CHMN 301
Foundation of NextGen Ministry
LIBERTY UNIVERSITY
JOHN W. RAWLINGS SCHOOL OF DIVINITY
Reading Report: It’s Just a Phase So Don’t Miss It
Submitted to Dr. Steve Vandergriff
in partial fulfillment of the requirements for the completion of
2
Introduction
Every child goes through specific and unique phases in life. Unfortunately, the world
responds with the saying, "It's just a phase" when a child is doing something undesirable that a
parent hopes they will eventually stop doing. This should not be the case since children go
through very distinctive phases before becoming adults and leaving the house forever. If parents
and churches learn how to relate to their children and adolescents during each phase, they will
eventually see the impact and healthy growth because of their efforts. Every stage of life truly
matters, and parents and churches can learn how to positively impact a child at every phase from
birth to young adulthood while helping them develop authentic faith.
Summary
Reggie Joiner and Kristen Ivy of Orange wrote It's Just A Phase So Don't Miss It as a
handbook about the phases of life. Parents must not miss out on the distinctive features of each
one. They also included thirteen things churches can do to equip the children in their ministries
from birth to age 18 when they are ready to transition into adulthood.
After providing an overview of each phase, they explain that church staff and volunteers
must all be on the same page so churches can connect kids to one big plan. They teach "the phase
that should matter most is the one you are working with now."1 The four words they use to
connect parents, volunteers, and staff members to each phase are embrace, engage, affirm, and
mobilize.2 These words are frequently used to help describe the thirteen ways to implement the
phases in the church. After establishing the plan, they emphasize the necessity of influencing the
people who have influence in the church. Children's and student ministry leaders and pastors live
1 Reggie Joiner and Kristen Ivy, It’s Just a Phase So Don’t Miss It: Why Every Life Stage of a Kid Matters
and at Least 13 Things Your Church Should Do About It (Cumming: Orange, 2015), 47.
2 Joiner and Ivy, It’s Just a Phase, 51.
3
by the statement, "You can't champion a better future for kids unless you consistently challenge
the priorities of adults."3 As a ministry leader who works with kids, it's incredibly vital to build a
team of people who are willing to invest in a child's future with discipleship and relationships.
This includes having difficult conversations with those who serve on the team, championing and
inspiring those who are willing to put forth the effort to be there for the kids, and making the kids
a priority.
Next, they continue to talk about the call to reactivate parents each year. This is possible
by assisting parents in staying relevant. They use a great comparison of Kodak and Blockbuster
not changing with the times to Disney World and Amazon constantly evolving and never being
finished with setting and achieving their goals for improvement. If parents don't reinvent
themselves through the phases, they will strain their relationship with their children and lose
their long-term relational influence.4 Once kids receive that consistent voice from their parents,
they will also need it from their leader at church. Parents are meant to be the primary authority in
a child's life, but research shows that influence from other adults, especially at church, produces
kids with better odds of winning.5 The authors continue to illustrate how leaders and parents can
work together to discover a child’s world and inspire through love. Every single phase has
moments to help kids "see their potential to know God, rediscover how to relate to God, and
experience the unconditional love of God."6 Parents and leaders must make this the purpose of
teaching and equipping children. All thirteen ways churches can equip children, students, and
leaders to maximize each phase are astonishingly important. Reggie and Kristen underline these
3
4
5
6
Ibid., 54.
Ibid., 62.
Ibid., 69.
Ibid., 135.
4
ways and practical steps to implement them into a church's next-generation ministries, all while
connecting it back to God and leading children to the kingdom of God, the most important thing.
Personal Response
I sincerely enjoyed this book and hope that anyone who works on the NextGen team in a
church will take the time to read it as well. The research that went into this book is prevalent
with how specific each phase is. I would often compare each stage to my journey through life,
and I found it to be deeply accurate to how I acted at that specific age. I appreciated the chapter
where they mentioned that not all kids are the same, and while each phase pertains to the
majority of those in that age group, there is still something to be learned about each child we
lead. Kristen and Ivy do a marvelous job of explaining the thirteen things churches can do about
the phases while elaborating on how to achieve each phase's goals effectively. When I started
seeing myself the way God sees me, my life was forever changed. The authors mentioned the
importance of treating every kid like they are created in the image of God. This is my biggest
goal as a children's ministry director. My favorite quote in the book is, "When you learn to see
God's image in kids, it increases the potential for kids to see God."7 This perspective can mold a
child into the person God intended for them to be. The main takeaway from this book that I pray
everyone grasps and takes to their church is that in every phase, we can help kids know God,
relate to God, and experience the love of God.
Conclusion
It's Just A Phase So Don't Miss It is a phenomenal resource for churches who are wanting
to expand their knowledge of what goes through a child's brain during their lives. When parents
and churches are able to embrace, engage, affirm, and mobilize each phase from a biblical
perspective, they can show kids God made them in His image, and they have the potential to love
7 Ibid., 141.
I read all 251 pages of this book.
Bibliography
Joiner, Reggie, and Kristen Ivy. 2015. It’s Just a Phase So Don’t Miss It: Why Every Life Stage of
a Kid Matters and at Least 13 Things Your Church Should Do About It. Cumming:
Orange.
5
Him and discover their purpose through Him. Every phase is significant and takes time.
Equipping parents and inspiring leaders will significantly impact the kids in the ministry. Reggie
and Kristen explain, "If every kid has been made in the image of God, and every kid matters to
God, then what you do every week in a kid’s life matters."8 When parents and churches engage in
a kid's life for each phase, kids can experience the love and the forgiveness of God and approach
adulthood as confident people who have authentic faith.
8 Ibid., 235.
6
