Communication and Conflict

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In this course, conflict is “an expressed struggle between at least two interdependent parties who perceive incompatible goals, scarce resources, and interference from others in achieving their goals.” In addition to this definition, it is important to remember that conflict varies in intensity and range, from avoidance to violence.

The choice of conflict approach, then, may range from low coercion to increased coercion of the other party. We must also consider that transforming a conflict depends on perceptual and/or conceptual change in one or more of the parties. As a result, perception is at the core of all conflict analysis. In conflict situations, it is especially common for our perceptions of others’ motivations to be inaccurate. For example, we may make attributions of another person’s intentions that may have gone unexpressed. If these intentions are not communicated, you will be left making assumptions about others’ interests and goals in a conflict. The same may also occur in terms of differences in attitudes and values between two parties in a conflict.

Perhaps the most important goals in any conflict are based on four primary questions that we often ask about ourselves and about others:

1. What do we want (Topic goal)?

2. Who are we to each other (Relational goal)?

3. Who am I in this interaction (Identity goal)?

4. What communication process will be used (Process goal)?

These questions represent - topic, relational, identity, and process goals, respectively. We should remember that although each of these goals may be understood in isolation, they will often occur simultaneously during a conflict. At the minimum, then, we should understand — for

Reading and Resources

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ourselves — where we would answer these four questions in any conflict while keeping in mind that the other person may answer them quite differently. Communicating about these differences then becomes the basis for transforming conflict into a constructive experience.

Ideally, we should seek to come together with others by cooperating to reach agreement that will reduce the escalation through attentiveness and a long-term focus. Maintaining these goals at the same time will allow you to develop more constructive rather than destructive conflict.

Read Chapter 3: Interests and Goals in Interpersonal Conflict. In this chapter, Hocker and Wilmot discuss various interests and goals. According to the authors, core personal issues will affect what we want in conflict situations. These issues are often directly related to our attitudes, values, and attributions of others that, ultimately, produce our preference and orientation toward conflict. The authors note that there are various types of goals (e.g., content, relational, identity, process), as well as goals that may change during communication (e.g., prospective goals, transactive goals, retrospective goals). Finally, they suggest that, in order to engage in constructive conflict, you will need to clarify your own personal goals and seek to establish collaborative goals with others.

Case Study: Review the Unit 2 Case Study, “Half Empty/Half Full”

Be sure to click on the Key Terms link for definitions of key terms in this chapter.