On the other hand, not so many people are familiar with these sexual choices. But we cannot blame them, because when we try to focus on one thing another arises. Now, the issue of sexuality begun before we were even born. It has evolved, and so many scholars have written about it because of the constant demand from the public. And here is where it becomes interesting. These scholars are the ones who are promoting young adults, or even full adults, to try different sexual positions.
Furthermore, when they experience these immense pleasures, they want to try them on people of the same sex. For instance, Marquis de Sade wrote about the joys of having anal sex. Here, he explains the benefits of it, how it can be done with a woman and also a man (pp. 42-43). Sade did not even refute the pain that comes with it. Instead, he said that we should embrace it. That we should do what our body desires because it's what nature wants.
Well, that is interesting, however, when that happens, do all these people get attracted to both genders or they stick with one gender and if so, which one is it? Chances are he will be fascinated with both sexes. And there have been so many cases of bisexual people in the modern world but are some of them born this way or is it just a phase? And if it's a phase, what is the driving force that is pushing them towards bisexuality?
Before we answer that question, let's focus on giving a proper definition of gender and sexuality. Gender can be defined merely like the range of features of masculinity and feminity. In other words, it refers to the state of being male or female. It starts from when a newborn is brought to this earth, when parents deal with the dilemma of buying a blue or pink blanket or when parents want to buy a pink or blue cake. Generally, gender is connected to everything we do, from the food we eat, the clothes we wear or the type of work we do. It pretty much starts from our childhood until the day we are laid six feet underground. But as much as we focus too much on the issues of gender, there are a lot of theories, opinions, and emotions surrounding it.
Sexuality, however, is a much more complex topic. First of all, sex is the sexual organ one possesses, and sexuality is an extension of sex which means the sexual orientation one has experienced over the years. As in, sexuality deals with our sexual feelings and the sexual activities we engage in during our free time. It refers to that person we are fascinated with, be it a man or a woman or a combination of both. It is something we hold dearly, and from the beginning of time, we have always learned that the perfect pair of sexuality is that between a man and a woman. However, as time goes on, we see that there are so many different sexual choices that we have never heard before.
For instance, some people are considered gay. These are individuals who sleep with people of the same sex or even better; they end up marrying each other. Until recently, homosexuality was considered a taboo in the society. It was something that was seen as very shameful because we regard as a downgrade to someone's lifestyle. As in, when one was considered gay, he or she had to keep that secret from friends, family and even the society at large. But nowadays society is changing, and people have begun embracing those who are gay or even heterosexuals. The idea of coming out of the closet had become a forefront of gay individuals when it used to be the exception.
Bisexuality is also another example of sexuality. Here, a person is fascinated with both male and female. In other words, the term is used to describe sexual feelings and sexual attraction towards both men and women. Many people, straight and gay, feel threatened by this term because some say that they are people who are afraid to admit that they are gay. The fact is that how people see bisexuality is purely subjective because the way we define it challenges our cultural norms and beliefs related to intimacy, sexuality, gender, and relationships.
However, we cannot consider bisexuality as something untreatable since it is not a disease but rather a mind concept someone adopted over the years while growing up. The only thing that can be looked is the stigmatization of these people because there has been so many cases of homosexual and heterosexual communities discriminating them. As in, it is evident that the social pressure of going against the rule of monogamy is creeping up to them. In other words, when people tease them about having feelings for both sexes, it affects their mental health, but there have been a few specific therapies that have been brought forward to help them tackle this issue.
Bisexuality is something that most people experience during their lifetime even though they are straight. They experience some weird fantasies on people of their sexes because they feel the urge to try something new and exciting. Therefore, it can be stated that some bisexual people are born this way; hence we must help them see the beautiful side of life by making them feel as comfortable as possible. Moreover, one should relate well with them and accept them for who they are. The society at large should also be taught how to take bisexual people and live in harmony with them by not interfering with their freedom and beliefs.
In her book, A Midwife's Tale, Laurel Thatcher said that the mid-eighteenth century was an era when young people began to exercise greater freedom in choosing marriage partners when romance and sexual attraction between couples become more critical than economic negotiations between parents (p. 138). Well, this can be related to the modern day argument about bisexuality. It is considered more of a romance than just sex. Furthermore, all these people do is flirt with both genders and indulge in discussions involving anal sex just like Marquis de Sade did. They get along well with individuals of both sexes, and they also like touching other parts, such as hands, of these people sexually whenever they hang out. Sometimes it can be hard to notice bisexual people and the only way they will tell you that they are bi is when they admit it in person.
The idea of bisexuality is becoming more and more transparent because many people have begun accepting it. They have come to realize that when we deny a person something, maybe they will end up doing something that is of dire consequence to their daily lives. For instance, Sigmund Freud stated in his book, Totem, and Taboo, that whenever the individual finds it impossible to dominate the difficulties of the world of reality, there is regression to the infantile and psychic disturbances ensue which are conceived as peculiar thoughts and acts (p. XII).
Bisexual people have had many accomplishments. Some reports suggest that about 1.9% of men consider themselves bisexual while 2.9% of women are either bisexual or lesbians. Even the first openly bisexual state officeholder was elected in Oregon as the Secretary of state. Furthermore, in 2011, the National Equality March was carried out that allowed both men and women to be open about their sexuality. Overall, reports show that fewer men identify as bisexual than gay compared to a large number of women who considers themselves bisexual than lesbians.
In 2012, the first official day recognizing bisexuals was established in Berkeley, California. The council passed the law unanimously and without even thinking twice. Furthermore, they also met with officials from the Whitehouse to ponder on specific issues that are affecting the bisexual community. It was the first time such an event was held in the Whitehouse. In 2014, there was a research carried out to raise public awareness on the health issues affecting bisexual people and also to discuss the way forward of raising such awareness nationally.
Politically, the first person to join the Congress was Krysten Sinema who was elected to the house of representatives in November 2012. Three years later, Kate Brown joined her in the world of politics as an openly bisexual governor when the old governor of Oregon resigned. She was even re-elected when she ran again for the same seat. As for Sinema, she was also the first bisexual person to win a place in the Senate in 2018. In the same year, the first city-wide Bi pride event was held in West Hollywood.
Generally, many people argue that disallowing or denying bisexuals is the same as going against their human rights albeit the term "human rights" being flexible. Bisexuality is more about impartiality than human rights; therefore, restricting their freedom affects their happiness and choices. Furthermore, their healthy lifestyle is disrupted because a feeling of inequality is created when they are denied the chance to live together as other ordinary people do. Therefore, we should let them be because even scholars such as Marquis de Sade in his book, The Immoral Mentors, argued that a person's body belongs to him and him alone (p. 35). He is the only person in the world who has the right to enjoy his body whichever way he wants.
Some people also argue that bisexual people are loyal, tolerant and exhibit respect towards the community. Their participation in family life is also impeccable compared to people with other sexual orientations. Their interests, beliefs, lifestyle, and opinions are more sophisticated and refined. Most of them are law-abiding citizens who serve in different school boards, are committed towards society and are volunteers in charities. Hence, bisexuality is not just sex; it brings out the true identity of a person.
In conclusion, every human being in society should have the right to choose whatever he or she wants. Even Sade himself stated that people should follow the laws of nature (p. 40). That we should enjoy the pleasures that the world has bestowed upon us by making sure we accept who we are. In the long run, we shall live in harmony if we accept who we are.
Works Cited
Freud, Sigmund. "Totem and taboo (AA Brill, Trans.)." New York: New Republic (1913).
Sade, Marquis de. "Philosophy in the Boudoir." Trans. Joachim Neugroschel. New York: Penguin (2006).
Ulrich, Laurel. A midwife's tale: The life of Martha Ballard, based on her diary, 1785-1812. Vintage, 1991.