has rarely had to use medication to calm the children.

40:15Sam Smith Excuse me Dean , I'm very pleased with you (inaudible ) I'm waited. Well done, because I was quite a long time on that telephone, wasn’t I?

40:20Dean Wrong way…

Sam Smith It’s the wrong way up that’s right well done.

40:25Dean Now it right.

Sam Smith Yeah. I bet you really pleased with yourself as sitting and waiting. It's time now for you to go and play with (inaudible). Well done Dean .

40:40DAY EIGHT

Roger Graef As the next school term looms only a few months away, the group regime moves onto more challenging tasks. Within the greater freedom, the rules and boundaries are still maintained in a positive way. David’s problem with painting is it used to wear a smock to protect his cloths.

41:00David ?

41:05Roger Graef This battle of rules(ph) lasted for a quarter of an hour.

41:10[sil.]

41:20Whoops sorry!

41:25[sil.]

41:30Roger Graef Such resistance would not be in favor in school,but at the unit, the unit's praise for settling down to the task at last.

41:40[sil.]

41:45I give you token if you are doing your painting.

Wow, well done Joseph , you working on.

41:50[sil.]

41:55DAY NINE

David It's like ice skating.

Like ice skating, isn't it?

42:00[sil.]

42:05Right David , you ready cope down, off you go.

42:10It's got go white as same as me. Whoops, you again just done of your feet. I'm going to let go Joseph . Well done.

42:20Diana He is calmer, he is calm.

42:25[sil.]

42:30Diana I don’t worry about taking him into public now really. Sometimes upon you, it's gonna be a difficult situation I would have avoided it.

42:35…some clean cloths, Joseph .

42:40Here we go. Right. You’re ready for me to let you go.

42:45Yeah.

Right you stay listen now…

42:50(inaudible ).

42:51It was funny when you slipped.

42:55Joseph is very brilliant boy he says.

You’re Joseph good boy Joseph .

43:00Sam Smith Well done Joseph , well done Dean . Well doneJoseph , well done Dean .

43:05RACHEL and MARK Dean’s parents

43:10Rachel The group has done him some good job, you definitely you know. Before he wouldn't stop doing nothing, he wouldn't allow to dressing, we couldn't bath him, take him to bed and I think he'll now do, but he is changed in that way, didn’t he?

43:20Mark He'll comes to me a lot more now and he never used to be like that…

43:25Rachel No. but he, how he’s behaving in that, that's I could manage is when the food goes flying and the noise and the language comes out of that I thought might be. Yes, he has done him some good. He’s not perfect mind you that more good is.

43:45Dean Davis . Good boy.

43:50Roger Graef To last, the positive approach needs to be applied both by Dean’s family and teachers with large classes, this is not always easy.

43:55Now, it's a big shower…

44:00Roger Graef Cathy from the unit sits into see how Dean has changed?

44:05[sil.]

44:10HELEN McKENNA Supervisor Pinehurst Pre-School I had some of my staff say you know, and really you know he’s sodisruptive and oh god it’s Dean's time come in today and oh dear, let's all you know gets ourselves together and ready for this. And we have continued meetings throughout the term andDean was on the agenda for at least two terms. He really did cause disturbances within the group. And you have to be careful because it does rebel, but we've got over that and of course obviously with the help he’s been getting outside the school. Dean has, has come on a treat. He has become veryvery sensible of the fact that if you help it’s good fun. And of course he starts in nursery school in September and he’s ready. I mean he will be ready now. And we’ll be sad to see him go, which I have to be honest to say that about nine months ago, I would be never thought I would be saying that now.

45:10Roger Graef Joseph’s behavior has improved as well. As it has for the others in the group this has changed the atmosphere at home.

45:20…holding to the rope.

45:25Rachel I’m trying hard to have more fun with him. I’ve always, I have been away for a while, because I didn’t give at work till he was three, but I've been got this two years before he has gone to school and the way it didn’t work out and it wasn’t fun all the way and I didn’t keep house beautifully tight you know I wasn’t making jam all the thing that I was going to do when I was at home that was a great disappointed and I went through a bit of a bad patch myself thinking hang on I'm going to be superb housewife, I thought, I thought it was going to be so easy umm… and I’m really realizing that hung in the house. When you got five months left for the job before he goes to school and make the most of it. I think… I think we laugh more than we did.

46:05[sil.]

46:20Diana It’s pretty good. Well done Dean , well done Joseph .Well done group wonderful.

46:25Roger Graef But Joseph's entry to school is not straightforward. Ironically, the fact that he's been to the day unit has made the school more cautious. He will not attend full time, until he shows he can cope with its demand.

46:40Dean Yeah… yeah… it's fine.

46:45Diana I don’t know you go very defensive and you're saying it isn’t my fault, but you are bound to think really it is.

46:55DAY TEN

47:00Roger Graef Over the ten sessions, staff gradually with draw from the children. At times on the last day, they leave the room all together.

47:10Pauline Mayes This group has been one of the easier groups that we have for a long, long time. We have had less acting out from some of these children. We've not had the sever and potentially… we had in the past up lasted for an hour, two hours. Some of these children have responded just so quickly to the positive reinforcement you can take six to nine weeks before we actually feel we are actually getting anywhere.

47:40[sil.]

47:45Pauline Mayes To this particular group for whatever reason I don’t know they actually responded really well.

47:50Also come back here Sam , Sam move back in because I just gonna stay how pleased I'm with Sam Sara , because Samreally wants…

47:55Roger Graef The unit's overall aim is to encourage the children’s independence, to help them absorb the lessons they have learned there in order to manage themselves as they must do to succeed in school. On the last day Joe and Dean team up to control the Sam's exuberance.

48:10So, excuse me Dean I wouldn't take any notice of Sam , you need to look this way Dean .

48:15Roger Graef In the final parents group, mothers described how much their children have achieved the changes they had hoped for.

48:25What about you lots, because you are the one that put in all the hard work. How do you feel they changed.

48:30Sasha I come on (inaudible ) Sam .

48:31Right, I think it was.

Sasha Ah… I have been off then about five weeks now, and now it’s looks praising if it's like everybody turns around and looks as if he say like you buy (inaudible ) or whatever but I think to myself well at least if I could praise my child fault.

48:45Yes.

Sasha Like if you saw the other kids then you absolutely (inaudible ) and Charlotte is like something (inaudible ) I don't like my kid is behaving. Never mind.

49:00Do you feel… what you feel inside more positive aboutCharlotte now.

Sasha Yeah. I've got bunch of confidence now while I'm dealing with that.

49:05Sam Smith Do you have them one day a week. She… just expect this may that changes. See the efforts that you put in your home, because it wouldn't have changed. Just that, just that won't work with one day a week it would not have brought about the changes that you listed up there unless you are giving not on us.

49:15Diana And you said what you hope for after this 10 weeks and that's it was sort of asking for the moon sort of things some of the things we’re listing, but actually some of the changes have happened.

49:25Sam Smith Hmm…

Diana I'm sold on it

49:30Row, row, row your boat. Gently down the stream. Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily. Life is but a dream. Row, row, row your boat. Gently down the stream. Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily. Life is but a dream.

50:00Well done and it's time to shake hands through (crosstalk)(inaudible). Yes Sam , thank you Sam .

50:05The producers wish to thank: The staff and families at Marlborough House Day Unit Swindon and Marlborough NHS Trust associate director and camera ALAN JAMES additional photography VAUGHAN MATTHEWS DAVID WALTERSRICHARD GIBB LYNDSAY DODD sound CARDEN TAFTCHRISTINE FELCE ROGER STAMP dubbing mixer ROBIN FELLOWS colourist COLIN PETERS online editor NEIL HUNTER post production NATS Network First titles THE LOOK title music SELVIN LAUX research ROSE NEWMANproduction assistant SARAH DONE production managementDEBBIE KERMODE JANI BEVAN production accountantCAROLINE GAUKROGER assistant editor DANIEL SCHWALM co-producer LOL LOVETT executive producerROGER JAMES editor STEVE STEVENSON produced and directed by ROGER GRAEF © CARIJON UK Productions MCMXCVI A CARLTON UK productions FILMS OF RECORD Co-production Cte