Assignment 8: "Proposal Critique

Assignment 8: "Proposal Critique"

Ronald E Miller

Prof. Morrison, Anna C.

ENG 316 Technical Communications

March 11, 2018

ASSIGNMENT TABLE OF CONTENTS

Original proposal ………. 3

Rewritten Proposal ……..

ORIGINAL PROPOSAL WITH EDITS

A Proposal

To: Mason Office Center (No Name Indicated)

From: Ronald Miller (No Name Indicated)

Date: March 11, 2018 (No Date Indicated)

Subject: Proposal for Plant Service Proposal to Address Interior Design Concerns

I am submitting this proposal addressing the interior concerns, for your review. This proposal addresses the concerns identified by customers and employees regarding the interior design of the Mason Office Center. The goal of this proposal is to provide a cost-effective solution to the concerns brought to my attention.

Topics of interest:

Thank you for taking the time to review the suggestions outlined in this proposal. I look forward to your response. Should you decide to implement the suggested solutions outlined in this proposal, we are ready to move forward immediately.

(ADD Cover Page)

(Add Table of Contents)

(Add Executive Summary)

EXECUTIVE SUMMARY

Feedback from employees and customers regarding the design appearance of the interior of the Mason Office Center suggest that the design of the building could be improved. The feedback identified two concerns, dull color walls making the interior unattractive, and an occasional odor throughout the building.

To address both of these concerns I suggest the cost-effective solution of adding plants throughout the building. Plants will add attractive colors throughout taking the attention away from the dull walls. Plants will also add oxygen and filter the air, eliminating the musty odor of the building.

The recommended changes will cost $1323.00 to implement and will cost $75.00 a month to maintain. These low costs will result in a building interior that is visually appealing and has a fresh clean smell.

INTRODUCTION (Added level 1 header)

Problem and Solution (Separate Problem and Solution)

The unattractive interior design and the musty odor or the Mason Office Center are a serious concern to both our customers and employees. The Mason Office Center contains four offices that the client considers unattractive to potential customers and employees. The unattractive design aspects outlined by the client include the dull white wall color. In addition to concerns regarding the design the client also want to address the unpleasant musty smell throughout the building.

Mason Office Center is a lovely Georgian building containing four offices. However, the interior is not attractive or inviting for clients/customers and employees. The off-white walls throughout the complex seem dull and boring, adjectives the tenants do not want associated with their businesses. In addition, the air in the building is musty and unpleasant at times. (Reworded)

Solution (Separate Problem and Solution)

Both the problem of attractiveness and the smell can be addressed with a single solution. To address the problems presented by the client Green Thumb Planting can provide place attractive plants throughout the building. The plants will provide attractive scenery to potential customers and current employees. The plants will take the attention away from the dull wall color, introduce more oxygen into the air, and purify the air. The services provided by Green Thumb Planting are a cost effective, and unobtrusive solution to the client’s problem.

Green Thumb Planting can provide and maintain a beautiful plantscape in the building that will attract visitors and employees as well as purify the air and introduce more oxygen. Research shows that people respond positively to interiors with at least two plants per room. These changes can be made in an unobtrusive, cost-effective manner. (Reworded)

Objectives (Eliminate of Proposed Plan)

The purpose of this proposal is to improve the air quality and interior design of the Mason Office Center. The proposed solution will address both of these concerns, increasing the attractiveness of the interior of the building, and ensuring the build smells clean and fresh. Increase the moral of employees and customers when they come inside the building, resulting in greater productivity.

of Proposed Plan

Installing plantings in Mason Office Center will give visitors and employees a more appealing and cleaner environment, producing positive feelings and greater productivity.(Reworded)

Background

Over the past several months employees have indicated an increase difficulty in gaining new customers due to their desire to leave building because of the smell and the interior design. In addition to this, customers have been overheard complaining about the smell throughout the build.

I have been in the interior plant maintenance business for 32 years and have owned and operated Green Thumb Planting for the last seven years. All associates with Green Thumb Planting take pride in their work, and Green Thumb is happy to provide references. (Reworded and Moved to Conclusion)

(Data Sources Omitted due to nature of the problem and the proposal)

Scope and Limitations (Add Scope and Limitations)

In seeking a solution to the interior design and smell of the Mason Office Center, we want to increase the look of the build without modifying the leased space. We also want to eliminate the musty odor with the expansive cost of an air filtration system. The solution needs to be low cost, address the smell concerns, address the interior design concerns, and be inexpensive to maintain.

Discussion (Exit Introduction and enter Discussion)

Methods

The service agreement will provide the plants, Pots, weekly maintenance of the plants, and monthly replacements of weak plants.

Once you sign your contract our design team will meet with you where we will discuss the number of plants, the type of plants, the color of the plants, the design of the vases, and the placement of the plants. The team will adjust the plan based on your preferences. It is expected that the meeting will occur within two weeks form the date of the contract signing.

All plant materials, including the soil are brought into the building in a specially designed trolley which prevents damage from the potential spillage of the materials.

(Reworded)

. (Moved back to scheduling)

Within two weeks of your signing a contract, our design team will interview you and produce a plan showing installation, including the number and types of plants, color and design of containers, and placement. The team will adjust the plan according to your preference.

Furthermore, Green Thumb is concerned about the environment and thus uses only organic methods. No harmful chemicals are used in its plantscapes. (Reworded Moved to Materials)

Based on Green Thumb’s design formula, the building could use 31 large and 14 medium-sized low-light plants. (Reworded and moved to Materials)

Green Thumb’s service agreement provides plants and pots, weekly maintenance, and monthly replacement of weak plants. (Reworded and moved to beginning)

Scheduling

After the design plan is fully realized and accepted, Green Thumb will schedule the installation, generally within one week. The installation, and maintenance of the plants can occur during evening hours if desired, to avoid interruptions of customers and employees.

Once started the job should be completed in two nights.

When a plan is agreed upon, Green Thumb will schedule installation within one week. Installation can be accomplished during the evening hours to avoid interrupting your tenants’ business activities. (Reworded)

All soil and materials will be brought into the building in specially designed trolleys to prevent spillage and damage to floors (Moved to Methods)

(Reworded)

Once the plantscape is installed, Green Thumb Planting staff will visit Mason Office Center once a week to maintain the plants.(Deleted Repetitive)

Capabilities and Qualifications of Personnel

I have a BS degree in landscape design and 32 years of experience in the business. In addition, all personnel have undergone thorough background and criminal checks and are bonded. Your satisfaction with Green Thumb’s plantings and employees are guaranteed. (Deleted section not needed can be included in conclusion)

Materials and Equipment (Section added)

Green thumbs current design plan calls for the following materials

· 31 large plants,

· 14 medium plants

· 31 large pots

· 14 medium pots

· Specialized Trolley for transportation of plants

All Green Thumb does plants are grown organically and contain no harmful chemicals.

. (Organized in unordered list format)

Budget

The total cost for the materials and labor is $1323.00 which is broken down below. In addition to this there is a 75$ monthly fee to maintain the plants. These are the only cost you will incur. The breakdown below is based on the current design and these costs may change based on you wants regarding plant species.

The installation cost is $923.40, and the monthly maintenance fee is $75.00 per month. You will incur no other charges to have an inviting, attractive, clean green environment in Mason Office Building. (Reworded, added new cost that accounts for labor)

Installation costs include the following:

31 large 6 braided ficus trees at $25 each $150.00

6 chamaedorea palms at $20 120.00

10 herb topiaries at $20 200.00

9 Chinese evergreens at $25 225.00

14 medium

5 moth orchids at $15 $ 75.00

9 angel ivy at $15 135.00

SUBTOTAL $905.00

Tax 8% 72.40

TOTAL $977.40

(Moved to an organized excel spreadsheet added labor cost)

Conclusion

If the conditions inside of the Mason Office Center are not improved, you may continue to see a decrease in employee morale and a decrease in customers. It is imperative that these low-cost modifications take place in order to resolve the problems associated with air quality, and design. This proposal will fix the current problems and will prevent the problem from reoccurring in the future. Given the low-cost, high-benefit nature we cannot think of a reason not to move forward with this solution. Should there be any concerns regarding this proposal please reach out to us so that we can address them.

With over 32 years’ experience in the business of interior plant design and maintenance, I confidant Green Thumb can meet all of your requirements.

Thank you for your consideration, when you are ready to move forward with this inexpensive, environmentally friendly, attractive proposed solution. Please send your memorandum of acceptance to Green Thumb Planting, 101 Sienna Way, Ayden, NC 28513-7101.

References available upon request.

For an effortless, inexpensive, attractive, clean environment at Mason Office Center, accept Green Thumb’s proposal. Please send a memorandum of acceptance to (Reworded)

Green Thumb Planting, 101 Sienna Way, Ayden, NC 28513-7101.(Moved to end of reworded conclusion)

(Removed Footer Not Applicable to proposal)

REWRITTEN PROPOSAL

To: Mason Office Center

From: Ronald E Miller

Green Thumb (CEO)

Date: March 11, 2018

Subject: Proposal to Address Interior Design Concerns

I am submitting this proposal addressing the interior concerns, for your review. This proposal addresses the concerns identified by customers and employees regarding the interior design of the Mason Office Center. The goal of this proposal is to provide a cost-effective solution to the concerns brought to my attention.

Topics of interest:

Executive Summary ……..… 5

Problem ……..….………….. 6

Solution ...………………….. 6

Budget …………………...… 8

Thank you for taking the time to review the suggestions outlined in this proposal. I look forward to your response. Should you decide to implement the suggested solutions outlined in this proposal, we are ready to move forward immediately.

PROPOSAL FOR IMPROVED AIR QUALITY AND DESIGN OF THE MASON OFFICE CENTER

Prepared for

Mason Office Center, Manager

Prepared by

Ronald E Miller, (CEO) Green Thumbs

March 11, 2018

Table of Contents EXECUTIVE SUMMARY 18 INTRODUCTION 5 Problem 5 Solution 5 Objectives 5 Background 6 Scope and Limitations 6 DISCUSSION 7 Methods 7 Scheduling 7 Materials and Equipment 7 Budget 8 CONCLUSION 9

Feedback from employees and customers regarding the design appearance of the interior of the Mason Office Center suggest that the design of the building could be improved. The feedback identified two concerns, dull color walls making the interior unattractive, and an occasional odor throughout the building.

To address both of these concerns I suggest the cost-effective solution of adding plants throughout the building. Plants will add attractive colors throughout taking the attention away from the dull walls. Plants will also add oxygen and filter the air, eliminating the musty odor of the building.

The recommended changes will cost $1323.00 to implement and will cost $75.00 a month to maintain. These low costs will result in a building interior that is visually appealing and has a fresh clean smell.

The unattractive interior design and the musty odor or the Mason Office Center are a serious concern to both our customers and employees. The Mason Office Center contains four offices that the client considers unattractive to potential customers and employees. The unattractive design aspects outlined by the client include the dull white wall color. In addition to concerns regarding the design the client also want to address the unpleasant musty smell throughout the building.

Both the problem of attractiveness and the smell can be addressed with a single solution. To address the problems presented by the client Green Thumb Planting can provide place attractive plants throughout the building. The plants will provide attractive scenery to potential customers and current employees. The plants will take the attention away from the dull wall color, introduce more oxygen into the air, and purify the air. The services provided by Green Thumb Planting are a cost effective, and unobtrusive solution to the client’s problem.

The purpose of this proposal is to improve the air quality and interior design of the Mason Office Center. The proposed solution will address both of these concerns, increasing the attractiveness of the interior of the building, and ensuring the build smells clean and fresh. Increase the moral of employees and customers when they come inside the building, resulting in greater productivity.

Over the past several months employees have indicated an increase difficulty in gaining new customers due to their desire to leave building because of the smell and the interior design. In addition to this, customers have been overheard complaining about the smell throughout the build.

In seeking a solution to the interior design and smell of the Mason Office Center, we want to increase the look of the build without modifying the leased space. We also want to eliminate the musty odor with the expansive cost of an air filtration system. The solution needs to be low cost, address the smell concerns, address the interior design concerns, and be inexpensive to maintain.

DISCUSSION

The service agreement will provide the plants, Pots, weekly maintenance of the plants, and monthly replacements of weak plants.

Once you sign your contract our design team will meet with you where we will discuss the number of plants, the type of plants, the color of the plants, the design of the vases, and the placement of the plants. The team will adjust the plan based on your preferences. It is expected that the meeting will occur within two weeks form the date of the contract signing.

All plant materials, including the soil are brought into the building in a specially designed trolley which prevents damage from the potential spillage of the materials.

After the design plan is fully realized and accepted, Green Thumb will schedule the installation, generally within one week. The installation, and maintenance of the plants can occur during evening hours if desired, to avoid interruptions of customers and employees.

Once started the job should be completed in two nights.

Green thumbs current design plan calls for the following materials

· 31 large plants,

· 14 medium plants

· 31 large pots

· 14 medium pots

· Specialized Trolley for transportation of plants

All Green Thumb does plants are grown organically and contain no harmful chemicals.

The total cost for the materials and labor is $1323.00 which is broken down below. In addition to this there is a 75$ monthly fee to maintain the plants. These are the only cost you will incur. The breakdown below is based on the current design and these costs may change based on you wants regarding plant species.

Installation costs include the following:

If the conditions inside of the Mason Office Center are not improved, you may continue to see a decrease in employee morale and a decrease in customers. It is imperative that these low-cost modifications take place in order to resolve the problems associated with air quality, and design. This proposal will fix the current problems and will prevent the problem from reoccurring in the future. Given the low-cost, high-benefit nature we cannot think of a reason not to move forward with this solution. Should there be any concerns regarding this proposal please reach out to us so that we can address them. With over 32 years’ experience in the business of interior plant design and maintenance, I’m confidant Green Thumb can meet all of your requirements.

Thank you for your consideration, when you are ready to move forward with this inexpensive, environmentally friendly, attractive proposed solution. Please send your memorandum of acceptance to Green Thumb Planting, 101 Sienna Way, Ayden, NC 28513-7101.

References available upon request.