The Masquerade of What We Would Be

In the video “To This Day”, Shane Koyczan shares his growing experience. He grows up with others told him “what he would like to be?” He says, “They ask what we want to be but tell us what not to be.” He uses his own experience to reveal that we should stand up to define ourselves first and foremost. because if we don’t do, others will do for us. Geek, fatty, slut, fag, these are what others might define us. Do these marks stand for who we are or what we are going to do? Definitely not. Maybe we can pretend not to be hurt by these labels or nicknames, but they do hurt us. We grow with these pressures and assimilated by sub-culture around us. We live in pain and the result might be we want to end our life or revenge the society. Second, life is less to do with pain, more to do with beauty. We are supposed to appreciate ourselves and value who we are and what we have. If we can’t find our virtues, can’t find the meaning of existence, we need to change a mirror and look closer. We must believe those who label us are wrong. They must be wrong. Everybody has his weaknesses as well as strengths. If we focus on our weaknesses, we might be misled by others’ comments and miss the beauty of our strengths. So, appreciate ourselves more and never accept the identity others give.

Why are we easily affected by others’ comments and judges? The reasons, in my opinion, is not only the fact that we are all social creatures but the power of others’ definition. In sociology, there is a theory called mirror theory. The mirror is an analogy. It stands for what others think about us. When we observe what we look like in others’ eyes, we are more likely to think we are what others think and then we might perform in the way others expect we perform. Therefore we are easily misled if we do not have strong confidence. Then the question is “where is confidence from if we can't depend on others?” The confidence is from our inner part. We define ourselves by ourselves and prove to others we are full of beauty.

“Is this your bike” shows different reaction towards the white male, the colored mare, and pretty white female. The narrator reveals that prejudices exist between different races. Also, there is a stereotype on the black. People turn to think that black people are more likely to be theft if compared with the white. The addition of the pretty white lady tells that what most bystanders do might be wrong because they pay more attention to appearance and it affects their judges. When I watch the video, I can’t help to think about what makes these bystanders think so. I think it is blamed to the subculture in this community and the discrimination on the minors. I feel the power of the dominant group as well as their blindness. Their sense of superiority is so obvious and misleading that it might excuse their white peers and treat the colored horrible. For the minors, they must give themselves confidence and define themselves as Shane Koyczan asks in the last video. For the dominant group, they must stand up to support the weak, the truth, and equality. According to the bystander theory, the more people stand up for what is right, the more supporters they will get. However, if we choose to do nothing or follow what most people choose to do rather than what is right, we will be the victims in the future.

The speaker of "Fuck I Look Like" reveals the black discrimination and the stereotype like that the intelligence is a white train and the black does not read. She says she just represent herself and no matter what skin color she has, she will be herself. In our daily life, there are many stereotypes, not only on the colored or between different genders. There are stereotypes about who we are. The stereotypes, on the one hand, might come from that most people think so, on the other hand from the subculture around us. The most crucial part of stereotypes and discriminations is they might rape off our identity. Therefore we must define ourselves by ourselves and value more about beauty less about pain.