Discussion: Student Response

Student: Devara Walton

Rapport and Relational Alignment

· Bruce is transitioning from the blaming position and is moving towards willing position (Kollar, 2011, p. 86). In the beginning he blamed Justin due to a preconceived notion that he had of Justin. Bruce wants to meet with Justin to see if his perception of him changed.

· Bruce used Technique #19 (Tears) in private meeting with Justin. “when your talker starts crying, don’t let tears stop you from listening” (Petersen, 2015, p. 173). “Find our what the tears are about” (Petersen, 2015, p. 173). Bruce felt Justin was genuinely sorry.

· Bruce is a “D”. He is seen by others and me as confident, stubborn, and determined (Carbonell, 2008, p. 19). In Bruce’s meeting with Justin, I am a little concerned that Justin may have found him intimidating and threatening (Carbonell, 2008).

· As a “D/S/C” (Professional Leader/DISC Profile) I know firsthand that Bruce a “D” listens best to straightforward communication (Carbonell, 2008). However, I cannot be too assertive with him. I must do roll play demonstrations to show how his assertive, controlling nature is damaging his relationship with is son Brody. I feel this will definitely help because his is a visual learner. Using different techniques that best work for “D”s will allow me to continue building rapport with Bruce.

Phase Two Distinctive Features

· Goal: To get Brue to see the humane side of Justin / Assist Bruce on how to communicate properly with Brody.

· Chief Aim: Assist Bruce with Communication without control. Brody is a Flat-Brain of emotions (Petersen, 2015). Learning how to communicate with him properly is the key to having a healthy relationship.

· Role/responsibility: I will be using Petersen’s TLC (Talker-Listener Card) to assist with Bruce’s communication with Brody (Petersen, 2015, p. 77).

· Use of Guided Assumption: Counselee is always changing. Bruce has gone from blaming Justin for the death of his wife and daughter to wanting to see Justin’s true heart. His eyes are opening to the environment in which high school students dwell in.

Supportive Feed Back

· When dealing with Brody Bruce should:

· Be patient: give him time to heal

· Maintain Friendships: do not allow him to seclude himself. Keep his routine normal

· Feel the Pain: Bruce should express to Brody that it is ok to hurt. Relate to him and share his story of hurt. This will give them some commonality

· Realize Grief is Normal: Bruce should Affirm that the pain that Brody feels is ok. It suppose to hurt. His suppose to be angry.

· Heal: Bruce and affirm Brody with lets heal together.

Phase Two Marker

Food For Thought

· It is normal to feel awkward and fake when learning new techniques. You have to what I call fake it until you are comfortable with it. Every session is a learning experience for both counselor and counselee. The difference is the counselor have to be confident within his/her self. The counselee will never know.

Reference

Clinton, Tim. 2009. The Quick-Refernace Guide to Biblical Counseling. Baker Books.

Kollar, Charles, 2011. Solution-Focused Pastoral Counseling. Zondervan.

Petersen, James C. 2015. Why Don't we Listen Better?. Petersen Publications.