Project Wings for Kids Website Tour

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TA C K L I N G T H I S N AT I O N A L E P I D E M I C

BULLYING

Over my last 13 years with WINGS, I’ve watched bullying grow from a p

layground

issue to the national spotlight. I’ve s een kids deal with challenges durin

g the

school day but flourish after school in our program. I know what I’ve hea

the kids experience here in Charles ton is not unique, so I want to share

with you

some of what we teach to combat th is crisis.

The following includes tips and acti vities to help get the conversation g

oing with your

child about bullying and provides to ols to give kids the strength to face

it on their own.

For more information visit www.win gsforkids.org or email us at info@w

ingsforkids.org.

Thank you for your interest and sup port. Let’s keep working hard to ens

ure our kids

build the skills they need to succeed and be happy!

Flying high—Bridget Laird, WINGS CEO

What is bullying Three criteria distinguish bullying from other occurrences of misbehavior or isolated cases of aggression:

1. Bullying is aggressive behavior or an intention to harm;

2. It is carried out repeatedly and over time; and

3. It occurs within an interpersonal relationship characterized by an imbalance of power.

A student is bullied or victimized when he or she is the repeated target of deliberate negative actions by one or more students who possess greater verbal, physical, social, or psychological power.

WINGS works with students, parents and educators to correct this behavior by:

ng kids feel loved within their schools by providing role models, life lessons and a safe place to be after school;

relationship building skills, we empower kids to step into the shoes of others and avoid making decisions that can hurt them; and

kids develop ways to cope if they are in fact bullied.

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Some signs that may point to a bullying problem are:

aches, feeling sick or faking illness

suddenly skipping meals or binge eating. Kids may come home from school hungry because they did not eat lunch

nightmares

in schoolwork, or not wanting to go to school

of social situations

decreased self esteem

running away from home, harming themselves, or talking about suicide

Combat bullying by

Participate in our Combat

home or in your classroom. The following activities help teach kids some of the social and emotional skills that curve bullying.

Step Into their Shoes HOME or AT SCHOOL ACTIVITY Learning Objective: Kids will identify the emotions manifested in others through an awareness of facial expression, tone of voice, pitch, and gesture. Kids will learn to understand the emotional state of others. Game to practice: A Mile in my Shoes.

Brush the Pressure Off HOME or AT SCHOOL ACTIVITY Learning Objective: Kids will learn what peer pressure looks and feels like. Kids will learn how to say “no”. Game to practice:

You Can Trust Me AT SCHOOL ACTIVITY Learning Objective: Kids will identify the components of a

environment. Game to practice: Trust Telephone.

Recognize symptoms of bullying by or to your child.

Talk to your child about bullying and ask if they are being bullied.

Kids may be bullying others if they:

or to detention frequently

or new belongings

their actions

their reputation or popularity

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About WINGS

WINGS is an education program that teaches

decisions and build healthy relationships.

We do this by weaving a comprehensive social and emotional learning curriculum into a fresh and fun after school program.

Benefits of WINGS

Early studies from Yale University and the University of Virginia (UVA) provide evidence that students enrolled in two or more years of WINGS demonstrate

grades, and school attendance when compared to

anxiety, and greater satisfaction with school than

These early results led to a $2.8 million grant through the Institute of Education Sciences to UVA

of students will begin in August 2012.

Locations

WINGS @ Memminger Elementary School Charleston, SC

WINGS @ Chicora School of Communications North Charleston, SC

WINGS @ North Charleston Elementary School North Charleston, SC

WINGS @ James Simons Elementary School Charleston, SC

WINGS @ Heritage Elementary School Atlanta, GA (opening August 2012)

WINGS @ S.L. Lewis Elementary School Atlanta, GA (opening August 2012)

Does your child need to learn how to handle stress? Could they use help expressing emotions constructively?

The Ready, Set, Soar with SEL kit was specially designed for parents/guardians, educators, youth development leaders and others who want to incorporate social & emotional development activities, lessons and plans into kids’ daily lives.

All activities are based on proven activities from our “WINGS for kids” after school program. WINGS kids build their social and emotional skills daily. Now your kids can, too.

shape and reinforce social skills by visiting

Support WINGS

Help spread the word—tell anyone who cares about kids of our program.

Friend us on Facebook: wingsforkids

Keep up with WINGS news by registering for our eNewsletter The New Smart.

Welcome to the movement!

476 Meeting Street, Suite E Charleston, South Carolina 29403 www.wingsforkids.org

Step Into Their SHOES Social Awareness Learning Objective: Kids will identify the emotions manifested in others through an awareness of facial expression, tone of voice, pitch, and gesture. Kids will learn to understand the emotional state of others. Talking points for a discussion with children:  It is important to understand the emotions you have, but it is also important to understand the emotions in

others.  Ask: Why do you think that you should try to understand how others are feeling?  It’s important to understand how others are feeling for many reasons. A few reasons are because this is how

friendships form and allows you to have positive relationships with other people.  By understanding how others feel you are stepping into their shoes.  When I say step into their shoes, we don’t mean that you will actually put their shoes on and walk or run

around, we mean try to understand how the other person feels. Are they happy, sad, angry? Why do they feel this way?

 If you ignore how others feel, you are not being a kind and caring friend.

 Here’s a helpful way to gain a better understanding of what people are feeling.  S Sound of their voice (loud, quiet, fast, slow)  H How they are acting (what they are doing with their arms, legs, hands, etc.)  O Outer appearance (how they look on the outside: sweating, blushing, etc.)  E Expression on their face (mouth and eyes)  S Surroundings (where they are and who they are with)

 Pay attention to the whole person and watch for patterns in how they are acting. Just listening or paying

attention to one part of a person will not always tell you how someone is feeling. For instance a person with their arms crossed may just be cold and trying to keep warm– not rejecting or disliking what you are saying at all. You need to look at all the other factors in the word SHOES.

By being able to tell how someone is feeling can help you decide the best way to communicate and react to them.

 Once you understand SHOES, if you see a child who seems sad, lonely or scared, be sure to check in with them. If they are being bullied, you need to tell an adult AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.

Once you use SHOES to help you better understand how people feel, you should think about how you would want someone to treat you if you were feeling the same way.

 If a group of kids is picking on or bullying another child, before joining in, think about how it would feel to step into their SHOES. Bullying is hurtful and mean.

A MILE IN MY SHOES Social Awareness Circle Game This game is for a larger group but can be adapted for a one-on-one scenario Learning Objective: Kids will identify the emotions manifested in others through an awareness of facial expression, tone of voice, pitch, and gesture. Kids will learn to understand the emotional state of others.

 Think of several different emotions appropriate for his/her age group.  Have kids stand in a circle with an adult in the middle.  The adult points directly in front of him/her, closes his/her eyes, and spins around a few times.  When the adult decides to stop he/she will be pointing at a child.  The adult walks up to the child he/she is pointing to. That person (the one being pointed at), must shake

the adult’s hand and ask, “How are you?”

 The adult must act out an emotion. The adult can use words (but doesn’t have to), but cannot explain the emotion they are feeling. They can only use words to show the tone and pitch of their voice. For example if the emotion is worried, the adult can’t say, “I’m very nervous about my grandmother being sick. The adult can say (in a quivering, quiet voice), “I don’t know what to do.”

 The selected kid must guess the adult’s emotion by stating, “You are feeling ______________________.”  If the selected kid guesses the correct emotion, he/she gets one letter of the word SHOES. If the selected

kid makes an incorrect guess, the adult spins again and selects a new kid to take a guess.

 The kids must keep track of the letters they have.  Kids continue playing until time is up or until someone spells SHOES.  Once time is up, discuss why it is important to recognize how others feel and step into their shoes.

Responsible Decision Making Discussion Learning Objective: Kids will learn what peer pressure looks and feels like. Kids will learn how to say “no”.

 Pressure is when something pushes down on something else.  For example, you put pressure on your feet every time you walk. Your body is pushing down on your feet.  Can you give another example of something putting pressure on something else by pushing down?  Negative peer pressure is when other people try to get you to do something that they want you to do, but you

don’t really want to do it or you know that doing it is bad.  Many times friends use negative peer pressure to get each other to do something wrong.  For example, if your friends want you to take some candy off your teacher’s desk, they keep bothering you and

telling you to do it until they get you to do something that is wrong, stealing.  What does it feel like when other people put pressure on you?  It is wrong to let other people pressure you into doing something that you know is wrong.  It is okay to tell people “no” when they are trying to get you to do something wrong.  It’s a good idea to “brush the pressure off” when you feel pressured to do something wrong.  Whenever you feel like other people are trying to get you do something wrong, just brush the pressure off your

shoulders, tell them no, and walk away.  Don’t worry about them making fun of you. You should never allow people to push down on you and make you

do things you don’t want to do.  Don’t let someone pressure you into teasing or bullying other kids. Bullying is NOT ok.

Silent Dynamite Circle Game Responsible Decision Making Learning Objective: Kids will learn what peer pressure looks and feels like. Kids will also learn how to say no.

 A soft ball is needed and the kids stand in a circle.  The adult is the “Caller”.  The caller gives a special command to the group and can change the command at any time. Examples of

commands are: Catch with elbows, catch with thumbs, throw with your opposite hand, spin around 3 times before throwing, etc.

 The kids are spread out around the room then toss and catch the ball to one and another, silently (hence the name, Silent Dynamite.)

 When the caller yells “Boom” whoever has the ball pauses.  The adult gives the child with the ball a scenario involving peer pressure. That child has to give an

appropriate way to say no or avoid that situation.  If the child doesn’t give a proper response to the scenario, that child has to go in the middle and sit. Be

sure to talk with the group about what an appropriate response would be.  If a child cannot complete the given command or drops the ball, he/she sits in the middle.  The kids in the middle try to swat down or catch the ball as it is tossed around the room. If a child in the

middle successfully catches the ball he/she gets back into the game. The game is over when there is only one person left standing from the original circle.

You Can TRUST Me Relationship Skills Discussion Learning Objective: Kids will identify the components of a trusting relationship. They will experience sharing confidences and maintaining confidentiality in building a safe and trusting environment.

 What is trust?  To trust someone means that you can tell them anything and you know they won’t tell your secrets or

make fun of you. It means that they would never lie to you and you would never lie to them. It means that you know they will always be there for you. It also means that you would never hurt them.

 People who can be trusted, follow rules, keep promises, are not mean to others, and don’t take things that don’t belong to them.

Ask your child these questions (he/she doesn’t have to answer out loud)

o Do you tell lies? o Do you make fun of others for the things they tell you? o Do you spread rumors or gossip about others? o Do you hurt people that are supposed to be your friends?

Offer this explanation: If you answered yes to any of these questions, that means you aren’t very trustworthy. Let’s focus on 5 easy things you can remind yourself in order to stay trustworthy: T TRUTH - Tell the truth R RESPECT - Respect others (don’t spread rumors or gossip) U UNDERSTANDING – Understand and accept others S SUPPORT- Support others during good and bad times T THANK – Thank others for being in your life Oftentimes, kids get mad or angry at friends and decide to spread gossip or rumors….gossip and rumors are hurtful and are a form of bullying. Make sure you are TRUSTworthy. Don’t spread gossip and rumors.

Activity Learning Objective: Kids will identify the components of a trusting relationship. They will experience sharing confidences and maintaining confidentiality in building a safe and trusting environment.

 Divide the group of kids in half and have each group make a circle.  Remind the group that they are working on trusting each other and being able to share things.  For the first few rounds, the adult thinks of a few “kid appropriate” secrets that he/she has (for example:

"I still sleep with a stuffed animal” or “I am afraid of flying” or “When I was in 3rd grade I cheated on a test”, etc.)

 The adult selects one child from each group and quietly tells them both his/her secret, making sure both kids heard it.

 On “go”, both kids return to their groups and pass the adult’s secret around the circle by whispering into each other’s ears as quickly as possible.

 The secret can only be stated twice so kids must listen to each other.  Once the secret makes it to the end of the circle, the last child runs to the adult and repeats what they

heard as the secret. If it is correct, that group gets a T if it is wrong, they are told no and the first kid must start the secret again.

 This continues for a few rounds as groups try to spell the word TRUST.  Throughout the game, the adult should remind kids of the points talked about during the discussion and

how to use the letters of TRUST:

T Tell the truth R Respect each other U Uphold agreements S Share thoughts and things T Treat others how you want to be treated

 After a few rounds, if the adult thinks their group can handle it, they can allow kids to come up with the secrets to pass around the circles.

 In order to keep kids from being embarrassed to share, adults should have kids write down their secrets without names on the paper and then have the adult randomly pick which secrets to pass around.

 Remind the group that sharing secrets is an important way to build trust.