FOR NJOSH ONLY
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EmotionalProcesses-day2.pptxEmotional Processes, pt. 2
HDFS 215
Emotional Triangles
When two people have an on-going issue, they focus on something or someone else.
Triangulation allows us to stabilize, displace our anxiety, or control the issues.
Triangle in people, objects, work, hobbies.
2
Friedman’s “7 Laws about Emotional Triangles”
3rd person is part of the triangle’s homeostasis.
3rd person may want to stop triangulation, but will have difficulty trying to change the relationship of the other two people.
Trying to bring people together or separate them usually fails.
Friedman Cont’d
The 3rd person usually ends-up with the stress of the other two people.
Triangles within a system interlock.
It is unhealthy for one person to always be the focus of conflict.
We can only change the system we are in.
How to deal with triangles?
Wait until you can objectively think about the triangle.
Connect equally with other 2 people in triangle.
Identify what issue is at the heart of the triangle.
If that does not work…
Think of ways to emotionally distance yourself.
Draw boundaries
Time
Availability
Physical contact
Topics you will or will not discuss
Be kind and assertive.
Emotional Processes Summary
Three key points:
When emotional processes are managed effectively in families, families are healthier.
Emotional freedom increases when differentiation occurs.
Two areas of concern:
Fusion
Chronic Family Anxiety
Now…
Apply the concepts to our readings from Wall’s The Glass Castle.
