Anatomy of Forgiveness Replies

    The Anatomy of Forgiveness and Reconciliation      

1. What 3 ideas from your most recent course readings help to explain the forgiveness and reconciliation expressed in this moment? Explain your selection of ideas.

According to Warmke (2017), there are two major approaches to divine forgiveness, including the view that God forgives by undergoing certain emotional change like eliminating resentment, and that God forgives by forbearing punishment. The Forgiveness Reconciliation model developed by Balkin et al. (2014) emphasizes a process of collaborative exploration and decision-making based on a concept of forgiveness derived from Judaism. Hence, forgiveness and reconciliation are interlinked, and reconciliation cannot occur without forgiveness, while forgiveness requires reconciliation to be complete. For humans, reconciliation consists of reestablishing friendly communications, affirming mutual trust and goodwill, giving gifts or tokens expressing care and concern, and giving assurance that we can go on together, among other things (Warmke, 2017). However, it is a collaborative process in that it requires both parties to be interested in coming together for reconciliation to truly occur. As Warmke (2017) says, even if someone desires reconciliation, they cannot achieve it if the other party does not desire the same. In this way, it can be understood that the sort of forgiveness offered by God is also dependent on the person who is the target of forgiveness actually seeking to be reconciled with God. God forgives by being open to reconciling with us, in which case it implies that God has already done God's part in reconciliation by allowing us to repent and reconcile where we seek to do so.

 

2.   What biblical truth / scripture reference helps us to understand what we’re seeing? Explain your choice.

Matthew 18:15-17 says that if our brother sins against us, we should go and tell him our issue privately, and if he listens to us, then we have "gained our brother"; but if he does not listen, then we are compelled to bring others to witness his refusal, at which point, if such refusal persists, we are to let him be to us "as a Gentile and a tax collector." That is, we must be open to the idea of reconciling with one who has wronged us, and willing to forgive him by accepting that he has understood the error of his ways. At the same time, the offender must himself be open to the idea of being reconciled with us. If he has no interest in admitting his wrongdoing or even listening to our complaints, then we should take steps to afford him more opportunities to do so. However, we cannot force him to be reconciled, and at some point we must decide that there is no way for us to further encourage his seeking of reconciliation; we must simply allow him the opportunity, and hope that he comes around.

3. How did this moment impact you?

This impacts me by helping me recognize that I am the weaker link in my relationship with God, as well as emphasizing how I may also be the weaker link in my relationship with others, particularly when it comes to forgiveness and reconciliation. I must be open to others' perspectives to be reconciled with them if I have committed some sought of wrong doing. In addition, though, others must be open to being reconciled with me as well. I cannot force another to seek forgiveness if it's not in their heart. But if I truly want reconciliation, I must be willing to offer it openly, so that it is available to them in the case that they should decide they want to pursue it.

References

Balkin, R. S., Harris, N. A., Freeman, S. J., & Huntington, S. (2014). The forgiveness reconciliation inventory. Measurement and Evaluation in Counseling and Development ,  47(1), 3-13.  https://doi.org/10.1177/0748175613497037

Warmke, B. (2017). Divine forgiveness II: Reconciliation and debt-cancellation theories. Philosophy Compass ,  12(9), e12439.  https://doi.org/10.1111/phc3.12439