essay

How I Came to be

Racial and ethnic diversity in the United States of America nowadays is unprecedentedly greater than anywhere else in the world. While it offers the possibility for the representatives of different ethnic groups to exchange the long-established traditions and generally contribute to cultural and phenotypic diversity of the nation, it also fuels wide patterns of discrimination and attitudinal barriers. A cultural relativity approach needs to be adopted in order to comprehend the phenomena of race and ethnicity and suspend unfair biases and judgmental attitudes. One's ancestral origins, heritage, family traditions, ethnic customs and social environment shaped by the influence of behavioral norms commonly accepted in a certain ethnic community greatly influence a person's identity, personality and further interaction with the local and global communities.

Coming from Indonesia, the country scattered over thousands of islands and ethnically comprising of over 300 different ethnic groups, I have grown to be appreciative of the cultural diversity and its positive influence of shaping an individual's open mindset and respect for others. Although the influence of Western values and attitudes on Indonesian culture and interpersonal communication cannot be overrated, our people manage to preserve basic family and social values which were established historically and form the foundation of interpersonal relations and public behavior. I was brought up with the traditional family values instilled in my initial understanding of family as the central institution. For example, members of our family are ranked by age rather than sex or status. Thus, the eldest male of the family is the most influential family member, whose advice is to be followed and whose appreciation is the most important indication of a younger family member's success. Indonesian parents equally take care of their child and equally remain in the position of honor and respect: mothers make it their first priority not only to take their children through basic developmental stages, but also to educate them about cultural values, the sense of responsibility, and contribute to their positive interaction with other community members. Fathers, in their turn, contribute to their kids' welfare and are very affectionate about sharing their life experience and wisdom with their offspring. I was brought up with the feeling of being secured and protected by my family, however, Indonesian family values do not intend for a child to be raised in a “greenhouse” - children learn the importance of hard work, determination and patience early in life. One of my family traditions includes preserving our national culture in terms of arts: every family member is skilled in some type of our traditional Indonesian craft and dedicates some free time to create various art objects. Therefore, I grew up nurtured, but taught to appreciate hard work, enthusiasm, diversity and family values. I have a great respect for other people, especially for elders. I respect the features of my ethnic identity and am prepared to observe other cultures and learn some important aspects from them. My parents have also raised me to be rather self-critical and continuously push myself for self-improvement and becoming a better person who is adoptive to changes, appreciative of human diversity and respectful to others. Of course, family was a primary institution for me to learn the traditions and values at a young age, and this helped me to enter a larger social community.

Entering a larger community as I first went to school and expanding my communication circle to other families and ethnic groups naturally required me to know more about social norms and behaviors, as well as helped me learn about certain nuances of interpersonal communication outside the family along the way. Stretching my interaction from family to my domestic community as I grew up showed me what different physical characteristics, family traditions and practices and religious motives other people in my local area had. For example, I was able to see that similar respect for age maintained in the society. Indonesian naming practices differ from one ethnic group to another. For example, in my area children are given one name, while in some other ethnic groups children can adopt the names of both their mother and father. Unlike American practice, married women in Indonesia do not necessarily take the last name of their husband upon marriage, but mostly add it after their own last name or maintain their own family name even after marriage. This, nevertheless, does not change the nature of spouse relationships, as the husband is the head of the family regardless the last name his wife carries. Family values stay nearly the same around Indonesian regions: big families predominantly live under one roof, personal and private property is subordinated to common wealth and possessions, and collective family interests are prioritized more than individual. Most families are Muslim, Islam being the traditional Indonesian religion, although separate ethnic groups are Protestant or Roman Catholic. Religion plays an important role in family and community life, which is why it also strongly influences political and economic peculiarities of the specific regions. Although Indonesians are respectful and tolerant towards ethnic diversity, some tensions may occur on the religious basis. Therefore, as I observed the diversity and key predominant features of interpersonal interactions on the community level, it enriched my identity with tolerance towards other ethnic group representatives. Simultaneously, growing in my native community strengthened my cultural values and made me more inclined towards preserving my ethnic traditions, which, in its turn, made me more vulnerable in terms of observing cultural norms and family traditions drastically different from my native ones, and increased the risks of me becoming a target of oppression when it comes to gender roles and my identity within a foreign community.

Although many Americans, as a reault of complex ancestral origins, have multiple identities nowadays (Perez and Hirschman), I do not belong to the social identity group of people who have privilege in the United States of America. While people who belong to the American privileged groups, such as whites, Christians, middle-aged, middle class or English native speakers do not necessarily realize their dominant group membership, I realize that my racial and ethnic identity is virtually limited to the community of people of the same ancestry and cultural values as mine. Therefore, I become a target of oppression, and my family-instilled values and behavioral models have stronger likelihood to be labeled as odd and abnormal. This holds particularly true when it comes to gender roles. Having been raised in a family where the eldest male is given more honor and authority, I grew up to view male members of the family as predominantly wiser and more deserving respect than their female counterparts. Recent American trend for feminism and women empowerment inconveniences my choices. From one hand, I was raised to be ambitious and enthusiastic with the sense of protection and safety granted to me by male family members at the same time, which is why I look up to the authoritative male figures throughout my life path. From another, being open and adoptive to changes, I grow to accept the shifts in social values of the country where I currently reside. Therefore, in order to conform to the expectations of agents of oppression and maintain my racial and ethnic identity, I need to adopt the Targets Survival skill set (Nieto and Boyer), which basically comprises two ways of behavior: communicate with the representatives of the Agent group, and fit their stereotypes. This way, I can become more knowledgeable of the peculiarities involved in the gender role construction which are unfamiliar or unusual to me, and preserve my own identity at the same time.

Therefore, ancestral origins and heritage along with their components greatly influence one's racial and ethnic identity, construction of gender roles and their behavioral models. While preserving the individual features of minor racial and ethnic group in a foreign community may lead to certain inconveniences and challenges, it is important to be knowledgeable on the factors which shape one's identity and personality and use cultural relativity approach for the privileged country residents to contribute to cultural and phenotypic diversity of the nation, and minor ethnic group representatives to maintain their identity and cultural values instilled in the family and local community. This is all that has contributed into making who I am today.