Early childhood special Education

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Families and Disabilities

  • Having a child with a disability usually requires an adjustment for the parents, siblings, other family members, and for the family relationships as well.
  • Remember that all parents assume that their children will be born and grow up without any problems.
  • Therefore, when issues arise, there is usually a process parents must go through before they can accept their situation.

Families and Disabilities

  • Obviously, how parents adapt to their child’s disability varies.
  • Some parents accept quickly, others are in denial for the child’s entire childhood (or longer!)
  • The process that many parents go through, however, tends to be: shock, denial, sadness, anxiety, anger, and adaptation.
  • Sometimes parents go through some of these stages and not others.
  • It is a helpful model for professionals, however, to better understand why all parents do not react the same.

Families and Disabilities

  • Many factors play a role in how families adapt to having a child with a disability in the family.
  • Culture, family values, and religion all play a role.
  • In addition, parents’ own characteristics play a role: flexibility, coping skills, relationships with others (do they have a support system?), mental stability, a general optimistic or pessimistic outlook, and level of effective parenting skills.

Families and Disabilities

  • Therefore, if a parent comes to talk to you about their child, who has been newly diagnosed with a disability, finding out about these other factors may assist you, as the teacher, the child, and the family, in better dealing with this situation.

Families and Disabilities

  • We do know that families with a child who has disabilities have more stress than other families.
  • This stress comes from many factors: financial, social, guilt, time, interventions, and/or severity of the disability.
  • Let’s look at each of these stress areas.

Families and Disabilities

  • Financial Factors:
  • If parents choose to pay for services themselves, this can be quite costly.
  • Disagreements with insurance companies and school systems for payment for interventions.
  • Insurance can be limited or used up for the child and possibly the family, depending on the insurance.
  • Extra costs: babysitting, tutors, or special materials can cost the family much money.
  • Money may be spent on the child with a disability that would have gone to other family members or activities (vacations, college funds, retirement, etc,)

Families and Disabilities

  • Social Factors:
  • Do they have a support system?
  • How do others (extended family, neighborhood, strangers) react to the family and the child?
  • How does the culture(s) of the family respond to the child and disabilities in general?
  • Does the family isolate themselves or do they do regular family activities and outings?

Families and Disabilities

  • Guilt Factors:
  • If the family is a two parent family, do the husband and wife have time for each other?
  • Do the parents have enough time for their other children?
  • Sometimes parents feel that they are taking away from their other children to meet the needs of their child with challenges.
  • Parents fear that something they did caused the disability.

Families and Disabilities

  • Time Factors:
  • Do parents have enough time for themselves and their other children?
  • They may feel guilty they don’t spend enough time with their child with a disability, esp. if they are in a residential school or have caretakers, or they may feel that the other children in the family do not get an equal (or enough) attention.

Families and Disabilities

  • Intervention Factors:
  • These may be very time consuming or financially expensive.
  • It may mean that there are people who are not part of the family who are often in the home or who may live there (baby sitters, nurses, caretakers, aides, tutors, etc.)
  • Parents may spend a lot of time and money investigating interventions.

Families and Disabilities

  • Severity of the Disability Factors:
  • The more severe the disability, the more stressful it may be on the family.
  • However, don’t discount mild disabilities. These may be stressful, also, since parents may always have to fight for interventions for their child or deal with outsiders who do not understand their actions (not understanding the child has challenges).

Families and Disabilities

  • Research has shown that families who adjust positively to having a child with disabilities, become better parents, are more tolerant of differences, have closer family ties, and are more concerned about social issues and spirituality.
  • Many parents of children with challenges feel that they have become enriched and blessed to have the child they have because the child with challenges has been such a positive influence on them and their family.

Families and Disabilities

  • Siblings are also impacted by having a sibling with a disability.
  • In general, parents set the stage for how the rest of the family relates to the child with disabilities.
  • Siblings, esp. young siblings, may not fully understand the uniqueness of their sibling with challenges until they reach adolescence.
  • This is because children tend to be ego-centric and they view their life situation as normal, having not had much exposure to other situations.

Families and Disabilities

  • Siblings, of all ages, however, are aware of the needs of their sibling with challenges, and can resent that at different stages of their development.
  • Siblings, like parents, may have a range of adjustment issues, and some siblings will adjust much easier than others.
  • Siblings have stress related to the situation of having a sibling with a disability, just as parents do.

Families and Disabilities

  • Families may rely on the school system to provide support, information, and advise on dealing with their child with disabilities.
  • As a teacher, you can provide the following to parents and families:
  • Information relating to their child’s learning and skills
  • Information on resources, support groups, etc.
  • Clear and specific information on the disability and their child’s learning.
  • Listen when needed.
  • Answer questions as best as you can. Don’t be afraid to say you don’t know, but find out where you can direct their questions.

Families and Disabilities

  • Ask parents questions about the child in other settings. Ask their opinions about strategies, interventions, or their child’s response to certain situations.
  • Use the parents as a resource to help you better assist their child.
  • View parents as partners in their child’s learning.
  • However, be sure you are only giving advise as a teacher! You are not a medical professional or therapist, so be careful to only give information that is in your area of expertise (teaching and learning) and be sure to provide resources (people or other types) to the parents in these other areas where you are not the expert.
  • Developed and written by Teresa L. Bridger, Ph.D.