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Peer Review: due by 11:59 pm, Friday March 6

Instructions (read closely):

Step One:

Prepare a draft of your final paper and share with a peer in your section

Step Two:

Complete this document, providing detailed feedback for your partner.

Step Three:

Share this document with the person you reviewed. Via email is perhaps the best way to share your feedback

Step Four:

Save the document with your last name as the title of the document

Step Five:

Submit your completed form to GauchoSpace under the Peer Review Assignment

Once you have received your feedback, review the form with your writing. Did the reviewer capture your thesis statement correctly? Are your citations correct? Is your bibliography properly formatted? Are you being as specific as you can be with your paper? All of these are important while reviewing your paper as they are areas that will be graded.

Note from your TA’s:

Remember, someone is also reviewing your paper. If you would like thorough feedback, contribute to the cycle and provide strong and detailed feedback. Think critically about what could be improved, remember that your TA will be reading this and we are looking for critical thought and specificity

Name of Reviewer:Haoxiang Jia

Section time: W 1pm

Name of Reviewee: Qingrui He

Section time: W 1pm

Thesis statement (5 points)

Does the thesis statement include:

Threshold Concept

Media being analyzed

Clear argument

(x ) yes ( ) no

( x ) yes ( ) no

( x) yes ( ) no

What is the thesis statement? Copy and paste is below.

Using this threshold concept as a lens, we see marriage story as a commentary on how contemporary notions of marriage and divorce treat women and women differently, exemplifying the differences and double standards between the two.

What can make the thesis statement stronger?

Making the thesis stronger would include the different perspectives portrayed on gender constructs by society.

Sources (5 points)

Are there at least three sources cited in the paper?

(x ) yes ( ) no

What are the three sources (list them)

Baumbach, Noah. Marriage story. Netflix, 2019.

Launis, Christie and Holly, Hassel. Threshold concepts in women’s and gender studies: ways of seeing, thinking, and knowing, 2nd ed. Routledge; New York 2018. Print.

McIntosh, P. White priviledge: unpacking the invisible Knapsack. ‘white privilege and male privilege.’ Wellesley college center for research on women, Wessesley, 1989.

What journal are the sources from? Are they academic?

The journals are academic as they are peer reviewed and form part of the educational publications.

Are the sources paraphrased? How can they be better described? (Hint: arguments are stronger when you paraphrase sources instead of quote)

The journals are clearly and adequately paraphrased besides having direct quotes in the paper. This has enhanced arguments with support from evidence-based sources.

Incorporation of Class Materials (5 points)

Is the textbook cited and included in the paper?

The required textbook has been cited and used in the paper arguments.

What concepts or main ideas from the book are used?

The main concepts followed regarding the book focus on threshold concepts in women and gender studies. Through the concepts, we can view and understand the discrepancies between the female and male gender.

What concepts or main ideas do you think could make the paper stronger?

To make the paper stronger on arguments, the concepts should not only revolve around marriage and divorce scenes but could also include how the gender differences can be addressed to frame expectations on gendered behavior.

Are the terms used inaccurately?

From the review, the terms have been used accurately.

What do you suggest to make the paper stronger and more closely related to course concepts? (hint: look at your notes)

Making the paper stronger will involve a larger focus on gender thresholds from a social level as compared to the current paper which focuses on marriage and divorce.

Threshold Concepts - TC (5 points)

What threshold concept is used? Is it properly stated?

( x) Gender as a Social Construct

( ) Privilege and Oppression

( ) Intersectionality

( ) Feminist Praxis

Are there more than one TC being used? What TC do you think fits best?

Gender as a social construct has been effectively used and stated in the paper. Additionally, the paper has integrated male privilege and oppression in some parts. Gender as a social construct fits best for the paper in threshold concepts.

How is the TC used as a lens to analyze their media?

Analyzes of the media through gender as a construct has been utilized to show how identities and sexuality can impact marriage, work, parenting, and statements on divorce.

What specific examples from the media are used? How are they connected to the TC?

Quotes and references on the marriage story film have been used. This include comments given by the divorce lawyer on how society views divorce proceedings from a male and female perspective creating higher standards on the male gender. The examples are connected to the threshold in that social constructs are used in gender comparison and standard-setting.

Are there direct connections between the media and class concepts? How can these connections be made stronger?

In my opinion, the connections made between media and class concepts are strong enough for the paper. This is because the direct connections portray how the concepts are integrated in social and cultural structures impacting notions and behaviors on gender.

If the paper specific? Or does it remain generalized? (Papers should be extremely specific)

I perceive the paper to be specific. Focusing on the specific threshold and relations made to media utilized has enhanced the understanding of the concept and arguments made.

Grammar, Spelling, and Formatting (5 points)

Is the bibliography properly formatted (annotated bibliography not needed)?

( x ) yes ( ) no

Do spelling mistakes need to be addressed?

( ) yes ( x ) no

Is the paper double spaced?

( x ) yes ( ) no

Is there a cover page?

( x ) yes ( ) no

Is the paper 1500-1800 words?

( x ) yes ( ) no

Are there sentences that are confusing and need to be edited? Which are they?

I find the sentences coherent and well formulated to make connections in arguments throughout the paper. This simplifies the understanding of the paper with no confusion.