Need Writing Help
Law101
OutlinewithcommentsWeek5.pdf
HandfordOutline by Kimberley Handford
Submission date: 30-Apr-2023 09:16PM (UTC-0400) Submission ID: 2080282747 File name: 130602_Kimberley_Handford_HandfordOutline_6035521_977392310.docx (14.86K) Word count: 683 Character count: 4380
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Possessive
Possessive
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8% SIMILARITY INDEX
3% INTERNET SOURCES
6% PUBLICATIONS
8% STUDENT PAPERS
1 3%
2 2%
3 2%
Exclude quotes Off
Exclude bibliography Off
Exclude matches Off
HandfordOutline ORIGINALITY REPORT
PRIMARY SOURCES
Submitted to Georgetown University Student Paper
Submitted to Leiden University Student Paper
Submitted to CSU, Long Beach Student Paper
FINAL GRADE
84/100
HandfordOutline GRADEMARK REPORT
GENERAL COMMENTS
Instructor
Kimberley, thank you for submitting the Week 5 Ou tline. You included the required elements, includin g the use of four sources. Please review my comme nt markups within your document for information t o apply as you work on your rough draft essay. If y ou have any questions, feel free to email me. Than ks for your work on this! Professor Gonzalez
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Comment 1
You have some good information here, but remember that a thesis should be one very speci fic sentence in length. See if you can work on paring this down and condensing your argume nt into one sentence. It can be a lengthier sentence (just make sure you use punctuation app ropriately to avoid a run-on).
Comment 2
This sentence isn't entirely clear, mainly because you used "globalization" at the beginning a nd end of the sentence. It's as though you're trying to explain globalization by using the term globalization, which doesn't work. Please work on re-framing this idea so that it's a clearer, m ore specific claim that directly connects to your thesis argument.
Comment 3
Instead of referring to authors in the wrap-up areas, phrase these components in your own words (using your own ideas).
PAGE 2
Comment 4
This is basically a repeat of the above topic sentence. Some variation and/or greater explana tion would have been ideal here. Remember that the example sections could have been mor e detailed than just a source excerpt.
Comment 5
See my previous comments about the construction of the wrap-up sentences.
Comment 6
I recommend that you work on making this a more specific claim that directly ties to your the sis argument.
PAGE 3
Comment 7
This is a bit vague as well. I think that once you have refined your thesis argument it will be e asier for you to create more tightly focused, specific topic sentences. You will then want to en sure that all body content (within your research paper) is written to support your thesis argu ment.
Possessive Review the rules for possessive nouns.
Possessive Review the rules for possessive nouns.
PAGE 4
Comment 8
Since we are working remotely, please make sure you include a link for each resource. Here i s a helpful link pertaining to MLA citation development:
https://owl.purdue.edu/owl/research_and_citation/mla_style/mla_formatting_and_style_guid e/mla_works_cited_page_basic_format.html
RUBRIC: ENG101 OUTLINE RUBRIC
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