Assurance Blogpost: 1 John 5:13
Christine Y. Baker
NBST 845: General Epistles/Revelation
November 23, 2025
FROM THE COUNSELING CHAIR: THE VERSE I TURN TO
WHEN PARENTS FEEL TORN BETWEEN FAITH AND THEIR
CHILD’S IDENTITY
INTRODUCTION
What do you do when someone you love says something that shakes your faith more than
you expected?
I remember a particular moment when a parent sat down across from me after their child shared
something deeply personal about their identity. They didn’t cry or panic; instead, they simply
looked down at the floor, frozen in place—as if their whole world had shifted just a little,
catching them off guard.
When they finally looked up, their voice gently wavered as they asked the questions, almost
hesitant to say them aloud, taking a brief pause after each one.
“What do I do with this?”
“Will I dishonor God if I respond the wrong way?”
“How do I love my child and stay faithful to Scripture?”
“Why do I suddenly feel unsure about my own walk with God?”
Those questions stuck with me.
As a Christian Mental Health Counselor, I’ve discovered that moments like these do more than
just raise questions about parenting—they also prompt questions about faith. These aren’t just
abstract theological questions; they’re the kinds that can keep us awake at night. They make us
wonder if we’re disappointing God, misinterpreting Scripture, or feeling uncertain about our
spiritual foundation.
If this resonates with you and you feel the same way, then you’re in the right place with this blog.
I’m glad you're here!
THE TORN MOMENT
We never imagined reaching a point where our child’s LGBTQ identity would challenge what
we’ve learned from Scripture, making us wonder how acceptance and faith can truly coexist.
Our torn moment doesn’t change God’s grip on us.
John wrote this verse to make sure we know that — not feel it, but know it.
1 John 5:13:
"These things I have written to you who believe in the name of the Son of God, so that you
may know that you have eternal life.”
John wasn’t writing to people who felt strong. He was writing to
people who felt shaken — believers who suddenly weren’t sure if
they were getting faith “right,” believers who feared they might be
letting God down, believers who wondered whether confusion meant
distance from God.
We are not the first believers to feel torn.
Long before modern conversations about identity, John wrote to people who were shaken on the
inside. The believers he cared for were confused, uncertain, and questioning where they stood
with God—not because they stopped loving Him, but because something happened that unsettled
their confidence.
Their torn moment didn’t come from parenting,
but it did come from pressure —
pressure from others who claimed to be more spiritual,
pressure from voices that made them doubt themselves,
pressure that made them ask, “Do I still belong?”
And into that pressure — into their fear, their self-doubt, their spiritual disorientation —
John gives them something solid:
ASSURANCE
John’s assurance in 1 John 5:13 is meant to steady believers who feel uncertain — not because
their faith has failed, but because life has confronted them with something they never expected.
When he writes, “that you may know,” he is reminding them — and us — that confidence before
God is not built on perfect understanding but on the unchanging work of Christ.
This assurance matters because moments like these can make you question where you stand with
God. You may love Him deeply and still feel unsure when acceptance and Scripture feel difficult
to hold together. But John makes it clear: your salvation is not fragile. Eternal life is not a
shifting verdict that rises and falls with your hardest conversations.
Scripture reinforces this steady confidence and speaks directly into moments when our hearts
feel unsteady:
“There is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.” (Rom 8:1) You
may feel the weight of conflict or confusion, but God is not condemning you. We stand before
Him fully covered by Christ, even when we don’t have everything figured out.
“Nothing… will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus.” (Rom 8:38–39)
Not your questions. Not your fear. Not the process of learning how to love your child well.
God’s love isn’t pulled away from you — we remain held, even when we feel stretched.
“No one will snatch them out of my hand.” (Jn 10:28)
You may feel like your footing is slipping, but Jesus says your place with Him isn’t up for grabs.
Our emotions may shift — His grip does not.
Assurance also shapes how we love. John ties these themes together on purpose because security
with God allows us to show love without fear:
“Perfect love casts out fear.” (1 Jn 4:18)
When you know you are secure in God’s love, fear loses the authority to dictate how you
respond. You’re free to love your child — not out of panic, but out of the confidence God has in
you
“We love because He first loved us.” (1 John 4:19)
We don’t love from our own strength. We love from the love we’ve already received — the love
God poured into us long before we faced these difficult moments.
Because you are secure in Christ, you can walk through this sensitive journey with your child
without believing that every step puts your relationship with God at risk. Assurance doesn’t
remove the weight of the moment, but it keeps you anchored so you can respond with clarity,
compassion, and confidence in the God who holds you.
This is why John ends this portion of his letter with such a direct, grounding statement in 1 John
5:13. He is not inviting believers to search for assurance — he is declaring that assurance already
belongs to those who believe. When John says, “that you may know,” he is making confidence a
present reality, not a future achievement.
And that promise still stands for us today.
You may feel torn, unsure, or even afraid in this moment, but the truth John gives remains
unchanged: your eternal life is secure because of Christ, not because of how well you navigate
the tension you’re facing.
In seasons where acceptance and Scripture feel hard to hold together, 1 John 5:13 anchors us in
what is certain:
God’s grip is steady, His love is constant, and your salvation is not shaken by
your questions.
John wrote these words so that you can rest in what God has already settled —
that you belong to Him, you are held by Him, and you can move
forward from a place of assurance, not fear.
LIVING FROM WHAT JOHN WANTED US TO KNOW
This is the place where what feels torn in you meets what is steady in God — where the
assurance of 1 John 5:13 speaks directly into your uncertainty.
This is where your title takes shape — where the verse John wrote meets the very place your
faith feels unsteady. The struggles you’re facing are not abstract, theoretical, or detached from
real life. They are deeply personal. And John’s words in 1 John 5:13 speak directly into that
personal space with clarity, stability, and grounding assurance.
Your story and John’s message connect in a remarkable way:
Assurance becomes the anchor for a faith that feels pulled in multiple directions.
When everything around you starts to feel blurred — acceptance, Scripture, identity, family
expectations, church culture — God does not leave you to sort it out alone. Instead, He points
you back to a truth that doesn’t shift, even when everything else does.
John didn’t write this verse to settle every possible tension a believer would ever face. He wrote
it to settle you. To put a foundation under your feet. To remind you that your security with God is
not threatened by the questions you carry, the conversations you’re navigating, or the
uncertainties you’re walking through. His message still fits today:
you are not trying to earn stability with God — you’re living from the stability He already
provided.
And this is where acceptance and assurance meet. You may still be processing how to approach
your child’s LGBTQ identity with wisdom and faithfulness, but your starting point is not fear.
Your starting point is being securely held in Christ. When that becomes clear, the pressure shifts.
You are no longer trying to love from a place of anxiety — you are loving from a place of
grounding.
The assurance John describes allows you to breathe again. It frees you to approach conversations
with your child without believing that each decision places you on spiritual thin ice. It allows
you to sit with questions, uncertainties, and emotions without assuming that God is standing at a
distance watching to see if you will fail. Assurance means you are no longer trying to balance
faith and love on your own strength.
And here’s something just as important:
The same Christ who holds you securely is the Christ who loves your child deeply. His
care for them is no less than His care for you. Whatever their journey looks like — whether they
are walking with Him, questioning Him, or unsure what they believe — they are not beyond His
reach or His desire to draw them close. That truth matters because it shapes how we engage with
compassion, patience, and hope.
1 John 5:13 doesn’t minimize the complexity of what you’re walking through. It doesn’t erase
the tension. What it does is reorient you within it. Assurance gives you a fixed point — a truth so
steady that you can take your next step without fear of falling. It gives you the grounding to walk
forward with honesty, love, humility, and confidence in God’s faithfulness.
This is what John wanted his people to know.
This is what God wants you to know today.
Your footing hasn’t changed — even if your feelings have.
Your belonging hasn’t changed — even if your questions have.
Your God hasn’t changed — even if your situation has.
Assurance holds you steady so you can walk forward with love.
NEXT UPCOMING BLOG: “Can I Marry Again? A Christian’s Honest Question” (1
Corinthians 7:15).
