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IsMeetingOnlineGoodforMarriages__PsychologyToday.pdf
6/17/2021 Is Meeting Online Good for Marriages? | Psychology Today
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Liesel Sharabi Ph.D. Dating in the Digital Age
Is Meeting Online Good for Marriages? Findings from one study suggest meeting online may
benefit couples in marriage.
Posted December 27, 2017
Source: View Apart/Shutterstock
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The internet has become a common place to meet a romantic
partner — so common, in fact, that the Pew Research Center
estimates that nearly one in six Americans has dated online or
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via a mobile device. As more and more people are finding love
online, it’s worth considering how the technology that brought
them together might affect the course of their marital
relationships. Yet, until recently, little was known about how
couples who met online fared in marriage — or whether they
were any better or worse off than those who followed a more
traditional path to the altar.
In a study published in PNAS, researchers surveyed 19,131
Americans about the quality and stability of their marriages,
which began sometime between 2005 and 2012. Their study
revealed two main findings about the marital outcomes of
couples who met on and offline.
First, the Internet really has changed where people are finding a
spouse. Approximately one in three of the survey’s respondents
were married to someone they met online, with the most
commonly reported venues being online dating (45.01 percent),
social networking (20.87 percent), and chat rooms (9.51 percent).
Meanwhile, the most popular places for meeting a spouse offline
were through traditional channels like work (21.66 percent),
friends (19.06 percent), and school (10.97 percent). Even now, it
seems that the majority of marriages still get their start offline —
but there are also plenty of couples who are getting married
after meeting in different spaces across the Internet.
Second, where a couple meets may continue to matter even
after they marry. Participants who met their spouse online
reported that they were, on average, slightly more satisfied with
their marriages, and slightly less likely to separate or divorce
than those who met in offline venues. And although these
differences were small, they’re nevertheless a compelling
example of the Internet’s potential to benefit relationships even
after they move offline.
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References
Amato, P. R. (2010). Research on divorce: Continuing trends and new
developments. Journal of Marriage and Family, 72, 650-666. doi:
10.1111/j.1741-3737.2010.00723.x
Cacioppo, J. T., Cacioppo, S., Gonzaga, G. C., Ogburn, E. L., & Vander‐
Weele, T. J. (2013). Marital satisfaction and break-ups differ across on-
line and off-line meeting venues. Proceedings of the National Academy
of Sciences, 110, 10135-10140. doi: 10.1073/pnas.1222447110
Livingston, G., & Caumont, A. (2017). 5 Facts on Love and Marriage in
America. Washington, DC: Pew Research Center. Retrieved from
http://www.pewresearch.org/fact-tank/2017/02/13/5-facts-about-love-
and-…
What’s so special about meeting online, and why would it have
any effect on marriage?
The study’s authors propose a number of possible explanations
for these findings. It could be that people profit from the
algorithms that some dating sites use to match them, the amount
of choice that comes from having access to a larger dating pool,
or the deep disclosures that often characterize online
relationships. They also emphasize that, of course, there’s more
to divorce than where a couple meets. An abundance of
research indicates that divorce is predicted by a complex
interplay of economic, demographic, and interpersonal factors,
such as a person’s age at first marriage, approach to conflict,
and even his or her parents’ marital history. But that isn’t to say
that these results aren’t significant — to the contrary. As the
authors write, “These data suggest that the Internet may be
altering the dynamics and outcomes of marriage itself.”
And that’s an exciting prospect, indeed.
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About the Author
Liesel Sharabi, Ph.D., is a social scientist at Arizona State University whose work explores the role of
technology in modern dating and relationships.
Online: Relationships & Technology Lab, Twitter
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