conflict styles help

Smith - 1

Conflict Style Assessment and Analysis

Jane Student Smith

SOC 350 – Conflict Resolution

Siena Heights University

April 21, 2012

Analyzing personal conflict management styles is essential because conflict permeates every aspect of life, and effectively managing conflict can improve relationships at home, school, and work. To understand how I can better handle conflict we will explore my strengths and weaknesses and then discuss the benefits of improved conflict management skills. We will do this by examining my assessment results, discussing known information about conflict resolution tactics, and evaluating strategies that may work better for me.

After completing the Conflict Style Analysis assignment, I was able to examine my own perceptions and compare and contrast them with the opinions of two other people who know me well. During this process it became clear that my dominant styles are compromise, accommodation, and collaboration, while my secondary styles are avoidance and competition. I was quite surprised to see that my styles varied between my home and work environments, and even more surprised that my evaluators’ assessments were quite different from my own assessment. What I discovered was that I had more improvements to make than I originally thought.

BACKGROUND/RESEARCH

Research for this study was completed using the Conflict Styles Analysis worksheet provided in class. After I completed the survey, I asked my husband and my direct supervisor to complete the worksheets. I chose these two evaluators because they have known me for a long time, know me in contrasting roles, are able to be objective, and are willing to be candid. Additionally, I have a high degree of respect for both of these men and value their insight and opinions, and trust that their assessment responses are an accurate indication of my behaviors in the selected environments.

Analysis	Avoidance	Competition	Compromise	Accommodation	Collaboration
Self Analysis	11	10	24	16	21
Work-life Analysis	14	14	20	19	23
Home-life Analysis	17	12	23	22	24
Average	14	12	23	19	23

I compiled the raw data into the chart to display the data in a more concise, meaningful way. This chart allows the viewer to see key results in an unbiased fashion:

While the chart gives insight into the results I obtained, it does not adequately allow visualization of the implications of the data collected. For ease of comparison, and to gain a better understanding of the trends in my behavior, I created a line-chart. The chart vividly displays global preferences in my choices of conflict management styles. Additionally, it allows the viewer to see how my perceptions are not entirely congruent with the other two evaluators and how, although similar, my conflict management styles vary between work and home life. The line-chart is displayed below:

My usage of the five styles of conflict management is summarized below:

· Avoidance - I scored highest on this style at home, and self-rated this style significantly lower than my evaluators. Avoidance tactics are often used as a method to side-step or deflect conflict, and sometimes multiple avoidance tactics are used at once. Avoiding conflict is both “unassertive and uncooperative”, and leads to a “lose/lose” situation because the conflict is ignored, instead of resolved (Lussier & Achua, 2010, p. 211).

· Competition - I scored higher on this style at work than home, yet both scores were higher than I self-scored. Competition is generally associated with negative connotations, like confrontation, attempts to “win” arguments at the expense of others, and may lead to aggressive, rather than assertive, behaviors in high conflict situations (Wilmot & Hocker, 2007, p. 145).

· Accommodation - This behavior was scored in the upper teens to low twenties by both evaluators. I, however, gave this area a modest score of 16. Accommodation is one of the most widely used methods of conflict managements, and is used to promote peace and harmony while giving up self interests (Wilmot & Hocker, 2007).

· Collaboration – This style was given an average score of 23, and my evaluators gave me modestly higher scores than I did in this area. Collaboration is an assertive style of conflict resolution where cooperation between parties helps facilitate a solution that is agreeable to all parties involved (Lussier & Achua, 2010).

· Compromise – My average score was a 23, yet I chose this method of conflict resolution at home more than work. Compromise is a style where all the parties involved make some concessions to reach a mutually agreeable outcome. As a mildly assertive and cooperative style, this style is often confused with collaboration, however, compromise involves “trade-offs and exchanges” (Wilmot & Hocker, 2007, p. 157).

ANALYSIS

My self-scoring of this assessment was lower in the more negative styles of conflict management than it was in the more positive styles. While no style is inherently negative, as they all have appropriate uses, avoidance, competition, and accommodation are conflict styles that can have negative results when used in the wrong situation. Conflict styles like collaboration and compromise have more positive attributes associated with them, and while I scored high in both these areas, for the purpose of self improvement, we will continue to focus on the areas where I have the most room for growth.

In reviewing the results it is obvious that I believe that I use avoidance, competition, and accommodation less frequently than my evaluators. After thoughtful reflection and applying the information I know about conflict management styles, I have summarized my analysis of the three areas below:

· Avoidance – the two biggest offensives I commit are joking about a topic and changing subjects when I don’t want to talk or deal with a situation that makes me uncomfortable. I also occasionally use the “twin cycle of avoidance” style two at home, where avoidance leads to escalation, and then a return to avoidance behaviors (Wilmot & Hocker, 2007, p.137). Avoidance is a negative means of handling conflict in my life, and has the ability to alienate my loved ones.

· Competition – I am more competitive than I’d like to, or need to, be. The biggest challenge I face in this area is being aggressive, instead of assertive. While I use this area often at work under urgent conditions, and where this style is an accepted norm, I also tend to use this style when time isn’t a mitigating factor (Wilmot & Hocker, 2007, p. 146). I frequently use this style as a means to change the opinion or position of others when I am not willing to change my own (Lussier &Achua, 2010).

· Accommodation –. I regularly engage in this behavior, and it leaves me at risk for not asserting my needs and desires well, which often leaves me feeling unappreciated. I use this tactic most often in an effort to repair damage from times when I acted a little more aggressive than I meant to be. Accommodation is a style where the user is unassertive but cooperative, and is different from avoidance because in accommodation the user confronts the conflict, but passively allows the other party to “get their own way” (Lussier & Achua, 2010, p. 212).

OPINION

I think that I can use conflict management styles more effectively. I don’t believe that I am using them to the best of my ability, and it is evidenced by not only my behaviors during conflict, but the outcomes as well. When I use my native tactics I really have the best of intentions, but applying them in the wrong situations has lead to some problems in both my personal and professional life. When I engage in these conflict management styles, I am genuinely trying to problem solve, even though my attempts are often ineffective. After careful reflection, I have summarized my opinions below:

· Competition - I don’t mean to use phrases that are counterproductive to conflict management, or be aggressive. By identifying the thought pattern that accompanies them and reframing my perception of the events, I can prevent myself from using aggressive speech.

· Avoiding - What I am really trying to do is keep the peace. However, when I feel used or unappreciated, I tend to become competitive and then feel bad for the way I acted or things I said, so I return to the avoidance style. Avoidance tactics can sometimes be positive, as it affords me time to deliberate about a situation, but, more often than not, I use it in an unhealthy way.

· Accommodation - In a heated dispute, I use tactics like “giving up/giving in” or disengage in the conflict, especially if I have been a little aggressive in my attempts to “win the argument” (Wilmot & Hocker, 2007, p. 161). While accommodation can work well in situations where the relationship means more than the conflict, but can also be counterproductive to conflict resolution (Lussier & Achua, 2010).

CONCLUSION

I really believed that I had a pretty good handle on my conflict management skills. What I didn’t realize was how much I didn’t know about my habits. I learned that my preconceived notions about my conflict management styles actually interfere with my personal growth. I realize that I have the power to:

· Become more solution oriented instead of avoiding issues.

· Decrease competition by being more cooperative with others and fostering an environment of “constructive conflict” by working toward collaborative solutions with others (Wilmot & Hocker, 2007, p. 147).

· More effectively assert my needs instead of accommodating as a response to being a little too competitive or aggressive in a previous conflict.

I learned that some of my natural styles of conflict management more than a little dysfunctional (Wilmot & Hocker, 2007). However, developing other styles of conflict management styles can help improve my ability to successfully navigate disagreements and disputes. Increasing productive behaviors and employing positive methods of approaching conflict has many benefits in my relationships with others. As a matter of fact, effectively managing conflict is described as a central task “of maintaining a marriage”, and serves as a model for my children (Wilmot & Hocker, 2007, p. 3). By ending the avoidance-competition-avoidance cycle I am able to help all of us constructively manage conflict and, more fully, enjoy life together. While avoidance, competition, and accommodation have valid uses at times, my findings indicate that I am able to use collaboration, compromise, and synergistic tactics more often than I do (Covey, 2011).

Thank you for the opportunity to explore more appropriate styles of conflict management and the opportunity improve my relationships with others. I am planning on pursuing further education in conflict resolution. My employer offers a conflict resolution class based on The 3rd Alternative by Steven Covey, and I have been approved to take it this summer. Taking these steps will help me become more cooperative and solution oriented, better able to resolve problems and strengthen relationships, as well as growing as a person, wife, mother, and team member at work.

References

Covey, S. (2011). The 3rd alternative: Solving life's most difficult problems.   New York, NY: Free Press.

Lussier, R., & Achua, C. (2010). Leadership: Theory, application & skill development (4th ed.). Mason, OH: Cengage Learning.

Wilmot, W., & Hocker, J. (2007). Interpersonal conflict (7th ed.). New York, NY: McGraw Hill.

Self Analysis Avoidance Competition Compromise Accommodation Collaboration 11 10 24 16 21 Work-life Analysis Avoidance Competition Compromise Accommodation Collaboration 14 14 20 19 23 Home-life Analysis Avoidance Competition Compromise Accommodation Collaboration 17 12 23 22 24 Average Avoidance Competition Compromise Accommodation Collaboration 14 12 23 19 23