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The proverbs listed below reflect traditional wisdom for resolving conflicts. These can be thought of as descriptions of some of the different strategies for resolving conflicts. Read each of the proverbs carefully. Using the scale given below, indicate how typical each proverb is of your actions in a conflict.

5 = Very typical of the way I act in a conflict

4 = Frequently typical of the way I act in a conflict

3 = Sometimes typical of the way I act in a conflict

2 = Seldom typical of the way I act in a conflict

1 = Never typical of the way I act in a conflict

_____ 1. It is easier to refrain than retreat from a quarrel.

_____ 2. If you cannot make a person think as you do, make him or her do as you think.

_____ 3. Soft words win hearts.

_____ 4. You scratch my back, I’ll scratch yours.

_____ 5. Come now and let us reason together.

_____ 6. When two quarrel, the person who keeps silent is the most praiseworthy.

_____ 7. Might overcomes right.

_____ 8. Smooth words make smooth ways.

_____ 9. Better half a loaf than no bread at all.

_____ 10. Truth lies in knowledge, not in majority opinion.

_____ 11. He who fights and runs away lives to fight another day.

_____ 12. He hath conquered well that hath made his enemies flee.

_____ 13. Kill your enemies with kindness.

_____ 14. A fair exchange brings no quarrel.

_____ 15. No person has the final answer but every person has a piece to contribute.

_____ 16. Stay away from people who disagree with you.

_____ 17. Fields are won by those who believe in winning.

_____ 18. Kind words are worth much and cost little.

_____ 19. Tit for tat is fair play.

_____ 20. Only the person who is willing to give up his or her monopoly on truth can ever profit from the truths that others hold.

_____ 21. Avoid quarrelsome people as they will only make your life miserable.

_____ 22. A person who will not flee will make others flee.

_____ 23. Soft words ensure harmony.

_____ 24. One gift for another makes good friends.

_____ 25. Bring your conflicts into the open and face them directly; only then will the best solution ever be

discovered.

_____ 26. The best way of handling conflicts is to avoid them.

_____ 27. Put your foot down where you mean to stand.

_____ 28. Gentleness will triumph over anger.

_____ 29. Getting part of what you want is better than not getting anything at all.

_____ 30. Frankness, honesty, and trust will move mountains.

_____ 31. There is nothing so important that you have to fight for it.

_____ 32. There are two kinds of people in the world, the winners and the losers.

_____ 33. When one hits you with a stone, hit him or her with a piece of cotton.

_____ 34. When both people give in halfway, a fair settlement is achieved.

_____ 35. By digging and digging, the truth is discovered.

Scoring

Add up your scores on the following questions.

Avoiding Competing Obliging Compromising Integrating

(the Turtle) (the Shark) (the Teddy Bear) (the Fox) (the Owl)

Avoiding Competing/ Obliging/ Compromising Integrating/ Dominating Accommodate Collaborating

____ 1. _____ 2. _____ 3. _____ 4. _____ 5.

_____ 6. _____ 7. _____ 8. _____ 9. _____ 10.

_____ 11. _____ 12. _____ 13. _____ 14. _____ 15.

_____ 16. _____ 17. _____ 18. _____ 19. _____ 20.

_____ 21. _____ 22. _____ 23. _____ 24. _____ 25.

_____ 26. _____ 27. _____ 28. _____ 29. _____ 30.

_____ 31. _____ 32. _____ 33. _____ 34. _____ 35.

_____ Total _____ Total _____ Total _____ Total _____ Total