Chloe,
In review of "Forgiveness and Reconciling Through Experiencing Empathy
(FREE)" by Ripley & Worthington (2014) and choosing the most powerful step to
integrate into the counseling room w/a couple who is trying to mend, heal and restore
their relationship, the 5th step of intervention-which places emphasis on reducing the
injustice gap by making amends just as you articulated so well in your thread in listing
the 7 methods of FREE intervention is the therapeutic methodology I would implement
in leading and preparing a couple in journey of forgiveness and reconciliation. Upon
leading a hurting couple through the healing process the initial integration of humility of
self seems appropriate to use as the initial step as a hurting couple walks into reducing
the injustice gap in making amends (Ripley & Worthington, 2014).
The REACH forgiveness step addresses the main offense, and works with the
offended to empathize, give forgiveness, and commit to that forgiveness; which would
go hand-in-hand with reducing the injustice gap by making amends.
As Christian Counselors in training, we can look to the King James Bible in 1
Corinthians 13:4-13, " 4Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity
vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up; 5doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her
own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil; 6rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the
truth; 7beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things;
8charity never faileth: but whether there be prophecies, they shall fail; whether there be
tongues, they shall cease; whether there be knowledge, it shall vanish away; 9for we
know in part, and we prophesy in part; 10but when that which is perfect is come, then
that which is in part shall be done away; 11when I was a child, I spake as a child, I
understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away
childish things; 12for now we see through a glass, darkly; but then face to face: now I
know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known; 13and now abideth faith,
hope, charity, these three; but the greatest of these is charity (KJV, 2014). We can see
in the Word of God that the Bible defines and articulates what love looks and feels like
in a healthy relationship.
Helping couples heal and recover in the intentional act of forgiveness is going to
require unconditional love to flow between a couple-similar to that of a symbiotic
relationship, in order for genuine forgiveness to take root and become the new
cornerstone for them. Referring to scripture at times where emotions run high, and
applying the balm of Gilead to deep wounds is going to place an expectancy-not only on
the couple but also on the shoulders of the professional counselor. Thanks for sharing
your thoughts on this week's threaded discussion.
References:
Holy Bible (2014). kjv. Nashville, TN. Holeman Bible Publishers.
Ripley, J. S., & Worthington, E. L. (2014). Couple therapy: A New Hope-Focused
Approach.
Downers Grove, IL: InterVarsity Pr.
