Rev Essay

Essay #1

‘IT TAKE A VILLAGE TO RAISE A CHILD ‘

I was raised in a home with my mother, father and 2 sibling. It was the best we ate breakfast lunch and dinner together as a family and had family nights even vacations every year. My parents was just really strict with us when it came to school and church. They believe an education is the key to success and a family that pray together stays together. My father was a Chief of Radiology and my mother was a Certified Nursing Assistant’s off and on because my father always said he wanted her to stay home cook clean and take care of my siblings and I. My mother would work close to holidays only to bring home extra money and she always said she want her own money she don’t want to depend on no man married or not.

I remember out of nowhere my father slow down at work and was in the hospital as a patience more and more. My mother use to sneak and cry but try to remain strong so my sibling and I wouldn’t see her breaking down crying. So one day my mother send us away to my grandmother house that wasn’t to far away from where we reside at. I over heard my grandmother telling my other family members that my father was diagnose with the last stage of Hodgkin Lymphoma Cancer. A week later we had a family gathering and my mother broke the news to me ‘Your father didn’t make it , he didn’t make it he die while I was in the room with him during visiting hours” I felt like a part of my life was taken I was only 15 years old he was the only male figure as a role model in my life .I was young but wanted to stay strong for my mother because at that time she needed me more than I needed her. I was hurt but I know she was destroy.

After my father funeral my siblings and I went back home. Days later a strange man knock on the door my mother look as if she went into shock as she seen who was at the front step. He shove his way in the house and demanded out loud ‘ Tell my daughter Chanette the truth or I’ll tell her ‘ he was dress in a white button up and some tan khaki pants and white converse sneakers. I was scare , lost, shock and didn’t know who this man was and why he calling me his daughter and why he is so aggressive and stern. He was walking toward my way my heart was pounding and it like the whole room shut down. I ran behind my mom while she still look puzzle in the face. He said out loud ‘ I was incarcerated for 14 years and I’ve my freedom and going to take care my only child Chanette you no longer playing house with her”. Tears rush down my mother face while I’m thinking that this crazy man in front of me only claiming me as his child and not my older brother or sister. My mom said loud and clear “Any man can have a kid but it takes a village to raise a child “. Now I’m just confused and devasted because a part of me is telling me this crazy man that was incarcerated was a part of me but a lost long part of me someone like my biological father.

My mother and the crazy man got mature and sat me down and my mother exact words was ‘ Clark raise you but this man in front of you is your biological father and I hide that from you to protect you because he was on heavy drugs cocaine and heroin and committed a murder and did 14 years and been release on life parole “. My mother went on to her trying to support him but he abused her physically and mentally stole from her and much more harmful things. I was mad at her from keeping this secret from me but felt bad that she was a victim of domestic violence and have to live with the fact she had a child by him which is me.

I gave the crazy man which was my biological father a chance to be there for me and I forgive him because he said the time he was incarcerated gave him nothing but time to think and learn from his mistake. Months came into our daughter and father bond and I notice mood swings and a change of behavior. He start using heavy drugs again and his focus was trying to get in a relationship with my mother which she deny but I beg her to have him live with us she kept saying no but I made her change her mind which was horrible. We came home one day and he rob our whole house from furniture clothes and every item in the house that was worth money . I blame myself because now my mother has to start all over to supply for my siblings and I . She told me ‘ It not your fault he might be your biological father , but your nothing like him you my daughter and ill protect you until the die the good lord decide to take me away “ . I came to the conclusion this lie I was living with for these years was to protect me and keep me out of harm way and from getting hurt , & now that I’m a young mother if I’ve to ever come across a situation when I’ve to be dishonest to avoid pain to my child I would. It really takes a Village To Raise A Child.