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Upond completingd myd self-assessmentd Id dod ind factd believed Id haved thed emotionald intelligenced
tod bed ad successfuld leader.d Id thinkd partd ofd beingd ad successfuld leaderd isd beingd abled tod pickd upd
ond emotionsd changingd andd differentd personalities,d althoughd thisd isd twod thingsd ond ad listd longd
ofd skillsd it'sd importantd tod haved somed ofd thesed featuresd asd beingd ad leaderd involvesd havingd self-
awarenessd ofd others.d Ind myd timed ofd beingd ind ad workd placed Id haved sod manyd leadersd whod faild
tod haved emotionald intelligenced asd ad skill.d Manyd ofd myd currentd leadersd Id haved ond myd teamd
reallyd lackd somed ofd thesed skillsd liked havingd empathyd andd self-awarenessd ford othersd feelings.d
Thesed skillsd ared extremelyd portabled asd youd cand taked itd tod manyd differentd careers.d Afterd doingd
myd self-assessmentd Id believed thatd Id wouldd bed abled tod bed ad successfuld leaderd ind thed future.d Id
wouldd knowd howd tod bed emotionallyd connectedd tod myd employeesd Id wouldd taked thered concernsd
andd feelingsd intod consideration.d Thered ared ad lotd ofd bigd companiesd thatd ared outd thered thatd dod
notd cared aboutd howd theird employeesd ared treatedd alld theyd cared aboutd isd thed money.d Ifd Id wasd tod
everd startd myd ownd businessd thatd isd somethingd nod oned wouldd everd haved tod worryd about.d Atd
myd lastd jobd thed managersd wered notd veryd goodd atd all.d Theyd alwaysd saidd theyd wered thered ifd youd
neededd anythingd andd theyd wouldd alwaysd helpd ifd youd neededd themd tod butd whend thed timed
came,d theyd wered neverd thered andd theyd didd notd cared ifd thed stored wasd readyd whend itd wasd timed
tod open.d Thered wered manyd timesd whend Id wouldd god tod themd andd telld themd thatd Id neededd helpd
becaused Id hadd sod muchd tod dod thatd myd sectiond wouldd notd bed readyd ind timed andd theyd wouldd
justd sayd okd dod whatd youd can.d Whend Id wouldd askd ford themd tod sendd someoned overd tod help,d
theyd alwaysd saidd theyd didn’td haved anyone.d Whend otherd workersd wouldd ask,d theyd alwaysd hadd
someoned availabled tod sendd overd thed managersd hadd favoritesd andd onlyd wantedd tod helpd them.d Id
believed thatd thed skillsd tod bed ad leaderd ared veryd importantd andd playd ad bigd partd ind thed typed ofd
leaderd youd willd becomed oned day.d actuallyd didd scored welld ond thed self-assessment,d howeverd
basedd ond myd ownd personald experience,d Id wouldd considerd myselfd and "effectived enough"d typed
leader.d Id haved ledd andd stilld leadd ind differentd arenas.d Id assumed ad leadershipd roled ind myd homed
lifed withd kidsd andd wife.d Id assumed ad leadershipd roled whiled coachingd youthd sports.d Id alsod
assumed ad leadershipd ind ad workd environmentd asd I'md leadingd projects.
-Atd home,d Id seed myselfd somewhatd forcedd intod thisd roled withd myd familyd andd it'sd notd ad badd
thing.d Thisd isd greatd becaused havingd childrend andd gettingd marriedd hasd taughtd med thatd leadingd
isn'td easyd ord rewardingd (tod thed leader)d mostd ofd thed time.d Ind thisd environment,d though,d thered isd
nod givingd upd becaused yourd familyd dependsd ond you.
-Coachingd youthd sportsd requiresd leadershipd skillsd becaused thed youngd livesd beingd touchedd
mightd carryd somed ofd thed skilld learnedd today,d withd themd ford thed restd ofd theird lives.d Tryingd tod
layd ad blueprintd ofd sportsmanship,d trustingd teammates,d andd teachingd ad "whatd youd putd ind tod
what,d isd whatd you'lld getd outd ofd it"d mentalityd isd keyd tod me.d Id mustd practiced thisd myselfd ford thed
kidsd tod believed andd knowd it'sd true.
-Whiled ind thed workd environmentd I'ved beend fortunated enoughd tod leadd manyd projects.d Ind
projectd management,d thered ared differentd techniquesd ord methodsd tod determined thed scope,d workd
efforts,d implementation,d etc,d etc.d Ind thisd area,d Id generallyd leadd basedd ond thed groupd needs.d I'md
givend ad desiredd state.d So,d thed groupd hasd decidedd theyd haved "ABC"d butd theyd wantd "aBcLT"d
Becaused thered ared sod manyd chanced thed groupd mayd wantd tod stopd atd anyd otherd lettersd theyd
didn'td calld outd originally,d I'md thered tod remindd themd ofd thed initiald goald andd helpd guided themd
thatd goald ind whateverd timed theyd saidd itd shouldd take.d So,d myd maind functiond hered isd tod keepd thed
groupd ond trackd tod andd remindd theird leaderd ofd thed ultimated target.d Yes,d afterd goingd throughd thed
resultsd presentedd byd myd selfd assessmentd test,d Id believed thatd Id cand proved tod bed ad greatd leaderd
withd highd leveld ofd emotionald intelligenced tod handled andd managed thed employeesd andd regulated
myd ownd emotionsd .d Afterd ad criticald analystsd ofd thed selfd assessmentd exercised myd scored ond alld
attributesd fallsd betweend 9d andd 10d whichd makesd med ad persond withd goodd amountd ofd emotionald
intelligenced ifd judgedd ond thesed attributesd mentionedd aboved viz,d selfd awareness,d selfd
management,d empathy,d sociald skills,d andd motivator.d Id scored 9d ond selfd managementd whichd
meansd thatd Id cand controld myd caprices,d whimsd andd desiresd andd focusd myd energyd ond aspectsd
andd activitiesd whichd ared significantlyd importantd ford me.d Id cand regulated myd emotionsd veryd
welld asd Id scored 9d ond selfd awareness.d Moreoverd myd scored ind otherd attributesd isd alsod
satisfactoryd enoughd tod maked med and emotionallyd intelligentd person
Thed traitsd vizd conscientiousness,d agreed ability,d selfd awarenessd andd socializing/d extroversiond
ared thed importantd skillsd fromd thed aboved mentionedd componentsd thatd willd assistd andd supportd
med ind beingd ad mored inclusived leader.d Thesed traitsd willd helpd med tod maintaind ad healthyd
relationshipd withd myd followersd ord employeesd .d Thesed traitd willd helpd med tod regulated andd
modifyd thed behaviord ofd employeesd byd resonatingd withd theird problemsd andd issuesd whichd helpsd
tod developd and understandingd withd themd andd henced assistsd ind becomingd and inclusived leader.
Yes,d ind myd pastd experienced Id haved workedd understandd variousd leadersd andd afterd analysisd Id
foundd ad commond traitd ind alld ofd themd whichd maded themd ad badd leader.d Thisd traitd wasd theird
inabilityd tod understandd thed needsd andd desiresd ofd followersd dued tod whichd theyd failedd tod gaind
thed commitmentd andd supportd fromd theird followers.d Theyd failedd tod created and inclusived
leadershipd environmentd dued tod failured tod created ad sensed ofd belongingd amongd theird followers.d
Thisd attributed wasd alsod ad indicationd ofd theird weakd emotionald intelligenced ability.
Thed skillsd associatedd withd beingd and inclusived leaderd ared quited portabled asd itd justd requiresd thed
effortsd andd timed ofd leaderd tod listend tod theird followers,d allowd themd tod expressd themselves,d
shared theird feedbackd andd fulfilld theird desiresd byd identifyingd themd throughd theird behavior.d
Beingd ad inclusived leaderd callsd ford havingd ad goodd amountd ofd interpersonald andd motivationald
skillsd tod maintaind ad goodd relationshipd withd followers.d Id can'td sayd thatd thisd assessmentd kindd ofd
maded med questiond ad fewd thingsd asd fard asd thed pointd ofd sayingd thatd Id rankedd highd andd
emotionald intelligenced andd leadership.d Thed reasond thatd Id don'td fullyd agreed withd thed
assessmentd isd thatd whend itd comesd tod sociald encountersd Id struggled ind thosed areasd becaused Id
haved sociald anxiety.d Ifd itd isd ad larged groupd Id willd pulld myselfd backd andd stayd offd tod thed sided lined
especiallyd smallerd groupsd Id haved ad smallerd standoffd personality.d Evend withd havingd sociald
anxietyd Id findd myselfd capabled ofd stilld reactingd andd solvingd highd stressedd issuesd andd
obligations.d Portabled andd nond portabled skillsd Id thinkd ared importantd becaused whend showingd ord
teachingd andd leadingd somebodyd ond howd tod dod somethingd itd isd easierd tod knowd whatd you'red
doingd andd understand.d Andd Id alsod thinkd thatd whend itd comesd tod leadingd somebodyd ford
whicheverd reasond ord whyd youd leadd someoned itd bringsd youd tod ad leveld whered theyd cand related tod
youd andd youd cand related tod themd whichd thend justd buildsd ond manyd otherd aspects.d Asd Id reviewd
myd assessment,d thed resultsd stated thed leveld ofd self-awareness,d self-management,d empathyd andd
sociald skillsd ared ind lined tod possessd thed emotionald intelligenced ofd ad successfuld leader.d Thesed
characteristicsd ared indicatived ofd whatd leadersd used tod monitord theird feelingsd andd thosed ofd
others.Thed twod OCEANd personalityd traitsd Id feeld couldd bed mostd effectived asd and inclusived
leaderd ared opennessd andd conscientiousness.d Ad leaderd whod isd willingd tod bed opend tod shared andd
listend tod other’sd experiencesd isd ad greatd startd tod becomingd mored inclusived ind thed workplace.d
Havingd ad leveld ofd conscientiousnessd showsd ad desired tod dod tasksd welld andd taked obligationsd ofd
othersd seriously.d Whend Id thinkd ofd ineffectived leaders,d Id seed individualsd whod lackd empathyd
andd sociald skills.d Ifd youd cannotd care,d understandd andd communicated tod leadd teamsd tod success,d
youd ared failingd asd ad leader.d Ad greatd leaderd willd findd waysd tod communicated withd othersd ind and
inclusived way.d Tod possessd portabled skillsd ared vitald ford individualsd tod communicate,d
collaborated andd adaptd tod inclusived workplaced environmentsd whend changingd jobs.d Thed
knowledged andd skillsd tod traind othersd cand assistd ind thed questd tod becomed ad mored inclusived
leader.d Afterd takingd thed self-assessment,d Id concludedd thatd Id haved enoughd emotionald
intelligenced tod bed ad successfuld leaderd becaused myd scoresd indicatedd thatd Id haved goodd self-
management,d sociald awareness,d andd relationshipd management.d Thed assessmentd alsod
indicatedd thatd Id couldd workd ond myd self-awarenessd ad little.d Overall,d myd scoresd gived ad goodd
representationd ofd howd Id reallyd am.d Id strived tod communicated andd buildd relationshipsd withd co-
workersd andd peersd alike.d Id believed thatd thed conscientiousnessd traitd willd helpd med bed ad mored
inclusived leaderd becaused developingd ad mored diligentd mindd willd allowd med tod bed mored self-
awared ofd myd actionsd andd emotions.d Overd thed pastd fewd yearsd ofd workd ind myd youngd adultd life,d
thed ineffectived leadersd ind myd jobsd alld sharedd ad commond traitd whichd wasd neuroticismd tod somed
degree.d Thesed ineffectived leadersd usuallyd tendd tod lackd communicationd skills,d ord thed abilityd tod
maintaind workd relationships.d Inclusived leadershipd skillsd ared portabled becaused youd cand used
thesed skillsd ind sociald settingsd outsided ofd workd ord yourd personald life.d Leadershipd skillsd allowd
ford betterd communicationd amongd peopled andd allowd youd tod achieved commond goalsd withind ad
group.d Fromd thed resultsd ofd thed self-assessment,d Id dod believed Id haved whatd itd takesd tod bed ad
successfuld leader.d Id scoredd highd ind thed majorityd ofd areas,d butd thed oned thatd wasd lowerd thand thed
othersd (thed oned Id expected)d wasd ind regardd tod empathy.d Id knowd ford myselfd itd hasd somethingd Id
beend longd workingd ond andd continued tod stilld developd ind myd personald andd professionald lives.d
Beingd capabled ofd masteringd empathyd wouldd allowd med thed abilityd tod trulyd bed and all-inclusived
leader,d fullyd capabled ofd interpretingd andd sustainingd othersd needsd andd wants.d Hopefullyd
befored theyd evend arised asd ad publicd thing.Touchingd ond thed nextd part,d leadsd med tod thed OCEANd
traitd ofd Agreeableness.d Thatd isd thed traitd Id believed wouldd bestd helpd med asd empathyd andd
compassiond ared thosed Id knowd Id dod haved largerd areasd ofd improvementd still.Asd fard asd leaders,d
thed oned thatd reallyd comesd tod mindd whend thinkingd ofd ineffectived leadershipd (ifd evend seeingd
shortd termd successd ind numberd drivend management)d wouldd bed microd managing.d Alld thesed
'leaders'd alwaysd displayedd and intensed needd tod bed frontd andd centerd whiled overseeingd andd
monitoringd everythingd done.d Controld wasd ad priorityd ford them,d andd usuallyd resultedd ind thed
lossd ofd controld whend peopled wouldd becomed fedd up,d stopd working,d beingd efficientd ord justd
leave.d Inclusived leadershipd isd incrediblyd portable,d notd justd ind ourd professionald livesd butd
personald livesd asd well.d Thesed skillsd rund handd ind handd withd ourd sociald stratosphered andd allowd
suchd peopled tod quicklyd formd bondsd withd thosed aroundd them.d Tod bed seend asd reliable,d
respectedd andd oned withd theird community.d Thisd week'sd self-assessmentd kindd ofd threwd med ford
ad loop.d Itd saysd Id rankd highd ind sociald skills,d whichd ind ad smalld groupd settingd Id cand agreed with,d
howeverd ind ad largerd groupd ofd people,d Id haved sociald anxietyd andd withdrawd intod myself.d Id alsod
rankedd highd ind self-managementd andd awareness,d whichd Id completelyd agreed with.d Id tendd tod bed
mored vigilantd whend assessingd myselfd andd myd emotionsd becaused Id knowd myselfd betterd thand
anyoned elsed doesd andd ifd Id cannotd controld ord maintaind myd emotionsd thend Id amd unabled tod
functiond atd anyd level.d So,d Id supposed ifd Id amd abled tod overcomed myd sociald anxietyd ind largerd
groupsd ofd peopled thend Id believed thatd Id dod haved tod emotionald intelligenced tod bed ad goodd leader.d
Asd ford thed OCEANd personalityd traits,d Id believed thatd conscientiousnessd andd Neuroticismd ared
myd strongerd suits.d Id believed thatd evend withd myd sociald anxietyd Id stilld functiond atd fulld capacityd
andd amd abled tod handled stressfuld situationsd withd ad certaind calmd thatd comesd withd myd strongd
abilityd tod compartmentalized andd accomplishd whateverd taskd laysd ind frontd ofd me.I'md notd sured
whichd attributed thisd ineffectived leaderd wouldd falld under,d butd Id wasd workingd atd ad locallyd
ownedd Italiand restaurantd andd thed owner,d andd hisd wifed wouldd fightd withd eachd otherd constantlyd
whiled takingd outd theird frustrationsd fromd theird maritald spatsd ond theird employees.d Id stayedd
longerd thand anyoned elsed hasd everd managedd tod tolerated them,d butd itd wasd rough.Portabled andd
nonportabled skillsd ared essentiald ford ad leaderd tod possessd becaused ifd youd haved oned withoutd thed
other,d thend youd knowd howd tod dod something,d butd lackd thed technicald abilityd tod dod sod ord viced
versa.d Eitherd wayd youd flipd thatd coind itd makesd leadershipd difficultd becaused tellingd someoned
howd tod dod somethingd withoutd beingd abled tod showd themd sortd ofd nullifiesd leadership.d Thed self-
assessmentd ond EQd confirmedd Id haved highd emotionald intelligence.d Itd startedd asd ad child.d Id wasd
ond thed conflictd resolutiond teamd andd tod thisd day,d Id tryd tod understandd whyd peopled dod whatd theyd
dod befored passingd judgment.d Id amd ad veryd empatheticd individual.d Ifd you’red hurting,d it’sd asd ifd Id
cand feeld yourd paind andd willd tryd tod helpd asd muchd asd Id possiblyd can.d Butd basedd ond thed
assessment,d Id wouldd bed ad successfuld leaderd because,d Id amd awared ofd myd feelings,d abled tod
understandd others,d andd communicated thosed feelings,d effectively.I’md sured alld componentsd
wouldd helpd ind beingd and inclusived leader.d Unfortunately,d I’md notd strongd ind alld areas.d So,d ofd
thed Bigd Fived OCEANd personalityd traits,d Id believed Agreeableness,d andd Opennessd tod
Experienced wouldd helpd med tod bed and inclusived leader.d Also,d EQd components,d liked sociald
skillsd thatd included relationshipd managementd andd thed abilityd tod communicate,d wouldd bed and
advantaged ford beingd and inclusived leader.Afterd muchd thought,d Id didd recalld oned ineffectived
leader.d However,d shed wasd thrownd intod thed roled withoutd anyd training.d So,d itd wasd and
organizationald error.d Shed hadd goodd personalityd traitsd liked Extraversiond andd Agreeableness.d
Butd Id believed herd downfalld wasd thatd ofd herd beingd ond thed higherd endd ford Neuroticism.d Shed didd
notd knowd howd tod deald withd thed stress.d Sometimes,d shed tookd itd outd ond herd subordinatesd byd
yellingd ord evend walkingd out.d Itd wasd liked watchingd ad badd relationship.d Oned momentd shed wasd
bestd friendsd withd thed personnel.d Thend befored youd knewd it,d shed wouldd god ond ad rampage.d
Whiled youd mayd haved tod learnd ad job-specificd skill,d emotionald intelligenced componentsd andd
OCEANd personalityd traitsd ared portabled skills.d EQd willd allowd youd tod buildd andd managed
relationshipsd individuallyd andd asd ad team.d Liked EQ,d Agreeablenessd willd helpd youd workd welld
withd others.d Then,d Conscientiousnessd willd proved credibilityd andd reliability.d Opennessd tod
Experienced willd welcomed creativity.d Finally,d beingd abled tod handled stressd andd criticismd byd
beingd ond thed lowerd endd ofd Neuroticismd willd helpd ind beingd and inclusived leaderd becaused havingd
thickd skind willd helpd ind speakingd outd againstd wrongdoings.d So,d evend ifd youd mustd learnd ad newd
skill,d havingd thesed portabled skillsd willd calld ford betterd interactionsd acrossd diversed groupsd .
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