Assignment: Using the “Ten Tips for a Clear Writing Style”
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TenTipsforaClearWritingStyle2.pptxFrom Writing in the Works (7th ed.)
By Susan Blau and Kathryn Burak
Ten Tips for a Clear Writing Style
1. CUT CLUTTER
Use clear language to help your reader understand your thinking.
Wordy language only clutters what you are trying to say.
WORDY: The students who won the prizes will meet the judges at the conference on the day when they hold the dinner to commemorate their work.
CLEAR: The prize-winning students will meet the judges at the conference’s commemorative dinner.
2. AVOID REDUNDANCY
Be aware of the meanings of words you select. Be careful not to use adjectives or adverbs that repeat or take away from the meaning of the words they describe.
EXAMPLES OF REDUNDANCY:
Very unique Tall skyscraper
Refer back End result
Repeat again Cooperate together
Free complimentary dinner Basic fundamentals
Smiled happily
3. LIMIT QUALIFIERS
Qualifiers (such as adjectives and adverbs) limit or modify other words, and they also add color and texture to writing. However, some qualifiers – such as many, somewhat, very, relatively, and rather – do the opposite; they make writing dull.
EXAMPLE:
The constant use of the adjective little (except to indicate size) is particularly debilitating; we should all try to do a little better, we should all be very watchful of this rule, for it is a rather important one, and we are pretty sure to violate it now and then. – E.B. White, The Elements of Style
What qualifiers are unnecessary in the above sentence?
4. CUT IT IS AND THERE ARE FROM YOUR WRITING
Try to avoid beginning sentences with It is or There are. These are unnecessary expressions that prevent your reader from getting to the point of the sentence.
ORIGINAL: There are two cats sleeping in the bay window.
REWRITE: Two cats sleep in the bay window.
5. USE YOUR NATURAL VOCABULARY
Sometimes writers are tempted to pump some air into flabby prose by inflating their language. Almost always, the result sounds awkward, unnatural, even confusing. When you use your natural vocabulary, words that have meaning and nuance for you, you can communicate more precisely, more clearly, and with more authority.
PUMPED UP: The deleterious result of prolixity in writing results in obfuscatory textual material.
NATURAL: Wordiness results in confusing writing.
6. LIMIT JARGON
Jargon is used by many professionals who speak to each other in a kind of specialized language. It is tempting to try out “insider” language, but try to avoid that temptation.
7. AVOID EUPHEMISM
Euphemism is language that covers up the truth – either out of prudery (using powder room instead of bathroom or bathroom instead of toilet), sensitivity (using passed on instead of died), or the desire to sound more respectful or elevated (using waste disposal personnel instead of garbage collectors). Euphemisms can make your writing sound wordy and pretentious.
8. USE THE ACTIVE VOICE (Most of the Time)
A sentence is in the active or passive voice depending on whether the subject of the sentence performs or receives the action. In the active voice, the subject is the actor. In the passive voice, the subject receives the action. PASSIVE: The president was elected by the voters in a landslide victory. ACTIVE: Voters elected the president in a landslide victory. In general, avoid passive voice. Certain genres, however, call for the passive voice. For example, lab reports (“Liquid was poured into the test tube”) use passive voice, because they focus on what happened and what actions occurred, not who performed those actions.
IDENTIFYING ACTIVE AND PASSIVE VOICES
Identify whether these sentences are active or passive and rewrite any passive-voice sentences in the active voice.
1. Saving Private Ryan was viewed by my entire history class.
2. Super Bowl ads are watched more avidly than the game itself.
3. The New Year’s Eve party was attended by the rich and famous.
4. The band played its final set to the audience’s loud approval.
5. World War II was won in 1945.
6. World War II ended in 1945.
9. USE DESCRIPTIVE NOUNS
Readers remember specifics, not generalities. If a person you are describing sits under a tree, let you readers know if the tree is a redwood or a pine, if it is old and gnarled or a sapling.
EXAMPLES:
A really tall building = a skyscraper
An extremely cheap person = a miser
A lot of good food = a feast
10. USE STRONG VERBS
Strong verbs describe or express action, giving a sentence its energy and power. Weak verbs do the opposite; they deaden sentences. Select strong verbs that are precise for clear meaning.
ORIGINAL: I looked at the book very carefully.
MORE PRECISE: I scrutinized the book. Any time you can substitute an active verb for a form of to be (am, is, are, was, were, being ,been), you can infuse some liveliness into your sentence.
WEAK: There was a thief robbing my building.
STRONGER: A thief robbed my building.
Editing Using the 10 Tips
Revise this passage using the ten tips we just discussed.
There are a lot of people doing research today who are conducting an investigation into how the things in our heads work. The question they are looking to answer is how our brains store stuff. One woman in psychology is focusing on animal studies. Dr. Phyllis Johnson is doing experiments with rats who are running around in confusing places. She is looking to find out how neurological impulses work as these rodents are going through the mazes. A man who is also in psychology, Dr. Louis Young, is working with human subjects who are students at the local college. These subjects will be doing things inside magnetic resonance imaging machines. It is hoped that these things that they do will be providing answers to long-standing questions about stuff we remember.
