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Rethinking " Those Kids " : Lessons Learned from a Novice Teacher's Induction
into In/Exclusion
Article · November 2016
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Rethinking “Those Kids”: Lessons Learned from a Novice Teacher’s Induction into In/Exclusion Louis Olander
My Own Resistance to Inclusion
I was not always a believer in inclusion; in fact, I actively resisted it initially. It seemed far-fetched idealism
at best and injurious practice at worst. Much of this resistance came from misunderstandings about
inclusion that were driven by my own teacher preparation course work and by poorly implemented
quasi-inclusion structures in schools where I worked. Admittedly, my resistance usually materialized in
the teachers’ lounge as common grumbling and probably did not amount to much in terms of actual
action. Nevertheless, my somewhat passive-aggressive stance was generally motivated by retaining
control over my students, who were often derisively branded as those kids by general education teachers
and administrators. This was largely because I felt that I could help them more that way, as I probably
overestimated my own capacity to do good in their lives.
When I returned from a yearlong combat tour as a medic in Iraq in 2005, I struggled to make sense
of my diagnosis of post-traumatic stress disorder. I did not think the mold of a “disabled veteran” fit
me, and I resented the guys who I came home with who had reconstituted their identities around an
aggrandized sense of self-importance and sacrificial injuries. In a practical sense, though, I came to
discover that I had a poor grasp of my temper, something that would come to make my work teaching
unnecessarily difficult.
I came into teaching in 2007 through an alternative certification program in New York City and was
assigned to become a special education teacher. I was told that my medical experience would make me
a good fit for the position since I already possessed the mindframe to diagnose and treat illness. Per
the terms of my fellowship, I received subsidized tuition at a public university, and my graduate course
work followed a “clinical” model, emphasizing evidence-based practice. Inclusion was discussed solely
in terms of technical skills: collaboration, co-planning, differentiation, and classroom management. In
my teacher preparation program, reflection had one purpose—not to examine ways in which privilege
2 | Bank Street College of Education
of all sorts colored our perceptions of our kids and of schooling—only to evaluate the effectiveness
of implementation of didactic techniques. In no uncertain terms, my cohort of teacher candidates
was told that our sole mission was to make large measurable gains in student test scores; that was
why we were selected for the program. Like many others, I walked into a class in September woefully
underprepared and with my own biases unchecked.
Collaborative Team Teaching and Class 633
At the end of my summer crash course in high-impact teaching strategies for urban students, I secured
a placement position in a large middle school in central Brooklyn with some 1,500 students in grades
six through eight. I would later find out from a colleague that the principal had been reluctant to hire
me, fearful that my military service had rendered me mentally unstable. In some ways, perhaps some
of her concerns were well warranted; I had faced significant issues readjusting after returning home.
Nevertheless, it felt lousy to be labeled. I did not think of myself as unstable—just as a person who
sometimes experienced instability in certain contexts. At that point, I understood my own disability
medically, as a set of symptoms that were exacerbated by triggers in my environment. As long as I
could avoid those triggers, I thought, everything would be fine.
The first class that I taught had 38 sixth graders and was known by its number, 633. The class
employed the collaborative team teaching (CTT) model1 and had, by design, a ratio of 40% students
whose disabilities were documented in their individualized education programs (IEPs) to 60% general
education students. I was to collaboratively plan and deliver lessons in English, math, and social studies
with three different co-teachers who would rotate into the classroom where I stayed with the students
all day. Unlike most novice teachers, I was able to keep the class orderly and well behaved. However,
doing so required occasionally unleashing a rage from within me that felt good to neither me nor the
students. While my administration appreciated my ability to keep the kids in line, I felt like there was
much I was not being told about who they were and what they needed beyond being controlled.
Michael2 was a young, very dark-skinned 11-year-old boy from Jamaica who had an obvious speech
impairment and an irregular gait. Though his IEP stated that he had a learning disability, what I came
to know about him led me to believe that that label was either inaccurate, or, at best, incomplete—in
any event, the result of a poorly done evaluation of his educational needs. Not mentioned in his IEP
1 Collaborative team teaching was renamed integrated co-teaching in 2009, but the model remained the same. This paper describes events before the name change. 2 All names have been changed to pseudonyms to protect anonymity.
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at all was that he was in many respects a very strong student. He often made intelligent, insightful
comments in class, though they were difficult to understand because of his accent and a slur in his
speech.
Michael would come to my class during lunch, sneaking in from the playground, crying because he
was teased and called a “retard” by other students. His writing showed that he was not struggling
cognitively, but his handwriting made his insights tough to read. The occupational therapist and
I eventually unearthed his cumulative record file from a dusty cabinet and discovered that he was
born with hemiplegic cerebral palsy, not at all the learning disability his IEP indicated. His mother, a
hotel room cleaner who worked irregular hours, was baffled by the jargon and paperwork of special
education. She would say, “he was born this way,” but she did not know when or why he was labeled
as having a learning disability. The words “special education” were an insult to her. “He’s not a retard,”
she would say.
Kris was an incredibly intelligent, short Black 12-year-old boy with a fiery, mischievous smile. He was
placed into 633 because of his behavioral issues, which were reported to our middle school by his
elementary school. I remember the programmer telling me that she thought that it would help Kris to
have two teachers in the room. He was loud and rambunctious, but never malicious—he always tried
hard to make his friends laugh. At one point, I was trying to keep food out of the classroom (the room
was infested with roaches), and he brought a rubber sandwich to class and would pretend to sneak
bites. When I caught him with it, he threw it on the ground and it bounced up at me, eliciting laughter
from everyone, including my co-teachers and me. Later, when I had his parents in for a conference to
discuss his report card, they told me that they were afraid to let Kris play in the unsafe streets in their
neighborhood, as they were recent immigrants from Haiti. It was then that I realized that he was so
energetic in class because he did not have an outlet for his playfulness outside of school.
Kris did not have an IEP, but my mentor who was an older veteran special educator swore he should
be referred for an emotional disturbance label. Since she thought he belonged in a self-contained
class, the school’s administration requested that the parents sign a letter requesting a special education
evaluation. When I spoke to them about it, I quietly cautioned them against consenting for him to
be evaluated, sharing my worries about the possible consequences of him being classified. I thought
that his naughty behavior clearly seemed to me to be a function of his context, not of an intrinsic
“disturbance” within him. Mostly, I was worried about what would happen to him if he was put into a
system that he did not belong in—in my mind, very much like a patient taking someone else’s medicine,
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as I still saw special education as a para-medical field. Kris’s parents ultimately did not sign the pretyped
form letter requesting evaluation. In class, Kris also mellowed out quite a bit when I learned that the
best way to manage his behavior was to enjoy the humor in it and find outlets for his energy.
I first encountered Quamasia when I went to get a bookshelf from her general education class. She
was repeating sixth grade, having failed the tests for promotion, and was bigger and louder than all of
the other children. When I walked into the room, she turned her attention to me and began to catcall
me as I picked up the shelf and carried it out of the room. I contemplated yelling at her, but the crowd
was clearly hers, and her teacher was clearly unsuccessful in trying to rein her in. Three months into
the school year, in just enough time for a referral, IEP meeting, and placement, she was given an IEP
with a Learning Disability label and placed into 633. She regretted her earlier actions the second she
walked in and saw me, but I tried to be welcoming and forgiving. She sat quietly in class, ashamed of
being in “special ed.”
I came to understand that 633 was a big dumping ground for students who were unwanted, even
though it masqueraded as an inclusion setting. Michael, Kris, and Quamasia were just three of those
kids, joined by 35 other students with significant learning needs who were excluded from general
education classrooms because of disability, academic struggles, or behavior management needs. 633
was not diverse at all; in fact, it was a somewhat homogeneous group of struggling learners. In my
mind at the time, whatever benefits there were of educating students with disabilities alongside their
nondisabled peers, they were far outweighed by the challenges associated with having so many needs
in one place. Moreover, whatever advantages came with having two teachers in a class were outweighed
by the demands of not having time or resources to plan collaboratively. While I personally got along
with my co-teachers, they were weak classroom managers, which put me in the position of perennial
disciplinarian.
That was how I came to misunderstand inclusion. It did not make sense to me to lump all students with
significant—and often conflicting—learning needs together in one place. I became the disciplinarian,
and my co-teachers delivered content in an endless “one-teach, one-assist” arrangement. Nevertheless,
there were a few successful aspects of this arrangement. I was able to work closely with students,
building relationships with them and their parents; I believe I got to know the students of 633 better
than any other group I encountered over the course of my career. I still keep in touch with Quamasia
and Kris, almost 10 years later. Additionally, the arrangement was successful in the sense that it met
the administration’s most immediate demands: I was able to control 38 of the school’s most disruptive
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students at one time. When I got sick, though, I would have the security guards in the building tell me
that I was not allowed to take days off, as my students literally could not even be kept in the classroom
when I was not there. I felt that I could do better on my own.
At the end of my second year of teaching the group, I wrote my master’s degree thesis, which ended up
being an indictment of CTT and, by association, of inclusion. It seemed that the promise of inclusive
methodologies was entirely undermined by poor implementation of the critical features that would
enable inclusion to be successful: purposeful pairing of co-teachers, time for co-planning, thoughtful
selection of the general education students who would be in the class, and most significantly, a shared
and clearly articulated vision of what inclusion should actually look like. As my wife and I moved to
a new home across the city, I needed to find a new job. One of my main criteria was that I would not
have to work in a CTT setting. I ended up finding a school that did not have an inclusion program to
speak of. However, that school would prove to be an even bigger problem for me.
Convenient Segregation and the Self-Contained Model
Through a friend of a friend, I easily got an interview at a small high school with 300 students in the
Bronx. The school consistently scored at the highest levels on both New York State and New York
City accountability measures, based on its high pass rates for standardized exams.3 When I interviewed
there, I was told that they did not have any CTT programs and that students with disabilities were
mostly placed in a self-contained setting made up of one teacher, one paraprofessional, and 15
students identified as having “moderate to severe” disabilities. A small number of other students with
IEPs received special education teacher support services (SETSS) in their general education classes,
probably because those students approximated what the school considered to be normal. I strongly
preferred self-contained settings, as I enjoyed working by myself: there were no conflicts with another
teacher regarding classroom management style, no need to find time to plan how to collaborate, and
most crucially, a much smaller class size.
I was assigned to work with a tenth-grade class, teaching algebra, global history, and foreign languages—
one semester of French, one of Japanese. I was told that there would be opportunities for me to take
on a leadership role as well, even though I was only in my third year of teaching. I was also told that
the students were a bit wild and needed a teacher with strong classroom management skills to keep the
3 It is worth noting that while many students passed the exams, very few scored very high. Accountability metrics at that time tracked only pass rates, not overall scores.
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class in control. The administration was seemingly happy to hire a male with a military background to
that end.
What I was not told was that during the previous year, the students’ behavior had led their ninth-grade
teacher to quit after a few months and driven the long-term substitute to have an emotional breakdown;
she was, stories said, taken away from the school in an ambulance. This created the opening of the
position I was hired for. Given their past successes at disruption, this group of kids was emboldened to
resist my control and was in truth difficult to manage. The administration also added an English class
to my teaching load and appointed me as the transition coordinator. My supervisor, Ms. Santana, was
a brand new assistant principal. She was charged with managing everything related to special education
and oversaw all aspects of my work, most notably lesson planning and writing IEPs.
My class had its share of students who displayed distinctly troubling behaviors, but there were also a
few who were curious and eager to comply. Emily was a 15-year-old Black girl with an obvious physical
disability. She was overweight, walked with a limp, and had one immobile eye. Additionally, she wore
long sleeves and pants to cover up a skin condition, even in hot weather. Yet, she, too, was labeled as
having a learning disability. She was a dream to teach: she was curious, funny, and very supportive of
her peers’ academic and social needs. In many ways, she acted as the mother of the class. At Emily’s
IEP meeting, there was the suggestion of moving her to a general education class and providing her
with SETSS there. However, she did not want to do that. “As bad as things are here,” she said, “those
teachers don’t have the time to take care of the students who need help. I’d rather be in here.”
Barry was a 15-year-old Black boy of unremarkable height and build who had a perpetual smile on his
face and seemed kind. He was classified as having a learning disability, but the scores that the school
psychologist computed for him qualified him for a Mental Retardation label.4 He was unable to read
or write independently, but he liked sitting with his friend Juan, a thin, light-skinned boy, born in the
Dominican Republic. Juan often associated with the few notorious gang members in the school and
was frequently involved in fights in and outside of school.
Barry increasingly became a pawn in the scheming of Juan and his associates, taking orders from him
to pick fights with suspected members of rival gangs and destroy school property, so Santana decided
that it was time for Barry to transfer to a more restrictive setting. Once a placement was secured for
4 The disability category “mental retardation” was renamed “intellectual disability” in 2010 by PL 111-256, also known as “Rosa’s Law.” At the time of this story, the term mental retardation was still in use.
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Barry in a special school—which was in a more distant neighborhood that was not easily accessible by
public transportation from his house—it was put on me to convince his grandmother to approve the
move. When the grandmother resisted by not showing up at several arranged meetings, Santana and
her secretary began to phone her every day, until she eventually signed the papers.
Santana and I also began to bump heads. It started on Veteran’s Day, when others were thanking me
for my service—a popular expression of gratitude that I, like many other veterans, neither enjoy nor
welcome (Richtel, 2015). She told me that I was culpable for the deaths of innocent civilians just
because I had participated in the war. I did not control my reaction to her suggestion well, barking
aggressively back at her in front of a few other teachers in the department. From that point on,
she targeted me with unannounced observations, gave me poor ratings, and directly threatened my
career. I struggled to keep my composure, often drinking too much at the bar after school hours, and
my teaching and professionalism distinctly suffered. I was unable to keep up with a workload that
was probably unmanageable in the first place. My teaching performance deteriorated and I failed to
complete paperwork on time, which made Santana even angrier with me. One of my colleagues told
me she encouraged two ninth-grade boys to fill up paper bags with air and pop them behind me,
causing me to startle. I felt more disabled during that year than at any other point since coming home.
I complained to Principal Bullock about Santana, but he did not want to interfere. “I just want you
guys to work together and deal with those kids, so I can worry about the ones who are going to college,”
he said. He pointed at his bookshelf, full of Department of Education manuals, saying that he had
his plate full. Driven by accountability measures calculated from test scores, Bullock explained that his
vision was to create a true prep school that would send poor Bronx kids to his own Ivy League alma
mater; it was clear that my students were not part of his vision. In fact, I do not believe that he even
expected my students to graduate. On the contrary, I think the school was required to take a number
of students with disabilities and just needed a place to store them. Receiving no support from him at
the end of the year, I found work teaching elsewhere.
With Bullock and Santana at the helm, the school was successful in achieving its goals: to segregate
those kids so that they were out of the way of students who were deemed to be more capable. As a
result, the standardized test score pass rates for the school flourished, and at one point the school
was ranked among the top ten highest-achieving schools in the city. Yet, few students with IEPs ever
graduated from the school, and when they did it was because their parents fought for them to transfer
to alternative programs wherein special education did not exist.
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In 2012, Mayor Bloomberg initiated special education reforms that were targeted at placing students
with disabilities in less restrictive environments (Wheaton, 2011). On the face of it, this would seem
to be a systematic move toward inclusion. However, if we conceive of inclusion as a “principle of
practice” (Kozleski, Yu, Satter, Francis, & Haines, 2015) instead of as a concrete set of implementable
models, it is tough to maintain such an optimistic stance toward those reforms; in reality, the result was
that decisions about the placement of students with disabilities were entirely in the hands of education
professionals whose primary concerns were compliance and accountability, not accommodating
student needs. Moreover, many parents and educators understood that the impetus for this reform
was to cut costs (Wheaton, 2011). Indeed, the common practice of hiring alternatively certified special
education teachers at the bottom of collectively negotiated pay scales is probably similarly driven by
the desire to lower the cost of staffing fields with high turnover.
Systematic Exclusion
Connor and Ferri (2007) described how special education settings are used as a way to keep the peace
through removing students that overextended educators fear to be disorderly or disruptive. There is
little doubt that both of my former schools employed this rationale for exclusion, and that it enabled
them to achieve their desired ends. Thus, in these schools, “special education literally [became] a way
to ‘keep the peace’ by removing students who might disrupt the status quo of the general education
classroom” (Connor & Ferri, 2007, p. 69). In this sense, Hockenbury, Kauffman, and Hallahan’s
(2000) claim that special education is “already in most aspects well enough integrated as a sub-system”
(p. 5) seems analogous to arguments made in the late-19th and early-20th century for “separate but
equal” racial segregation. Some may consider the comparison to be a bit hyperbolic; however, Ferri
and Connor (2005) have convincingly demonstrated how the special education apparatus has in fact
contributed to resegregation since the Supreme Court’s decision in Brown v. Board of Education in
1954. Moreover, I seriously doubt that any of my former students would agree that they were “well
enough integrated” into the fabric of school life.
Furthermore, when Mayor Bloomberg and his education chancellors instituted changes in compliance
with the federal No Child Left Behind Act (NCLB), what Danforth (2014) called “technocracy”
became the lingua franca of the entire New York City school system, including its separate and unequal
special education sub-system. Under this technocratic regime
The complexities, vagaries, and inconsistencies of everyday life are distilled into fields of
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metric regularity and schemes of statistical determination. In this view, technocracy is a mental
state, a way of thinking about, organizing, and interpreting the world that yields mechanized
symmetry, predictability, and efficiency. What most teachers would describe in terms of human
interaction and relationships is recast as a series of calculus problems. (Danforth, 2014, pp.
313–314)
There can be little doubt that this quantification of students drove Principal Bullock’s triage of my
students into the hands of the abusive and inexperienced Assistant Principal Santana and her similarly
inexperienced staff (myself included). In his quest to improve the statistical measures of student
learning, Bullock saw to it that those whose performance would not yield the desired results were
marginalized by technocratic management. It would be nice to believe that this was an isolated case
(and perhaps the more extreme aspects of it were), but I would contend that the proliferation of
technocracy is likely to be a general feature of post-NCLB American education and underlie the
marginalization of students with disabilities in a range of settings.
Tied to this phenomenon is the proliferation of so-called evidence-based practices, or instructional
methods that purport to be scientifically validated. Gallagher (2010) convincingly argued that through
dubious applications of statistical research methods in education, this paradigm contributes to the
further marginalization of students who are already conceived of as being “abnormal.” All of this
helps create a broad system of exclusion, which Slee (2011) describes as “scraps from the table for
children who, when all is said and done, are sometimes tolerated but never welcome” (p. 43). This
would surely resonate with my former students, as it resonates with me and my experiences.
My own Paradigm Shift – Inclusion as Social Justice
My understanding of inclusion has changed from a fundamentally technical definition to a much broader
and abstract understanding. Critical to this has been a shift from accepting a primarily legal definition
and rationale for inclusion, such as compliance with the least restrictive environment requirements of
the Individuals with Disabilities Education Act, to a moral and ethical rationale based on the civil rights
of children with disabilities to not be segregated. The work of disability studies in education (DSE)
scholars, especially David Connor, has been crucial in changing my perspective in this way. I first met
Dr. Connor when I was seeking admission into my current doctoral program, and I remember him
explaining DSE as an alternative to the field of special education. I was confused at first, I must admit,
because I had never heard the professional, medical, and legal underpinnings of special education
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questioned. I now realize, having worked with and learned from him, that desegregation of special
education is not just a matter of compliance with the mandate of implementing accommodations
“to the maximum extent possible” or even “with all deliberate speed”; it is a moral imperative to
destigmatize disability in our schools.
Broadly, inclusion has been conceived as a way of meeting the learning needs of students with
disabilities alongside their non-disabled peers and as a way of meeting the needs of all students by
focusing pedagogical energies on the most marginalized students, with varying degrees of emphasis
on disability-specific issues (Kiuppis & Hausstätter, 2015). For my purposes, the distinctions between
groups for whom inclusion is done do not matter very much; on the contrary, I think inclusion can be
best understood in opposition to the systematic “scraps from the table” exclusion that I witnessed and
experienced as a teacher.
To this end, teacher education in inclusive practices must be grounded in a commitment to equity and
acceptance of diversity first. This needs to be articulated in a vision for inclusivity that goes beyond
technocratic notions of achievement; indeed, what I had missed in my training was the “why” of
inclusion. Without that context, it was much easier for me and for those around me to accept the
convenience of segregation. Much can and should be learned from teacher education programs that
emphasize inclusive practice, notably at Syracuse University (Ashby, 2012). In my work as a teacher
educator, I teach many of the very same technical foundations of inclusive practice that I once was
taught: collaborative co-teaching, differentiation, assessment, and classroom management. However,
though I finished my initial teacher training, my understanding was that those technical skills were to
be used specifically to teach students with disabilities or perhaps could be stretched into benefitting
“at risk” students; now I focus on framing those technical skills in a context of equity and civil
rights for individuals with disabilities. Moreover, I seek to teach a more comprehensive but abstract
concept of inclusion in order to convey that those skills need to benefit all students, from those who
are profoundly disadvantaged by prevailing pedagogical models to those who are already the most
successful in general education settings. Finally, by drawing attention to questions of who has access to
those so-called inclusion spaces, I ask my students to be critical about whether the structures that they
see in their fieldwork or in their schools are truly inclusive.
In addition to reframing inclusionary practices as pedagogy for equity, new models for inclusion need
to come into practice, particularly in urban school districts, wherein disability, race, and socioeconomic
status overlap profoundly. Slee’s (2011) claim that theories of inclusive education are too often technical
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prescriptions noted, there remains a need for practical suggestions for that can be put into practice,
given the frequent inadequacy of existing structures in these places. This problem is particularly
acute for secondary schools, as many models for inclusive practice are based on early childhood and
elementary settings (Beckman & Odom, 2002; Cross, Traub, Hutter-Pishgahi, & Shelton, 2004). In
the broader context of inclusive education, the design of structures for inclusive practice requires
some capacity for local flexibility in finding ways to address the non-negotiables, including meaningful
collaboration, accommodation for student needs, and purposeful assessment, given the real world-
fiscal and personnel problems that urban school districts face.
Finally, I am finding that working toward inclusion means coming to terms with my own disability.
I understand my own disability and relationship with society differently now. My years of teaching
changed my awareness of segregation and disability in profound ways, not least of all because the way
that I was treated when my disability came to light and paralleled how the students I worked with were
treated. For me, my “symptoms” are connected not merely to “triggers” in a direct causal relationship
but also, in complex and dynamic ways, to the broad contexts in which I work and live in complex and
intersecting ways. My awareness of how my own medical condition turned into something that was
genuinely disabling also emerged. The ecological factors that I experienced that affected the expression
of my own difference separated me from my peers, in much the same way that ecological factors
affect the academic and behavioral performance of students with perceived disabilities in segregated
classrooms. Michael, Kris, Quamasia, Emilie, Juan, and Barry’s exclusion therefore should never be
justified on the grounds that they were less “able” than others. Rather, their disabilities need to be
viewed in the context of an exclusionary system that makes whatever unique characteristics that were
intrinsic to them truly disabling.
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References
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Beckman, P. J., & Odom, S. L. (2002). Widening the circle: Including children with disabilities
in preschool programs (Vol. 83). New York, NY: Teachers College Press.
Connor, D. J., & Ferri, B. A. (2007). The conflict within: Resistance to inclusion and other
paradoxes in special education. Disability & Society, 22(1), 63–77.
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NY: Peter Lang.
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Kozleski, E. B., Yu, T., Satter, A. L., Francis, G. L., & Haines, S. J. (2015). A never ending journey:
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for Persons with Severe Disabilities, 40(3), 211–226.
Richtel, M. (2015, February 21). Please don’t thank me for my service. The New York Times.
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me-for-my-service.html
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of-special-ed-reform
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Louis Olander is a doctoral student in the Urban Education program at the
City University of New York (CUNY) Graduate Center, and teaches graduate
and undergraduate students about inclusive education in the Special Educa-
tion department at Hunter College. His research interests are universal design,
appreciative inquiry, and decolonizing educational research. Olander previous-
ly taught special education in New York City. He lives in Yonkers with his wife
and two kids.
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