Movie Review: The Days of Wine and Roses
Movie Review: The Days of Wine and Roses
Liberty University
PACO 615: Marriage and Family Counseling
Dr. Elias Moitinho
February 18, 2025
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The Days of Wine and Roses: The Review
For the non-Christian couple movie, I chose “The Days of Wine and Roses.” Released in
1962, this movie follows Joe Clay and Kristen Arnesen. The film opens with Joe on a boat
bringing a group of women to a client on their yacht. Working in public relations, he is timely, so
when Kristen rolls up to the dock late, he scolds her and critiques her for not being more
scantily dressed. It turns out she is the secretary to his boss. He tries to make things right by
apologizing, and they get dinner together. The conversation moves to alcohol; Joe asks why she
does not drink, and Kristen explains she is a teetotaler and just does not like the taste. But she
does love chocolate. Joe then gets the waiter to make her a Brandy Alexander, which she admits
tastes nice and makes her feel good. They bond over booze and end up getting married.
The theme of this movie is alcoholism, and the mark of time is their daughter, Debbie. As
their daughter gets older, their alcoholism deepens. As Debbie is an infant, Joe comes home
upset that Kristen is breastfeeding and cannot drink with him. His outburst is loud enough to
awaken Debbie. Shame causes him to weep, begging for forgiveness. The scene ends with
Kristen pouring some scotch into a glass, walking over to her husband, placing her hand gently
on his shoulder, and then taking a sip.
Life events brought their alcoholism even deeper, and Joe sought help. Kristen, however,
will not admit she is an alcoholic. But as Joe was put in the sanitarium several times for drinking
and tries to be sober, his wife still will not admit that she has a problem. Joe eventually finds
sobriety with the help of an Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) sponsor, Jim. His year of sobriety comes
with the bonus of being a good father, having a steady job, and a lovely apartment. But it comes
at the cost of losing his wife, who will not get help because she cannot stop. The movie ends
with Joe watching Kristen walk down the street into a bar.
The Days of Wine and Roses: Therapeutic Implications
The scene that has the most therapeutic implications comes at the end as Joe is a year
sober, has a good job, is a good father, and now has a good life without alcohol. He does not
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miss the booze and is experiencing a fuller life without it. Debbie is roughly seven years old, Joe
has been a single father for at least a year, and Kristen has been drinking with other men in
bars. In the final scene, Kristen comes to Joe’s door and asks to get back together, but he is
unwilling to sacrifice sobriety for her. They can get back together, but she has to put the bottle
down. Joe is willing to help, but Kristen confesses she cannot stop and is unwilling to try. Joe
puts his foot down and says he cannot be with her unless she lets go of the bottle. That is when
she walks out.
Joe and Kristen would be classified as the “Accept the things I cannot change” couple. In,
Couple Therapy the authors state, “For many couples there are biological, characterological or
situational problems that are highly unlikely to change. It may be due to chronic health or
mental health problems, severe history of abuse, or a persistent attachment style that is difficult
for the couple. This couple could be low in love, faith, work, or all three.” (Ripley & Worthington,
2014, p.180). Kristen’s attempt to connect once more to her husband was doomed to fall short
because of her characterological issue of alcoholism. On the other hand, Joe felt the emotional
connection and even desired to reconcile if she put the bottle down. But because she was
unwilling, he held his ground and would not sacrifice his sobriety for her.
I chose this scene because Joe is an inspiration for the emotional connection he still has
for his wife despite her issues. He still loves her dearly and wants to be with her, which is
evident in his appeal to help her and as he call her name when she left. But there are some
things that he cannot change in her. She is an addict and is unlikely to change because of her
dependency on alcohol. Again, this is evident in her own words while talking to Joe for the last
time, “The world looks so dirty to me when I am not drinking. I don’t think I can ever stop, not
like you. I couldn’t.”. “You could!” Joe exclaims. “I could if I really wanted to, but I don’t. I know
that now.”
I would use this scene as a means to provide hope. While there is not much hope in their
dialog, the setting offers hope. Joe is okay, strong, has a steady job, is healthy, and hopeful that
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his wife will return. This emotional scene gives hope to the sober one in the marriage that
perhaps, one day, their spouse will return. Perhaps they will want to get help and do anything
for the marriage. The appeal of a sober, good, healthy, and full life with their child might be
enough to bring them back one day. But addiction is a terrible monster that consumes the
individual and leaves them as a lifeless husk. The only cure is Christ.
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The Days of Wine and Roses: Personal/Professional Implications This movie hit
hard on a personal level because my father was an alcoholic. He died when I was ten because
he was unwilling to get help for his many addictions. The scenes listed above hit hard because
I was that child who grew up watching the addictions take hold of my father more and more.
My mother, bless her heart, tried everything to help my father, but it was useless. The bottle,
cigarettes, and food were the sea that swallowed him whole.
The movie confirmed my suspicion that any marriage grounded by anything other than
the Word of God will find something else to be grounded in (Moitinho & Moitinho, 2020,
p.193). In Joe and Kristen’s case, it was alcohol. The sad reality is that this is a couple that has no
faith in God and built their whole marriage on the three-way between them and alcohol. As Joe
explains, “You and I were on a sea of booze, and the boat sank.” But there are many things
couples cling to as the anchor of their marriage boat. Money, sex, or status are all things that
can become idols that the couple worships, and those idols will let them down again and again.
This whole movie was the full story of how addiction can destroy a marriage. The whole
narrative can help anyone see how destructive addiction is, how the denial of addiction can
deteriorate the relationship and the individual, and how addiction can be overcome through
proper help. It is difficult but not impossible. While I do not struggle with alcoholism, I have
struggled with pornography in the past. Joe’s story has given me hope that I can overcome my
addiction, and on a professional level, it can provide clients with that hope as well.
There were not any scenes that I disagreed with. However, it was a sorrowful movie to
watch. Even though AA is not a Christian organization, they do provide so much help to people
with alcoholism. Their push for people to put hope in a higher power cannot be undermined
either. I hope those people will choose Jesus Christ as the source of that hope.
References:
Moitinho & Moitinho (2020). The Dream Home: How to Create an Intimate Christian Marriage.
Kendall Hunt Publishing – Custom Wholesale.
https://mbsdirect.vitalsource.com/books/9798385150977
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Ripley, J. S., & Worthington, E. L., Jr (2014). Couple Therapy: A New Hope-Focused Approach. IVP
Academic.
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