essay revision

Yi

Do it when it’s no too late

Name: Andre Yi

Professor: Michele Bigley

Course:Writing 27-02

Date: Nov 27th, 2018

People who lives in the United States for their whole lifespan would unlikely experienced how bad the air condition was in Beijing. I’ve spent two years of my childhood there, and the most unforgettable moment is when I had respiratory disease due to the air pollution. Basically I can’t see the objective in half mile away from me when I stood by the window and tried to see something green. There were a bunch of american friends wondered how serious is the air pollution in China, especially in Beijing. Normally I will ask them back with the question “Do you know the feeling of a group of people smoking around you and blow the smoke to you?” The air pollution is not just happening in Beijing, it is also happening in every cities all over the world. As an environmental science student, I have no doubt that we should start protecting our only home planet, at least start awaring of it. Comment by Michele Bigley: talk about the rhetorical situation--urgent need to do something and why/how both Beavan and your home country campaign are trying to make change in a meaningful way. Comment by Michele Bigley: Not sure about this.

The meaning for health and sustainable environment is slowly being diminished by the human population. Most of the things which are used by the people have harmful effects on the environment although individuals are not aware. Beavan decided to enlighten the people on the negative impacts of carrying out unsustainable activities on the environment(Beavan, 2009). Colin Beavan uses ethos to persuade the audience where he did a research and explained numerous impacts especially the air pollution that have happened to the planet due to unsustainable human activities. Beavan also used logos to speak to the audience and making them see the logic of impacting the environment with contaminants. Beavan used the experiment to demonstrate what we can actually do in our daily life for example choose bike and scooter instead of drive a car to travel from places to places in order to reduce the carbon dioxide emission(Beavan, 2009). The use of the pathos in the book is seed in the family of Beavan and the audience is touched by the story to follow what the family was doing to ensure a healthy environment.

Pathos mainly shows the emotion of the audience towards a certain situation. Colin illustrated how human beings are endangering the environment with the activities which they do on daily basis(Beaven, 2009). An example is the way which people use to travel and how they are affecting the current atmosphere temperature. Melting of the ice is causing the polar bears to drown and they are eating one another due to lack of food and global warming. This raised the emotion of the people who care about the environment and wish to save their animals from dying. It broke the heart of the viewers on how precious animals are suffering and eating one another. Colin shows how he influenced his family to continue undertaking sustainable strategies which aim in saving the environment such as not taking the elevator but instead walking the stairs in order to reduce the Carbon Dioxide that may be emissts(Beavan, 2009). He did a fantastic work which caught the attention of the audience and made them feel better when they realized that the kind of lives people enjoys an impact on the environment negatively.

The audience, in this case, is every individual who cares and tries to preserve the environment. Logos is demonstrated when Collins spoke with the audience so that they could see the logic in his experiment. His project of riding a bike for his daily transportation. This proves the scientific data to show that how much waste gases are reduced and it is best achieved when sound environmental strategies are used. Other logos in the document can be shown by the way the family of Collins is happy after starting living a lifestyle which has no impact on the environment(Beaven, 2009). The ethos shown in the document when Collins did a research and explained to the audience about the effects people are causing on the environment(Beaven, 2009). Beavan clearly shows the elements of rhetorical situation, which he is speaking to the people who cares about the environment with the genre of a non-fiction book to appeal them to start changing their lifestyle to solve the environment issues. According to Bitzer (1968), “Rhetorical discourse comes into existence as a response to situation, in the same sense that an answer comes into existence in response to a question, or a solution in response to a problem” (p.5). The film “Under the dome” is the “response” to my american friends who ask me how bad the air really is in China.

Chai Jing, a well-known compere in Chinese official television channel, who gave up her career and started investigate the reason of air pollution in China. This film is a collection of her investigation, she spent more than 2 years, travelled over 4500 miles to collect the truth as detailed as possible. She also interviewed more than 170 people to tried her best to get closer to the air pollution reason(Chai, 2015). These introduction in the beginning of the film is the use of ethos that it reveals the journey of Chai so that we will be convinced by the following video and can really understand how is the people’s lives condition under the dome. Chai Jing gave an example of herself being pregnant when China had extreme air pollution that ended up affecting her unborn child. The child required surgery immediately after birth because the child had a tumor(Chai, 2015). In her interviewers, there are some mothers have to abort their unborn children due to the serious health condition of the infants, and the causes is because those mothers breath in overdose polluted air particles(Chai, 2015). Chai uses her personal experience to triggered the pathos. When her audience heard about their experiences, they will feel sorry and will stand on their side immediately. The audience especially the mothers will be touched effectively by these actual personal experience.

Chai also illustrates the use of the logos to demonstrate how the people who lived in the Shanxi province were affected by the smoke which used to come from the nearby plant. The smoke affects the eyes of the people and chokes them. A girl who is six years old admits that since she was born she has not been able to see the blue sky(Chai, 2015). The film opened the eyes of many people who had not understood the impact of the smoke pollution to the environment and to their health. The main reason why the air condition is extremely unlivable in Shanxi Province is because the factories had broken regulation and there is no individual company that minded on the following the outline rules and laws and regulations(Chai, 2015). The authorities ignore the impact which is made by the industries and there is no punishment for the companies that break the law. People have health problems due to air pollution such as eyes problems, birth defects, and respiratory diseases(Chai, 2015).

The film creates awareness of air pollution and its impact using persuasion where it tries to convince those in authority to tighten their belt on ensuring all regulations have been followed. It enlightens the people to wake up and fight against air pollution in China which is affecting millions of people(Chai, 2015). People will address the issue of air pollution to the national government which seems to have ignored its duty. The film shows Chai taking initial action to report the business which was polluting the environment(Chai, 2015). The author asked people to be more active in ensuring that every person gets to understand the impact. The film also focused on the impact of air pollution on the health of poor people who have difficulty in accessing medical treatment when they have problems. Some of them have even died. Similarly, the government responded to the issue addressed by Chai and she was thanked by the Minister of Environment for making great contributions in China(Chai, 2015).

I watched a documentary film when I was 11 years old. The film describes the earth in 3.1 millions ago when human beings were not existed yet. At that time, the Earth’s atmosphere stayed in a very stable status that there over 42 percent oxygen and less than 3 percent of the polluted particles in the air(Ancient Earth, 2009). All the creatures at that time are able to breath the extreme fresh air and never have to worry about the respiratory diseases. 2.5 millions years old, human beings appeared on this planet; our brilliant ancestors used their wisdom to create one and one “objective”, but at the same time, our mother Earth has been polluted again and again. Since the secondary revolution of industries, the overall air quality of Earth was tremendously changed. In current atmosphere, the percentage of oxygen is only 21 percent, but the nitrogen and carbon dioxide have the percentage over 78 percent. What’s more, the polluted particles that contained in the air was increased from 0.02 percent to 0.7 percent(Wilford, 2018). These data are the undoubtable fact that telling us our mother Earth is sick. It has the serious respiratory disease itself. If we don’t do anything but just keep damaging her body, we all will be affected eventually. Do it when it is not too late. Comment by Michele Bigley: I like this info. I need to see you connect to the rest of your paper. Comment by Michele Bigley: Name this Comment by Michele Bigley: cite Comment by Michele Bigley: So what do we do? Comment by Michele Bigley: Cut down the documentary summary, include one piece of data, show how we should be talking about this urgent situation in a meaningful way.

Reference

Wilford, John. "When Humans Became Human". Nytimes.Com, 2018, https://www.nytimes.com/2002/02/26/science/when-humans-became-human.html. Accessed 26 Nov 2018.

Beavan, Colin. “How to Reduce Your Carbon Footprint and Anger Your Mother at the Same Time.” No Impact Man: the Adventures of a Guilty Liberal Who Attempts to Save the Planet, and the Discoveries He Makes about Himself and Our Way of Life in the Process, by Colin Beavan, Picador/Farrar, Straus, and Giroux, 2010, pp. 73–105.

“YouTube.” Performance by Jing Chai, YouTube, YouTube, 1 Mar. 2015, www.youtube.com/watch?v=T6X2uwlQGQM&t=0s&list=WL&index=2 .

Jones, Mike. "Ancient Earth". Youtube, 2018, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9asVZNJnfC8. Accessed 26 Nov 2018.