Assignment

1

TIGIST SHIFERAW

COMPOSITION II

FEBRURAY,10,2022

Climate change is among the greatest health threat facing humanity as well as health professional worldwide are already dealing with the health harms which are as a result of the unfolding issues. Climate change is already affecting health in a number of ways which may include death and sicknesses from the extreme weather events for instance heat waves, storms as well as floods, the disruption of food systems, maximizes in zoo noses and food, water as well as vector borne illnesses as well as mental health conditions. In addition climate change tends to undermine majority of the social determinants for good health such as livelihoods, equality as well as access to healthcare and social support structures. Comment by Eric R Wellington: Thanks for the draft. I hope you find my comments helpful. As you start consider adding evidence to back up what climate is doing to the world. References and evidence are the key. Comment by Eric R Wellington: comma Comment by Eric R Wellington: a fine thesis.

The climate based health risks are inappropriately felt by majority of the vulnerable as well as disadvantaged which may include women, kids, ethnic minorities, poor communities, migrants as well as displace individuals, older people as well as those who have underlying health challenges. Extreme weather events for instance floods, storms and heat waves which are as a result of climate change impacts the environmental as well as social determinants of health which lead to water, food as well as vector borne sicknesses, disrupted food systems as well as mental health problems. Thus climate change is a major health threat facing humanity today. Comment by Eric R Wellington: Why is this the case. Have evidence to illustrate this clearly. Comment by Eric R Wellington: Again you need evidence to back this up. Comment by Eric R Wellington: comma

Social Determinant of Health Comment by Eric R Wellington: Try to avoid headings, as your transitions and writing should clearly indicate where you are in the paper.

Since climate change is now identified as a public health issue, it is now hard to separate it from the list of determinants which worsen the social determinants of health. These are the social events in which people are born, grow, live, work as well as play, highly impact people’s health as well as drive health disparities. In regard to the social determinants of health, climate change can impact people’s good health such as livelihood. The maximized frequency as well as intensity of extreme weather events such as hurricanes, wildfires and droughts threatens the lives in the front line communities, thus riving persons from their homes and destroying their source of food as well as livelihoods (Ragavan, Marcil, & Garg, 2020). This maximizes the rate of hunger and poverty in this place. Majority of the persons that live in poverty depend on agriculture as well as natural resources to survive. For these people, the impacts of climate change which include shifting weather, limited water resources and maximized competition for resources tend to be a matter of life and death. Climate change has changed their lives into an unreliable game of guessing. Comment by Eric R Wellington: Who has identified this? You need support and evidence. Comment by Eric R Wellington: Not sure how social events are connect with climate change? Comment by Eric R Wellington: Good to have evidence to back thing ups, but this is your first citations. This does not provide specific data on the subject. Comment by Eric R Wellington: Don’t we all rely on this to survive? Comment by Eric R Wellington: It is not clear why some are treated did differently in terms of climate change.

Climate change maximizes the existing health and social inequities. Climate change tends to worsen the environmental conditions which include ozone pollution related to chronic sicknesses as well as injury and leads to social and economic dislocations which mostly affect the disadvantaged communities. The effects of climate change on health are mainly based on individual as well as community vulnerability as well as resilience. The main components of climate vulnerability are the pre-existing health status as well as living conditions. In the United States, these aspects are based on the forces that cannot be controlled by any person (Mocuta, 2017). They tend to differ in regard to place, race as well as income due to factors which may include inequities in the distribution of money and power, historical disinvestment in a number of communities, discriminatory activities as well as policies with time, high pollution burdens as well as inappropriate access to resources of health. Due to this the low income communities and people of color are inappropriately impacted by the health effects of climate change. Comment by Eric R Wellington: Where is the evidence and data to support this. Comment by Eric R Wellington: Who is defining this.? Comment by Eric R Wellington: Again you need much more specific data on how climate changes effects different people differently.

Climate change may as well cause limited access to health care to some people. Extreme weather events can disrupt infrastructure which may include utilities, transportation as well as communication systems, critical to maintaining access to emergency services as well as health care. Hospital supply chain can as well be disrupted thus resulting to shortage of essential pharmaceutical as well as medical appliances. Additionally people’s physical health and changes in the surrounding environment can impact their mental health. Extreme weather events may impact mental health mainly in cases of loss of life as well as home, images of extreme weather events in the media, as well as disruption of communication lines as well as social support networks which people with mental sickness require in order to be healthy (Hayes, et al., 2018). Comment by Eric R Wellington: This certainly makes sense. As weather effects transportation when it is severe. I would then look to see the increase of events that can cause this. How much of a increase over time . How many more of these events have happened in the last 10 years for example. Comment by Eric R Wellington: Very true. Comment by Eric R Wellington: Remove heading. Comment by Eric R Wellington: How much of an increase is there!

Environmental Determinant of Health

Climate change tends to highly impact the environmental determinants of health. These are external agents which may include biological, chemical, physical, social as well as culture which be causally linked to a change in health status. These can be termed as environmental influences which tend to be involuntary. First, just like any other aspect on earth, the lakes, rivers, streams, oceans and the water cycle are highly impacted by climate change thus leading to unsafe drinking water. As the air gets warmed up, it causes warmer waters, heavier rainfalls in some areas and droughts in others thus resulting to harmful cycle. Comment by Eric R Wellington: You need to provide support and data for all of this.

Climate change leads to heavy intense downpours, droughts as well rising water temperatures. This tends to interfere with the quality of drinking as well as recreational water. Bacterial and viruses thrive in this condition and when they are consumed by people tend to lead to various sicknesses. Contamination of drinking water by bacteria, viruses and protozoa can lead to outbreak of sicknesses for instance diarrheal sicknesses legionella, campylobacter as well as cholera. Some parts of the world experience differing patterns of flooding as well as drought. Drought can minimize the earth’s capacity to absorb the water. When precipitation takes place as more intense storms or as hurricanes which can lead to flooding as well as later the quality of water. Comment by Eric R Wellington: There is no evidence provided to support this. When and where has this happened, what data is there to support for these statements.

In regard to hunger ad undernourished persons, climate change tends to be a major threat. Extreme weather based disasters have minimized the production of major crops and lead to maximized cost of food as well as reduction in income. The disasters have inappropriately impacted the low income persons as well as their access to food which is the reason why they majored on the relationship between climate change and food security. More than 70% of the globe’s population gets majority of the daily nutrients from plants and climate change is already leading to droughts as well as flooding which can alter with the staple food crops. If the extra carbon dioxide in the air makes crops less healthy, it tends to be hard to feed the globe’s growing population. Climate change puts at risk the food supplies of individual in developing and the developed countries. Floods, droughts, more intense hurricanes, heat waves as well as wildfire can reduce the crop yields, destroy animals and disrupt the transportation of food. The increase in carbon dioxide levels from human activity can result to less nutritious crop yields. Comment by Eric R Wellington: Data to support this? Comment by Eric R Wellington: How do you know this? Where is the data? Comment by Eric R Wellington: Evidence? Comment by Eric R Wellington: Comment by Eric R Wellington: this is all repeated form before.

Changes in climate can as well affect the quality of local air. Atmospheric warming related with climate change has the ability to maximize ground level ozone in various parts of the world which may affect compliance with the ozone standards in the future. Concentration of particulate matter and ozone in the air have led to increased climate warming as well as air stagnation as well as rising temperature and carbon dioxide maximize pollen, molds as well as spores which maximizes the risk of allergic respiratory illnesses (Demain, 2018). Given that climate change can impact many unexpected and persistent impacts on allergic respiratory illnesses, it is important to advocate for efficient mitigation as adaptation techniques to reduce its respiratory health impacts (Urrutia-Pereira, Guidos-Fogelbach, & Sole, 2021). Comment by Eric R Wellington: A bit better here.

Measures to Mitigate Climate change

Since air pollution and greenhouse gases are mostly produced from similar sources, thus reducing greenhouse gas emission can be used to reduce climate change. This can be achieved through improving the insulation of building, travelling in more fuel efficient vehicles and using more effective electrical appliance in order to minimize energy use as well as CO2 productions. It can as well be used to reduce personal energy used through turning off lights as well as electronics when they are not being used in order to minimize the demand of electricity. Minimizing the distance that is travelled in vehicles minimizes petroleum consumption. Comment by Eric R Wellington: Again where is the data to support any of this?

In order to manage climate change, it is essential to adapt to life in a changing climate, this mainly involves adjusting to actual or expected future climate. The main aim is to manage the vulnerability to the dangerous impacts of climate change. It mainly involves making the most of any beneficial opportunities related to climate change. People have been adjusting to and coped with changes in climate as well as extremes with various levels of success. As the climate change, we are required to learn to adapt, the more the climate changes, the harder it could be. People should work on building flood defenses, plan for heat waves as well as high temperatures, establish water permeable pavements to address the issue of floods as well as storm water and enhance water storage and use. Comment by Eric R Wellington: How do we know this will work. Comment by Eric R Wellington: How? Comment by Eric R Wellington: Who is saying this?

Technological innovation should as well be promoted to deal with climate change. Some technological solutions such as solar panels and wind turbines that turn sun and wind into electricity without producing greenhouse gases are effective ways of dealing with climate change. As technologies have scaled up and converted energy more effectively, they have now reduced in price to become cheaper in comparison to fuels all over the world. Comment by Eric R Wellington: This is a very good part, but again you have no support tor data/

Additionally, consumer appliances and equipment standards should be introduced. Retrofitting building which involve modifying the existing commercial buildings which may enhance energy efficiency or decrease energy demand. It involves upgrading the energy performance of commercial building assets for their ongoing life. Renewable energy can be used to reduce carbon pollution and has minimal carbon pollution and has minimal impact on the environment. They do not produce carbon dioxide as well as other greenhouse gases which lead to global warming. This may as well involve introducing feed on tariffs, market based appliances and fiscal instrument to improve the investment in clean energy (Hayes, et al., 2018). They are promising small scale producers of the energy which is an above market price for that which they delivered to the grid. Comment by Eric R Wellington: Give specific evidence on how this works and why it might help change.

Counter Argument Comment by Eric R Wellington: Remove heading.

Carbon dioxide is a global pollutant which is as a result of maximized human activities. This is because it is mainly as a result of burning fossil fuels, producing chemicals in the air, minimizing the level of forest cover and the rapid expansion of farming, as well as industrial operations are producing carbon dioxide in the air and changing the balance of the climate system. Additionally, the developing nation is responsible of about 63% of the current carbon emissions. This is due to increased deforestation as a result of resource exploitation, and urban expansion. Comment by Eric R Wellington: This needs much more work and you should be bringing up the counter to all major points and again with evidence.

Conclusion

Climate change has a major impact on the cost to an individual health. It an impact both the social and environmental determinants of health which may include clean air, safe drinking water, food as well as shelter. The direct damage costs to health are about 4 billion per year by 2030. Minimizing emissions of greenhouse gases through effective transport, food and energy use options can lead to enhanced health mainly through minimized air pollution. Comment by Eric R Wellington: Comment by Eric R Wellington: Where did this data come from.

References

Demain, J. G. (2018). Climate change and the impact on respiratory and allergic disease: 2018. Current allergy and asthma reports, 18(4), 1-5.

Hayes, K., Blashki, G., Wiseman, J., Burke, S., & Reifels, L. (2018). Climate change and mental health: Risks, impacts and priority actions. International journal of mental health systems, 12(1), 1-12.

Mocuta, D. N. (2017). Influence of the climate changes on the human life quality, in rural areas. Revista de Chimie, 68(6), 1392-1396.

Urrutia-Pereira, M., Guidos-Fogelbach, G., & Solé, D. (2021). Climate changes, air pollution and allergic diseases in childhood and adolescence. Jornal de pediatria.

Ragavan, M. I., Marcil, L. E., & Garg, A. (2020). Climate change as a social determinant of health. Pediatrics, 145(5).

Reflection Questions

Provide one example of a place where you have used rhetorical appeals or source material to support your argument. How does this enhance your essay? (2-3 sentences)

I use source material throughout my essay. I as well made use of statistics to explain that more than 70% of the world’s population gets majority of the daily nutrients from plants.

Touchstone 4 is a revision of this draft. What kind of feedback would be helpful for you as you revise? Are there parts of your draft that you’re uncertain of? (3-4 sentences).

I believe that I have done my best in this draft. Therefore I would consider having another person identify my mistakes and have them give their opinion. A detailed evaluation on my work will assist me identify the errors that might be hard for me to identify. Comment by Eric R Wellington: You make good point, but need to back them up.

Touchstone 3.2 Rubric and Feedback
Rubric Category	Feedback	Score (acceptable, needs improvement etc.)
Argument Development and Support	he argument is poorly developed with irrelevant details that frequently distract from the argument; there is little evidence of the use of rhetorical appeals and/or source material.	20/40 Needs improvement
Research	Does not cite sources, or citation is consistently inappropriate; does not reference sources and/or sources are not credible or appropriate.	0/30 Non performance
Organization	Includes all of the required components of an argumentative research paper, including an introduction with background information, an argumentative thesis, an adequate number of body paragraphs with topic sentences, a body paragraph addressing counterargument(s), and a conclusion with a concluding statement.	10/15 Proficient
Style	Demonstrates generally effective style choices, but may include occasional redundancies, imprecise language, poor word choice, and/or repetitive sentence structures.	3/5 acceptable
Conventions	There are occasional minor errors in grammar, punctuation, spelling, capitalization, formatting, and usage.	4/5 Proficient
Reflection	Demonstrates thoughtful reflection; includes multiple insights, observations, and/or examples, following response length guidelines.	4/5 Proficient
Total 41/100 I have inserted several comments in the paper for places to review to improve. You have some fine points, but need to be much more clear and provide data and reference to back up those points. There is very little to a counter argument and no support for many of your points. The topic is a good one, but much more detailed and supported analysis needs to be made.