LIBERTY UNIVERSITY SCHOOL OF DIVINITY
What does the Bible say about resentment?
Submitted to Dr. James Sulfridge
in partial fulfillment of the requirements for the completion of
DSMN 500
Discipleship Ministries
By
Anthony Bean
Ressentir is an old French word, literally meaning "intense feeling." In English, it is resent,
and it refers to feeling bitterness and indignation due to injustice or insult. People may feel
resentful when they are cheated on, stolen from, or lied to. Resentment is often a reaction to
being insulted or having one’s errors or weaknesses exposed. Resentment can be directed at an
action, a statement, or a person—often, an authority figure, such as a parent, a teacher, or God.
Resentment is the cheapest and least legitimate form of anger. It is all emotion and no
strength.
Resentment can be sparked by perceived unfair treatment by another person. It could be
an injustice, like not getting a deserved promotion, or it could be an insult. Either way,
resentment stems from a love of the things of the world and a lack of faith in God and His plan.
It is legitimate to recognize unfair treatment, and even to do something about it. But it is not
helpful to wallow in feelings of self-righteous anger. The Bible is not concerned with the honor
of human pride. An intense emotional response to an otherwise harmless insult may show a
lack of spiritual maturity and a love of self (Matthew 5:38-39). As David fled Jerusalem, he faced
the curses and insults of Shimei (2 Samuel 16:5-8). Rather than respond with resentment
towards Shimei—and instead of killing him, as was the king’s right (verse 9)—David chose the
path of humility. His words are amazing: “If he is cursing because the LORD said to him, ‘Curse
David,’ who can ask, ‘Why do you do this?’” (verse 10). David avoided feelings of resentment by
viewing the situation as from the Lord.
Other times, people feel resentment when God allows or orchestrates an injustice in the
course of ministry. If we’re serving God, we should be treated fairly—or so the logic goes. But
then we have the example of Elijah, who faced many hardships although he was a faithful
servant of the Lord (1 Kings 19:10). Not to mention Job. Jesus warned us of injustice in this
fallen world: "If the world hates you, you know that it has hated Me before it hated you" (John
15:18). Knowing injustice is a fact of life should circumvent resentment in our hearts, as should
keeping our eyes on the goal. Being treated unfairly is painful, but our heavenly rewards will
more than compensate (Matthew 5:11-12; 6:19-21).
Another situation that can foster resentment is when we are dishonored because of
personal sin. Being accused of a failing we’re innocent of is injustice. Being accused of sin we
are guilty of can bring overwhelming shame and a goodly amount of denial. Sometimes the only
way God can draw our attention to our sin is to expose our faults in public. As the saying goes,
“He loves us too much to leave us where we are.” We may dislike what God is speaking into our
lives, but resentment isn’t going to help. Instead, when our sins have found us out (Numbers
32:23), it’s vital to admit we’re wrong. Human pride is nothing compared to the true honor we
receive when He sanctifies us (1 Thessalonians 5:23).
Resentment is a passive, weak emotion that has no place in the Christian life. If there is
injustice, we should deal with it through prayer and godly action. If there is insult, we should
concentrate on who we are in Christ and not place too much value on the cruel words of
others. If we face injustice in the course of our work for God, we should accept it as to be
expected. And if God allows us to be dishonored for the sake of sanctification, the best, least
painful response is to repent and allow Him to work in us.
A Resentful Heart
Resentment and bitterness are closely related to one another. When a person harbors
resentment in their heart, they have bitter feelings toward that particular person, circumstance,
or situation. A person can experience resentment and bitterness for a myriad of reasons.
Resentment can grow in the heart of a person after another individual morally offends them,
hurts them, or continually sins against them. As an example, a woman may resent her husband
if she knows he is cheating on her with another woman. Or a young teen may resent her
parents because they will not let her go to a party. Resentment is not something that has newly
erupted on the scene. Feelings of bitterness and resentment stretch all the way back to Cain
and Abel (Genesis 4:1-26). Cain held anger, bitterness, and resentment in his heart because
God had accepted Abel’s sacrifice, but He rejected Cain’s sacrifice (Genesis 4:1-7).
Out of the resentment in Cain’s heart, he murdered his brother (Genesis 4:8). God cursed
Cain and told him, “Now you are under a curse and driven from the ground, which opened its
mouth to receive your brother’s blood from your hand. When you work the ground, it will no
longer yield its crops for you. You will be a restless wanderer on the earth” (Genesis 4:11-12).
As one can see, resentment is not good to carry around with you throughout your life. Also, in
the Book of Genesis, sisters Leah and Rachel held resentment and bitterness towards each
other, which resulted in “a baby-war that didn't end until Jacob had conceived 13 children by
four different women.” Leah resented Rachel because Jacob loved Rachel more than he ever
loved Leah. These two women’s resentment toward one another caused animosity within their
family and hatred to arise in the hearts of each other (Genesis 29:31-30:24).
Rather than being resentful of one another, Leah and Rachel should have
offered forgiveness to one another. Job’s wife is another example of a person harboring
resentment in their soul (Ibid.). Job and his wife had witnessed the total loss of everything they
had — their home, their honor, and even their adult children.
Job never blames God, and he never holds any negative feelings towards the Lord. Rather
than holding resentment to the Lord, Job praises God (Job 1:20-22). Job’s wife does not follow
suit. Instead of turning to the Lord, Job’s wife allowed anger, hostility, and resentment to grow
and fester in her heart. Her ultimate proof of resentment toward God is found in these words
that she tells Job, “Are you still maintaining your integrity? Curse God and die!” (Job 2:9). Job’s
wife let resentment control her to the point of cursing God in her heart. Many of us have been
in experiences where everything in our life seems as if it is falling apart. When we look around,
it seems like everyone else’s lives are going perfectly fine. This can cause anger, bitterness,
jealousy, and resentment to grow in our hearts. Rather than letting these feelings fester in us
like Job’s wife did, we should intentionally choose to be happy for those around us and ask God
to help us remove any anger, jealousy, bitterness, or resentment from our hearts.
Choosing the Opposite
The Lord delights to help and through the working of the Holy Spirit in our inner being, He
can help remove these negative feelings from the recesses of our hearts. If we leave
resentment to worsen in our hearts, it can lead to many negative actions, such as what
happened between Cain and Abel.
Resentment needs to be rooted out of our hearts so that we do not sin against the Lord
and others. If we choose to resist bitterness and resentment, we will be happier and more
productive for the Lord. Resentment did not cease in the Old Testament. Findings of
resentment are found in the gospel accounts. Since Jesus did not come in riding on a stallion to
defeat the Romans, the people resented Him and wanted Him to be killed (Matthew 27:15-23).
The Pharisees and other Jewish leaders held resentment against Jesus Christ because of His
proclamation of being the Son of God.
The Pharisees did not want to submit to Jesus’ Lordship, and they rejected Him. As shown
in the Old Testament, resentment at its worse can lead to murder. Cain held resentment to
Abel, which resulted in Cain murdering Abel. The Pharisees, other Jewish rulers, and the people
as a whole held resentment to Jesus and this led to murder.
Resentment has no place in a Christian’s heart. What the Bible does tell us is to let go of
any resentful feelings towards others. Ephesians 4:31 says, “Get rid of all bitterness, rage and
anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice.” Jesus does not want us to hold
bitter feelings toward others in our lives. He tells us to choose to forgive them, “And when you
stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive them, so that your Father in heaven
may forgive you your sins” (Mark 11:25). It is worthwhile to mention that forgiving a person
does not mean you forget what they did, nor does it mean that what they did to you is “okay.”
What Does This Mean?
Forgiving means you are intentionally choosing to get the situation over to God and that
you are forgiving them as the Lord forgave you. We do not deserve God’s forgiveness, yet He
still extends it to us by placing faith in Jesus. In the same way, many people in our lives may not
deserve forgiveness, but we still have to forgive them.
Even if they do not ask for our forgiveness, we still need to forgive them as the Lord
forgave us (Ephesians 4:32). When we choose to intentionally forgive a person, bitterness,
anger, and resentment will begin to loosen their grip on our hearts. The Lord can help you let
go of these feelings and replace them with love, care, and compassion. The Bible promises us
that if we submit ourselves to God, the devil will flee from us (James 4:7). Satan wants us to
grow angry, bitter, and resentful toward others, so he will fuel our hatred and hostility. If we
choose to submit our feelings to God and ask Him for His help, God will help us and strengthen
us (1 Peter 5:10).
The world pushes for the idea that resentment is normal and “fine” to have, but it is not.
Think about all the songs, films, and other works of the world that glorify resentment. The Bible
tells us resentment is not good and will only end in sin. Choose today to remove resentment
and bitterness from your heart. If we are honest with ourselves, holding resentment toward
others only makes us feel worse.
You do not need to spend any more of your days in resentment of others. Jesus died in
order for you to have abundant life, not only for eternity but also for every day of your life
(John 10:10). The Lord loves you and He is ready to help you pluck resentment out of your
heart. Resentment can cause scars on our hearts, but God is ready to help bind up your wounds
(Psalm 147:3).
