Modification for a essay

Name：Tai Xiong Comment by Microsoft Office User: This is not a correct MLA heading.

Class: English 101

Date: October 4, 2019

Judgment and Faith in “‘Young Goodman Brown”’

The concept of religion, faith, and judgement have long been a part of the literary canon, and. aA good example of literature that deals with these themes is Nathaniel Hawthorne’s short story ‘Young Goodman Brown’ (1835). The story follows the life and journey of a young Goodman Brown as he encounters ideas that go against his own understanding of what faith and religion is. Hawthorne makes two very strong points in his story: the first is the deceit of the so-called religious people, and the second is the judgment put upon people who are supposed to be on the wrong path by those who believe themselves to be in the right. To drive this point home Hawthorne The text frequently puts two opposing ideas together in his story to create confusion and doubt in the reader’s minds and so that they could make up their own minds about these concepts. Hawthorne “Young Goodman Brown” presents a strong contrast for the ideas of faith and judgement which are closely linked as those who have faith often judge those who seem to deviate from their version of faith as devil-worshippers and evil-doers. Comment by Microsoft Office User: Beware arguing authorial intent. Say something along the lines “The text makes two very strong points:” thereby taking Hawthorne out of the equation. It is impossible to argue what someone meant to do when writing the piece unless you are that person, so carefully wording arguments to focus on the text help to make your argument one you can support via the text alone. Comment by Microsoft Office User: Avoid phrases that are too colloquial. Comment by Microsoft Office User: These two sentences are somewhat repetitive of each other, so I would suggest combining the ideas in both to create a much stronger thesis sentence. Also, you need to grapple more with the “so what” of the thesis. Your larger idea is that there are two opposing ideas within the text that leaves the readers able to make up their own minds about the ideas; however, you never introduce an argument about why readers should care about this argument. How should this make readers think about their lives and their world in a different light? This “so what” introduced in the thesis will then be fleshed out within your conclusion paragraph. Comment by Microsoft Office User: Part 1 of your thesis: there are two opposing ideas at war with each other within the text (the judgement of those who see themselves on the righteous path vs. those righteous people only appearing righteous. Comment by Microsoft Office User: The waring ideas allows for readers to come to their own conclusions regarding these ideas.

Goodman Brown represents the innocence and naiveté of youth and how quick they are to judge. The beginning of the story shows Goodman Brown as a youth who is just starting out in adulthood and he has many innocent ideas and views about others. However, as he begins his journey into the dark night with the devil, he comes across many people he had believed to be good Christians, but who are seemingly proceeding for a gathering of the devil himself. Thus, Brown begins to understand more deeply the people around him and the truth of their hearts. Brown’s judgement about people being good and faithful changes as he is very quick in now judging these same people as devil-worshippers and evil-doers, and no longer respects or loves them as he used to. Thus, his judgement had a deep impact on his behaviour and thinking. ‘“"Friend,’" said he, stubbornly, ‘"my mind is made up. Not another step will I budge on this errand. What if a wretched old woman do choose to go to the devil when I thought she was going to heaven: is that any reason why I should quit my dear Faith and go after her?"’” (Hawthorne 225-26). As is apparent from these lines from the story, Brown has made up his mind not just that he would not lose his faith, but also that the woman he had thought to be a goodf Christian is in fact a wretched person doomed for the hell fires. Brown is shown to be a judgemental person who quickly judges others for their supposed misdeed even though he himself is on a journey with the devil. Therefore, the point that the narrator makes is everyone believes themselves to be good Christians and people of faith. but they are quick to label others as wicked while disregarding their own actions and behaviours completely. Comment by Microsoft Office User: This paragraph deals with the personification of Goodman Brown. Comment by Microsoft Office User: Make sure to introduce quotes in your own words so that readers know the context of the quote as well as the types of ideas they should be focusing on when reading the lines to better aid in your argument. Comment by Microsoft Office User: When you are quoting within a quote you use apostrophes for the interior quote and quotation marks for the overall quote.

Hawthorne presents the ideas of faith and religion as deep illusions that cloud people’s judgment. On the surface, Hawthorne’s the short story might seem like a critique on people who are bad Christians, but on a closer inspection it seems like Hawthorne it is actually criticizing people who judge others to be bad Christians basing their opinions on of their own supposed piety. So, he the text presents religion and faith as a force which, if taken to the extreme, actually hurts and clouds people’s judgement more than clearing up their path and vision. ‘“"With heaven above and Faith below, I will yet stand firm against the devil!’" cried Goodman Brown. While he still gazed upward into the deep arch of the firmament and had lifted his hands to pray, a cloud, though no wind was stirring, hurried across the zenith and hid the brightening stars.” (Hawthorne 227). These lines clearly illustrate how Hawthorne the text presents the proclamation of faith as a cloud of doubt that hides the horizon. Thus, Hawthorne the short story makes it clear that faith and religion can only clear one’s vision if it is without criticism and resentment for others who believe differently. Comment by Microsoft Office User: As I mentioned above, careful of authorial intent. You don’t have any in your first body paragraph, but you do a few times in this one. Comment by Microsoft Office User: This topic sentence lacks a transition word/phrase. Comment by Microsoft Office User: This paragraph is dealing with symbolism. Comment by Microsoft Office User: This is a really great point! Comment by Microsoft Office User: Make sure to introduce quotes in your own words so that readers know the context of the quote as well as the types of ideas they should be focusing on when reading the lines to better aid in your argument. Comment by Microsoft Office User: When you are quoting within a quote you use apostrophes for the interior quote and quotation marks for the overall quote.

Fear becomes an integral part of people of faith as they continually worry about losing it. The contrast of judgment, faith, and fear that Hawthorne presents culminates in a tragic ending of the story. In the beginning, we see Brown as a hopeful young person, but in the end he dies a sad old man, never really able to love anyone as he judged them too harshly in his mind and feared that he too would lose his faith if he interacted with them too much. Even his own wife is no exception for his poor treatment. The final paragraph of the story is a deep commentary on people of faith as Brown himself has become that man of sin he had feared all his life others of being. “A stern, a sad, a darkly meditative, a distrustful, if not a desperate man did he become …holy psalm, he could not listen because an anthem of sin rushed loudly upon his ear and drowned all the blessed strain…” (Hawthorne 231). Here Hawthorne shows how Brown’s fear overcomes his love and he becomes a sad man and again he shows how he pulls away from the people who loved him and the people of his community … “at morning or eventide, when the family knelt down at prayer, he scowled and muttered to himself, and gazed sternly at his wife, and turned away. And when he had lived long, and was borne to his grave a hoary corpse…they carved no hopeful verse upon his tombstone, for his dying hour was gloom.” (Hawthorne 231). These lines are extremely important as they reveal that the true measure of faith is to live in communion with others and love them and be merry with them. but Brown’s harsh judgement prevent him from doing anything that joined him together with others rather he lives an isolated life and dies in the same sad solitude. Comment by Microsoft Office User: This topic sentence lacks a transition word/phrase. Comment by Microsoft Office User: Not quite sure how this topic sentence connects directly to your thesis statement. Comment by Microsoft Office User: Beware authorial intent Comment by Microsoft Office User: Avoid first person pronouns in essays- too colloquial. Comment by Microsoft Office User: The syntax here makes it difficult for me to understand what you are trying to say. Comment by Microsoft Office User: Make sure to introduce quotes in your own words so that readers know the context of the quote as well as the types of ideas they should be focusing on when reading the lines to better aid in your argument. Comment by Microsoft Office User: The narrator- make sure not to conflate the author and the narrator, they are two very different forces in the text. Comment by Microsoft Office User: Vague “he” Comment by Microsoft Office User: Make sure to introduce quotes in your own words so that readers know the context of the quote as well as the types of ideas they should be focusing on when reading the lines to better aid in your argument. Comment by Microsoft Office User: Based on the way your argument builds, you second body paragraph and first body paragraphs should be flipped. Your second body paragraph focuses on the themes overall, while body paragraphs 1 and 3 deal directly with Young Goodman Brown and clearly build off of one another.

In conclusion, the narrator presents a deep reflection on the ideas of faith and judgement. He shows how people can isolate themselves from fear of doubt. He shows that the best way to live a life is to be together with others instead of creating separation and division based on illusory ideas of evil, sin, and the devil as faith and disbelief are simply two sides of the same coin and both equally important for a fair understanding of the complete picture of life. Comment by Microsoft Office User: Yes; however, so what? Your conclusion paragraph is simply summarizing your argument (which has already been stated throughout the paper) when it should be arguing why that argument should matter to the reader. As stated in the rubric, a perfect thesis “goes beyond simply summarizing the rest of the paper to expand on the larger importance of the topic (alludes to a possible answer to the question ‘so what?’)”

Works Cited Hawthorne, Nathaniel. "Young Goodman Brown." n.d. 221-232.