10 pages essay for ATH 301 course

Summary:How racial discrimination has an affect in a community. Racially charged actions can affect education, opportunities, and others political affiliations. Profiling and prejudices can stem from stereotypes and the majority group creating a hierarchy.

Things I liked: I think by creating sections for the paper allowed it to flow better. It allowed the reading to know exactly what they are going to be reading. Since you broke the paper into sections maybe add exactly what ethnic groups you will be discussing in the paper so it gives the reader more of a sense of what groups you will be talking about further along. Tell us who the discriminators are and who the discriminated are.

Constructive Criticism: Be careful to simple typos. There were some small mechanical errors throughout the paper that needs to be fixed. Make sure not to repeat the same descriptive words in the same sentence. I’ve noticed throughout the paper “it should be noted” has been used a lot. Also, make sure the transition between sections flow well. Even though sections are broken into different parts, it still needs to be one concise paper. By aware of run on sentences as well. I saw a couple throughout the paper.

Grade: 80/100 – I found that there were multiple mechanical errors throughout the paper. The paper was clear, however I think if you were to talk about a specific group of people it would strengthen the paper. As of right now, the paper of too broad. Make it more specific and you will be good to go. Also, try not to use the exact same wording Dr. Peterson used for your section titles.