Journal 8

Submission Feedback

Overall Feedback

10% deduction for late submission. 

Thanks for submitting this to me, Sandy. I can see how well you've considered your characters and their world and storyline. I look forward to seeing you develop this further.

Submission Feedback

Overall Feedback

Nice work this week, Sandy! Your responses were well-considered and clear. 

I wonder about your assignment from last week though. I emailed you asking you to resubmit the correct file (you submitted something from a different class), but I never got a resubmission. If you could pass the right file along to me a.s.a.p., that'd be great!

Submission Feedback

Overall Feedback

You talked around the topics a bit more than I'd like to see in this assignment. Rather, I'd like to see you engage with the material and apply it to specific examples from your own project. It's okay if one of the sources doesn't align with the type of project you want to do. Various structural approaches can be applied to genres, other than the one they are addressing. I used screenplay structure to write the first draft of my novel, for example. There is some practical use across mediums.

Submission Feedback

Overall Feedback

I'm intrigued by this dynamic. It reminds me of other stories I've read and seen, but I'm excited to see your take on the whole thing. 

One cautionary note: I know that this type of conflict is typical of this era, but I worry that the daughter is simply the prize to be won in both scenarios. Either she's the approved suitor's prize or she runs off with her unapproved suitor and her father has lost all hope and suffers financial ruin. That seems like a lot to put on a character who doesn't seem to have much agency in the story. How might you heighten her role in the story and modernize some of these themes?

Submission Feedback

Overall Feedback

I'm intrigued by this dynamic. It reminds me of other stories I've read and seen, but I'm excited to see your take on the whole thing. 

One cautionary note: I know that this type of conflict is typical of this era, but I worry that the daughter is simply the prize to be won in both scenarios. Either she's the approved suitor's prize or she runs off with her unapproved suitor and her father has lost all hope and suffers financial ruin. That seems like a lot to put on a character who doesn't seem to have much agency in the story. How might you heighten her role in the story and modernize some of these themes?

Submission Feedback

Overall Feedback

Well done, Sandy. Your setting is clearly configured in this document and seems to accompany your story well.

Submission Feedback

Overall Feedback

Nice work, Sandy. You certainly sound professional and polished in your responses. I would like to see some more specifics about your piece though and less generalizations. Tell me about your characters and your story.